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I Can't Stand My Wife Anymore

Here is the deal. I'm 29 my wife is 26. We'll be married for 5 years this September. I can't stand her anymore. When I was working for an multinational company I met her in Romania. We knew each other for almost a year, then we started dating We got married 4 months later. She does nothing but smoke cigarettes and talk on the phone with her family back in Romania. She acts like 5 year old. Yelling, screaming, and crying when she wants something, and she can be very selfish. For example when my mother was on her death bed (in the hospital days before her death), I was not thinking about anything else. She barged in the room (after smoking her 100th cigarette for the day), and told me she saw a house that she liked and told me that the guy had some bids and wanted me to act fast. I told her I didn't care about house shopping and she accused me of not caring about her feelings. When my mom finally died, I got a tattoo of her on my arm. She didn't want me getting it. She caused a really huge fight for days. She even fought with me about this the day I cremated my mother. I have to go to Romania 2 or 3 times a year, and live with her parents when I stay there. I hate it. But I stay in their apartment. She ******* everytime we go 2 hours away to visit my sister and my dad, and stay overnight. She limits the amount of time my family can come over the house we just bought. She doesn't like to have my family over when our friends are here. These are just a few things. I can't divorce her. 2 of the properties I own are in her name, I have some land under her sister's name. I would loose 1/2 a million if I tried to divorce her.
Sheiskillingme Sheiskillingme 26-30, M 58 Responses Jan 30, 2008

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I'm married to an Israeli. She's just as bad, possibly much worse. Not a shred of empathy, compassion or sensitivity and she hates my entire family. What nightmare.. I'm on SSD and she's a well paid Dir. Admin. I'm stuck and I'm deadly unhappy. I can relate buddy! Getting married to her was a big mistake. She'd generous with me. But she's also 5' 5", 240 pounds and really horrible.

Christian husbands put their wives needs before their own. Grow up and love your wife. God doesn't only when it "feel" good to you or only when she is just what "you" need...he commands you to love her even when she doesn't deserve it. Seems like you are not being a man. And if you don't like staying with her family, stop going there. Grow up and open a Bible. You are a Passive husband. And you both need to "leave and Cleave" google it.

I agree 100% with what you say. And too bad about the property -- you might try tricking her -- get her to start a business and tell her that she needs to redeed the property so she can't be touched personally if she goes bankrupt. Be assured down the road she will probably dump you if she gets another pigeon, so you might get half in the settlement. Just keep standing up for yourself and she will hate your guts but be careful, they usually have bad tempers and come from countries where they could care less if someone gets killed.

I too made the mistake of falling in love with a Croatian and it is just as you describe but with out the cigarettes -- you feel like you are with a spoiled brat 2 year old that has never emotionally matured and never will. You totally DO NOT MATTER IN THE EQUATION. Its hard to describe unless you have hooked up with one.

When I met the rest of the fam, they are the same -- immature, paranoid idiots who think you are not good enough for their 2 year old princess. Their parents act like Grandparents gushing all over them, calling them constantly and expecting you to spoil them too...and for your information usually have no respect for Canadians or Americans. We are at the bottom of their totem pole so when you visit them and they are talking in their foreign know its about you and isn't good. In their opinion, they are a superior race, came to our country to help us stupid idiots make the country better as apparently we have no clue how to parent, feed our kids, cut our lawns and laugh because we stupidly pay our taxes. They can't wait to get back to good old...Romania or some other war torn country every chance they get because when you are emotionally 2, it really is too young to leave your parents home but like the money here.

Everything in the relationship is selfish, one sided right down to not wanting to spend time with my family or friends visit or even visit. If I do go by myself as I don't want to relinquish all ties with my family and friends, well then she is jealous and there is some form of spiteful revenge waiting for me on return. I have been doing this for 20 years and have had very little contact with my son and friends because it isn't worth the hassle. She doesn't want my only son in the house to stay over -he is even forbidden to use the bathroom upstairs. Nor will she spend the money for Xmas or birthday gifts even for me.....but do not let me or my son forget her birthday! SELFISH BEYOND SELFISH.

If the attention goes off these european spoiled brats for one minute (can't figure out if narcissistic, borderline or just plain spoiled brat personality disorder) they will act up. She might just leave the room, go to bed without saying a word, start crying, start walking home (2 hr. walk) - because I took too long inside at the ice cream stand -- and believe me if she says do it right now and you get some spine and don't --it then becomes "then take me right home screaming at the top of her lungs" in front of the public. Just like a 2 year old at the grocery store, she has no self control, nor sense of shame, and its always my fault if she loses it! Then the sulking goes for days.

She is heartless as well. You could be taking the family dog to the vet to put the pet down and she would be complaining that she might have to carry the leash, or make fun of you that you are crying and insist you be quiet. She will never crack a tear over anything except if you stand up to her nonsense -- then she goes back to a wounded 2.

Until you have had a European spoiled brat wife, you have no idea how hellish life can be. Your money is important but I think they create cancer with their behavior. Find a good plan and run forest run! Believe me she will tell her victim tale to some other sypathetic man -- and he will save the damsel in distress -- down the road he too will find out its a devil in a dress!

cooper I agree 100 percent!!! its all about the money for the them.

being raised in the military and married into it .

I saw that over and over again

yes human life is nothing to them

That sucks that women have the uper hand I'm a stay at home day I do it all and I still can't get " wow what a good job " all I get is bs ! I just think it women To be a pain in the azz ! Us men can do anything right ! And what's make me more crazy is when we do it u know sex she tells me make it fast I get soft and I walk away f her and I know I could find a younger lady that would rock me like I like to be rocked ! But what would it get me ! Us men can't Win

Hide your $$ and get the f out I'm looking to do the same but I have a child with the ****

you cant do anything but put up with it or you lose out. I would work quietly over time to get titles changed and money put away.

Hire a fixer, and extinguish this eurotrash.

WOWWWW hello everybody ..i'm Adina and i'm from Romania ...just a question : what bullshit is this???<br />
this SCi-Fi story is about a man who's so afraid to lose a big amount of money ( i suppose that you made this fortune legally :))) because of his stupid wife .A smart man like you came in my country and picked from thousands of girls ..this ***** . ....made 2 kids with her and after 5 years he realized that is too much ..<br />
when you marry someone, you already see that person next to you in 10,15, 100 years from now on ,you love her and the most important thing you can rely each other ...<br />
btw : i didn't choose to be born in Rom , but i'm proud of me as human being you the ones who underestimate a person without knowing here go **** your self ..i'm smart , nice and beautiful and i traveled a lot in this world so i know what i'm saying ..PEACE !!!

well, she's acting like that because she's insecure, her "emotional" needs are not beeing fulfilled, she's afraid, she's weak, she probably has little revenue, she's unsatisfied profesionally, etc. <br />
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you could... try to help her fix all those things. start by putting her into some kind of job training, helping her find a job. it is difficult and maybe she just doesn;t have what it takes to work hard, be nice & loving, etc. In this case - you should definetely let her go, but try that first. <br />
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maybe she is just a pretty face. is that enough for you?<br />
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try to sell the properties maybe tell her you have a great idea, invest in a business or something like that, maybe sell only one or two, so she doesn't get suspicios, be very very nice and emotional with her for 6 months - 1 year (she will NOT see through this if you keep it long enough), act/be happy together, after 4 months, tell her about the business "idea" and how you'll become rich together, etc., sell the properties, dump her, cut some losses.

hey be nice to her, and convince her that you want to sell the property which is there on her and her sister's name, after collecting the money.......divorce her....these kind of women never change man.....


Dump the *****! Property is nothing, you can always start again. Life's way too short to get it spoiled because you would loose too much. You don't have kids (I hope), so it's time to dump her. Check with a lawyer, maybe you can get something back if you can prove you made or are making the payments on her properties. In any case, freedom is priceless!

i hate to say it but ............ just ask ANY AMERICaN FEMALE, WE WOULD OF TOLD YOU ... STAY AWAY FROM THIRD WORLD TYPS ...........

Forget about the money. Forget about the lands,houses. you're still young. <br />
If you wan't to find yourself suffring all your life fo 500K $ - then don't divcorse<br />
me , if i ware you, i would say - the hell with the money, you'll make much more.<br />
Send her on the first flight to Romania.

I am also and Eastern-European girl and I am not happy for you guys to clock all Eastern-Europeans as money-hoarding monsters. This man made a mistake by marrying the wrong kind of chick and has only himself to blame. Why on earth did he put any property in her name??? <br />
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I work hard as a doctor in UK, just like my (Brithish) husband and I did not get married to get rich. So please do not think all the ladies from Eastern Europe are like the one described here.

Not all of us do go by the crudentials a person has and their personal character you sound like a nice lady.....unfortuantely there are those gold digger types and of course they come from all places..

I am also and Eastern-European girl and I am not happy for you guys to clock all Eastern-Europeans as money-hoarding monsters. This man made a mistake by marrying the wrong kind of chick and has only himself to blame. Why on earth did he put any property in her name??? <br />
<br />
I work hard as a doctor in UK, just like my (Brithish) husband and I did not get married to get rich. So please do not think all the ladies from Eastern Europe are like the one described here.

I am also and Eastern-European girl and I am not happy for you guys to clock all Eastern-Europeans as money-hoarding monsters. This man made a mistake by marrying the wrong kind of chick and has only himself to blame. Why on earth did he put any property in her name??? <br />
<br />
I work hard as a doctor in UK, just like my (Brithish) husband and I did not get married to get rich. So please do not think all the ladies from Eastern Europe are like the one described here.

Yeah and I thought when the local ladies flirted with me overseas it was because I was handsome. Nope i was white, heaven forbid if they found out I was American too. <br />
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CASH COW!<br />
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Been there too. Had to walk out of a resturant carrying my luggage and hail a cab to get away from one. She found my hotel anyway in a large city ! Stalked me . <br />
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( no I didnt sleep with her or promise her a thing )

Run don't walk to the nearest divorce lawyer. And, if you decide to stay with her, get a vasectomy immediately.

I wonder how about board this forum is. I don't trust anything on the internet. It sounds like you are just venting. Try a marriage counselor or a church counselor. If that doesn't work, then you tried. Unfortunately, these things have to get worse to get better. My guess is everyone who has replied to you is divorced except me. Not sure. Thanks for sharing. Now, go to an adult learning center and meet some people. To me, the best way to get away is with a new woman, go look.

You hate her now, imagine her at 4o! In ten years this could be a lesson learned or your life.

Its sad that you are wasting your time with a selfish person. She should grant you a divorce and move back to her mothers, since shes constantly talking to her on the phone. They might be using you to bring the rest of their family to the U.S. By the sound of things I personally think you deserve someone better! Life is really too short to be in an unhappy situation as you have described. But, if you have children then it becomes difficult, dont want to hurt the children.

I agree with some people. I don't think that you should worry about what you're losing, but what you would be gaining. Aside from freedom as some put it, but your dignity. You should NEVER let a woman make you feel like that. She only has as much power as you give her. I'm sure a lawyer would be able to give you the best advice as far as your property, but the way I see it, let her keep it. She can use her hoarded money to keep it up after your gone. There are women out there, hard to find or not, that will you treat you like the man you are. Not like dirt under her feet. She can go back to Romania if she doesn't like it. We only have a certain amount of time to live, and that should be spent bettering ourselves, and being loved for who we are, not the money in our pockets. For someone who lived in a country like that, should understand money isn't everything. Yeah, it can buy you alot of things, but hell when you die, someone who didn't work as you to obtain it gets it cheaper. Don't even tell her your leaving til you're gone. She deserves nothing. I know its hard, and things are easier said than done, but if you really just stepped backed and looked at what you could gain, I'm sure that will be plenty of motivation. Good luck to you.

move on and choose someone who connects with ur star sign. I bet ur a bad match if u dont understand oneanother.

If there are no kids...cut your losses and move on...she's just not that into you

Eh mate, don't stress, you know what you gotta do... leave... the sooner you do it, the sooner you'll recover from it. I walked out on my ex, left behind $250,000 in equity on our house plus a heap of other stuff.... yes it's a lot of money and yes i probably should've fought for it, but regardless leaving that ***** was the smartest thing I ever did. I've since grown up a bit and now realise that money doesn't mean squat, all that matter is health and happiness, as long as you have some dollars to keep them covered, you'll be fine.

dude are you nuts or what i have lost alot over women and i don,t care what is money compared to a perons piece of mind your wife sounds like a major ***** suck it up dont be a *****. walk away and you will be happy trust me i have done this more than once and i have lost at least 100 thousand dollars and i dont care money comes and goes once you lose your mind you probably will never be the same again.

I only wish I had a partner that would have married me along time ago and provide for us. I would be so loving, respectfull and gratefull to some who sounds like you. Yet I cant talk I dont have the courage to leave my partner and he has nothing to offer us bar himself that even that is an effort for him. I know something will end it eventually. Set yourself free and find someone who will love you for you not what you have. Money is nothing if your not happy. I hopr I find the courage too.

Wisdom: All women are "different" until the ring is on.<br />
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All women want the same thing - unconditional love.<br />
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Definition of unconditional love - love ME no matter what crap I'm going to put you through.<br />
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For better or worse (when delivered by a woman) - you're stuck with ME and I don't have to do ANYthing to EARN it. <br />
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Sorry that you had to find out the Hell that is marriage for the same reason most men do - ignorance and hormones.<br />
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The only men that don't feel your pain are in the 1 percentile or liars (to themselves or others).<br />
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Best of luck on regaining your freedom. All us married men cheer inside when another one us of wakes up and frees themselves.

I have a similar problem...<br />
Is there a way to convey my complaints to her... Like why is she always on the phone with her mom and her sister can come to my house anytime she wants while I had to send my parents away because of her...<br />
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Women are *******... My wife is biggest of all...