We Met In High School

I met my wife in high school. I was a junior and she was also. She was beautiful with her green eyes and long blond hair. That was in 1998, I had surgery on my spine that december and found out she went to a party with a cousin while I was in the hospital. Just wait it gets better. We graduated high school I attended college for a year it wasnt for me so I left and started to work.
At this time everything was great relationship was strong and we were having relations once a day maybe 5 times a week we went out talked, laughed, and enjoyed each others company. We moved in together in 2002 had our own apartment. She had a good paying job at a factory and my job wasnt half of what hers paid she was pregnant with my son and had him in oct of 02'. She made the decision that since she made so much money and we were in an income based complex it would be better if I stayed home with our son til he gets a little bit bigger plus it would save us on rent it would drop our monthly rent, I though about it for a little while had some concern but gave in
. Now i have worked since I was 15 so this wasnt easy for me. We did it and I would say a year in a half into it I find out she is talking to some guy who works with her, she had the nerve to tell my sister and thinks she would not tell me. Well she did, she said the guy calls my phone and the next time a certain number shows up to answer it and I did. I got this guy on the phone started talking to him, come to find out she told him and a few other people that she was tired of me not working, oh yeah I said working and that she is the only one with income after she told me to stay home. And I did not just sit at home I learned well from my mom she taught me how to sew, cook, clean, vacuum, do laundry everything I need to learn how to live on my own if i ever did. I think that is what did it thats what stopped me for trusting her anymore, but its still early I have more story to tell.
Since I caught her she fessed up and said I did not do anything I was just accepting gifts from him like bath and body works stuff and I asked her what she did to get that stuff and she said I didnt do anything with anger in her voice. Here she was hanging out with a girl who had a bit of a reputation but she is still an adult and should have known better . She quit her job a week or so later saying she didnt like her job anymore if only people knew the truth.
Lets continue shall we. We broke up for a little while and got back together after that but I have to say I didnt trust her . I worked at odd jobs here and there only being gone for a short times she found jobs here and there also, but I found myself thinking where is she, what is she doing , who is she with, who could she run into. And im thinking this everytime she would leave the house. Now am not this kind of person but this is what I turned into after dating someone from high school giving everything we had to eachother then all that being broken for some stuff . I thought if I really knew her the real person and what her intentions really were.
Time healed some but not all the trust was gone as far as I was concerned . As we went on she landed at a local grocery store, and do I need to say it we split up again, and not even a week after that I find out she was talking to someone from the grocery store an older gentleman just like the last say late 30's while we were early 20's. Made me wonder how long this went on and my little boy is my boy he told me him and mommy stayed the night over his house. Now this is all within a week, it went on for maybe a month she found out that I was dating another girl that we went to school with got upset and wanted to get back together. Which I stupidly did because of our son which I know is not a good reason to be together but one can only hope he would help in our bad situation.
We have been together since that was 2006, since then we have had our beautiful daughter things have been rocky ups and downs like any other but she has gotten greedy, We both work I work under the table make straight cash more than she does in a week I can make in 3 days. We get taxes make money have extra money and she wants everything for her. Now we do good, good enough to get by and she wanted to get a new car we can not really afford one but since she wanted it she went out and got it. Now we did get married, been married going on 3 years now I dont really say anything about what she does because when I do she says I dont get any money back because I have no taxes taken out. When I asked to get me a car with taxes no payments she had an excuse. Every year after taxes she says Ill get a car the following tax year and it hasnt happend for 3 years. I wanted a car for 3k we made alot more than that in taxes and she had a problem with it. This is just one of the problems.
Since our daughters birth we dont even sleep in the same room, we have relations if im lucky 3x a month if that, we barely say I love you and she always says something about how some guy made a pass at her at work. Im done with playing games, I am a 30 year old guy who details cars I work hard when I get the jobs because I watch both our kids. I clean our place, dust, vacuum, do laundry. Im stressed im tired and I regrettably am starting to hate my wife. I feel unappreciated, and I just want everything to be like it was in high school. Simple.
She starts school in september for some medical courses, im happy for her but wonder what waits ahead. I dont know if I can do this again we have been on and off since high school going on 15 yrs now. Married for 3 of those I love my kids I wanna love her the way I did I wanna trust her the way that I did I dont know how to do that anymore. I dont wanna say we are non repairable, but my mind is telling me that . Im so confused on what to do I dont wanna hate her but she is not the girl I met she changed and her attitude has changed since she found out she could take the classes. I will update on how things are going if anyone is interested. Thanks for listening it helped a bit even if no one reads this it is nice to vent a little.
allforherallthetime allforherallthetime
26-30, M
1 Response Jul 3, 2012

First thing you've got to get out of your head is things being "as simple as they were in high school." Man, those days are done. You've got kids now and responsibilities, so it'll NEVER be like that again. <br />
<br />
Sounds like one of your main problems is an unfair division of labor. Your wife needs to carry her load and help you out with some of the house sh*t. I'm not saying you need to treat her like your maid, but you definitely need to divide some of the chores. If you don't get a handle on this situation now, it'll only get worse (just read some of the other stories in this section).<br />
<br />
I wish you the best of luck.