Men..what Can We Do?!?

To any men that might be reading this right now, I ask you to please hear me out and lets see if we can collectively come together on a potential purpose. I have read a lot of posts from my fellow brethren ( we are all men so i refer to each of you as a brother no matter your race or creed ) There are a lot of us that are unhappy, miserable, and there are even some that may secretly pray for death. Some of us feel as if we are stuck in a hopeless situation to where there is no escape. there are some that would love to get a divorce but due to your financial situation you can't. Plus if you look at the different state laws concerning child support, alimony, etc it leaves a lot of men in a state where they don't have a pot to **** in or a window to throw it out of. I know I haven't hit all the factors but I wonder truly, realistically and honestly. WHAT CAN WE DO!?!?! I understand that ever man's life and living situation is different but damn. I am a 31 year old African American Male that is a disabled vet. I served for 10 years and in 6 years I made it to the rank of SSG / E-6 which is not an easy task. I have been in the middle east more than the states in my 10 years of service and to be a disabled vet I have the skills of a high school grad but I have the drive and determination of a soldier. My married life fills me with a rage that surpasses all. I loved my wife and treated her better than my father treated my mother. I took care of her needs and some of her wants. I suffer from Severe PTSD ( Post Traumatic Stress Disorder ), Severe Chronic Depression due to war time experiences I have had a heat stroke and I have rhabdomyolysis ( which effects my muscles ). But I have a wife that can but won't cook and if she does its a boxed meal like Schwan's meals, won't reverence her husband and is a disappointment to me in every way. We live in a house in a great neighborhood and it would not be possible if it wasn't for my credit and my VA Certificate. I put her in this house because I feel that , that's what a husband should do, put his wife and children in a house. Well Guess what! This House feels as if it is my "Mausoleum". I mean damn when it comes to house work I cut the grass, wash the clothes so me, her and my son have clean clothes. Do dishes and I am always looking for a job. Guys look at our life's we live!! THIS IS NOT LIVING!! I believe in God and I know that we are suppose to have life and live life more abundantly because he said so. But What I want every man to think about is two things:

1.) The Law is not in our favor! But what can we do? Petition or something! If homosexuals can get all these damn rights then why can WE.

2.) What you deal with at home is it worth it? And actually this will tie back into the first question, WHAT CAN WE DO! I know there are some men that are staying because of their children or a child but check this out. Those very same children and that very same child see's what you think it doesn't. He or she knows that Daddy isn't happy. We come to this site and vent to our fellow Men, fathers, son, and brothers. But these issues....the anger..the resentment, the hate, the loathing is like a cancer and it is slow.

I have hope because of God and I desire to be a stand up comedian. I just don't want to deal with a bull$hit a$$ woman. I think that if we came together to figure out a legal and lawful way....we can do something. I would like to leave a link and I hope you check it out and I hope it makes you laugh it came from my heart and its for every man, father, son, and brother.

FroZone FroZone
31-35, M
5 Responses Jul 9, 2012

Maybe this explains why so many men are turning bisexual or gay

I understand your points but I'm sure men/women will never truly be equal. For example, there was a time where women was horribly unfavored for very long time.. Now, there is a strong women movement to balance this and I think it's mostly good. I said "mostly" good because they are now taking advantage of us... like many wife would say..<br />
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"Your money is my money. My money is my money"<br />
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I know all wife is not like that but just generalizing.

I don't know about America, but in India laws are becoming more & more cruel towards men. Recently Union Cabinet has come up with a proposal that Men will have to give half their property to their wives in case of a divorce. <br />
Plus we have the section 498(a) in which a woman can report against her husband that she is being subjected to cruelty and dowry harassment by husband and his family and the police can arrest husband's family members without any investigation. And this offence is non-bailable.<br />
In big cities men have become hapless victims to unscrupulous/cunning women who are misusing this law and becoming rich by harassing their husbands.<br />
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Though I may add that women in smaller cities and villages of India are still suffering silently, but the law which was made essentially for protection of those women is being misused by some cunning big city women and their parents.

Thank you FroZone and thanks for giving me something to laugh about today in your link, God knows I need it. I don't know why it has to be so damn tough. All I know is what I got saddled with is only marginally tolerable because I love our kid so much (but I aint having no more with her believe that!). You just have to find your personal "out" for it. After the years I realized that my father and mother simply were not into each other and when dad wasn't working he just spent all his time working on cars out in the garage or in the neighborhood working on other people's cars and she spent most of her time at church or hauling me and my brother around the neighborhood with her to visit people. My parents hardly ever saw each other and that is the ONLY reason they stayed together. I know that now. So once you realize it's not working and it's too hard or too late to leave, you have to make things work for yourself brother. You have a good thing going on with the comedy and I hope you keep it going. For me, my "out" is gaming and I've gotten good enough to help people develop programs, just can't get a job with it and am stuck with fast food work right now. Yeah she whines about me not spending much free time with her but she has her TV shows and facebook forums that she literally spends hours on and never comes in once to ask me about my games. We see each other at breakfast, dinner, and bedtime and that is good enough for me, because on those three occasions every day she has something to whine about. I am not in love with her, it was a mistake to marry her (I will never tell her these things but I do feel them), but I tolerate and financially support her as the mother of my little girl and if possible I am leaving once my child has left the nest. Frustrated1978 is right, it is all about staying strong.

The reason men dont get given a fairer deal is because we dont canvass as a group our politicians to change the unfavourable laws towards us.<br />
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Women have all these different groups which lobby hard. US men dont have that. Until we get our act together and work on lobbying our politicians and forming support groups for men we will always be served a shi..t sandwich.<br />
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Stay Strong & Good Luck

Frustrated1978,. Thank you for taking the time to read and respond. I think you are right! I think us as men should come together and do exactly what you stated in your response. I'm willing to start.