Amazingly Unstable

My wife is a mean, bitter person.  i have one child with her, a beautiful baby girl.  She has another daughter from a previous relationship that I love and treat as my own.  I consider myself to be a mild person.

I have a very good job - not rich! - but very well compensated for what I do.  My wife also works, but claims she hates her job.

We knew each other almost a year when we got married.  We have been married for less than a year at the time of this article.

Anyway, now to the point. Everyday - if not, at least every other day - my wife is happy as can be in the morning.  Loves me, the kids, life is great.  By early afternoon she wants a divorce.  By bed time, she is okay again.  It is absolutely killing me.  i cant stand the roller coaster.  The thing is , if she was my girlfriend and not my wife, and there wre no kids involved, I'd be gone.  Boom! Outta there.

Anyway, when she gets mad, she is downright mean.  name calling, viscious personal attacks, and more.  I dread leaving work because I am not comfortable in my own house.  I love the kids - whole-heartidly - but I am anxious to get out of the situation.

As an example, today she told me she is "done.  That's it. Done.  I want a Divorce."  Why?  Because i bought a $14 hat on Ebay.  Now I understand discussion larger purchases, but all this over $14?  I told her I have the cash on me - i'll throw it in the acocunt - but that is not good enough.  Just to fill you in, we are not hard up for money either.  $14 is not going to break the bank.  It will barely dent it.  So what is the issue?  And to boot, we talked about this already, and determined purchases under $100 don't require discussion.  So what the hell? I didn't get upset when she bought herself clothes, etc. 

This is a daily occurance - and everyday it is something else.  She demands she have access to my email and cell phone records as well.  Just for the record - i have never given her any reason to doubt me, or not trust me.  I have never flirted with, held hands with, talked to, etc. another female since I have been dating my wife.  Yet she treats me like a 5 year old male prostitute.  Yet there is always something i am doing wrong...

She is also prescribed medication which she refuses to take, because she wants to "get better on her own." ??  Seriously?  I don't know how much longer I can take it.

And advice would be appreciated.

Angryhusband2000 Angryhusband2000
3 Responses Jul 18, 2008

Been there, the biggest thing is the insecurity of your love. Flowers once in a while is great, but isn't going to cut it.

You've got to romance her and never stop. Call her during the day and tell her you just wanted to hear her voice

Hold her face in your hands and tell her " honey, have I told you how beautiful you are today? , then Honey have I told you how much I love you today?

Treat her like you did when you wanted to impress her enough to marry you.

Buy her "I love you" greeting card for no special occasion about twice a month.

Kiss her often, hold her and hug her. She is very insecure. It may take about 4-5months to convince her that you're not putting on. You will see a remarkable change in both of your behaviors.

eventually you won't want to leave the house for work because you guys wan't to stay in bed all day.

It's not easy, but you have to be loving, very nurturing and supporting right now!

Welcome to marriage. Sometimes I feel like I am in an insane asylum being married to my wife. She won't let me have a facebook account, but she has one and even cheated on me with a guy she met on there. <br />
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Friggin telling her this is enough bs only enrages her to the point where I think she has lost her mind with anger. Friggin I say, wouldn't it **** you off if I went to the bar every weekend with my guy friends? She says yes, but then she goes to the bars with her girlfriends because she is the one who needs breaks never me.<br />
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This crap only gets stranger and worse over time. My fear is divorcing her and she ends up with a loser assho|e that tries to mess with my kids. Best advice is to prioritize. Stay with her as long as you can for the kids, maybe split up when your kid is able to look out for herself more maybe in 5th grade or whatever. 18 would be best, but that is hell. Chances are she will end up cheating on you, wives are friggin monsters if you try to please them, honestly.........................................

Maybe you can videotape her without her knowing a couple of times and show her what she is really like and maybe suggest family counselling as it is important for her to hear no only how you are feeling but also the children (Age appropriate of course)....she sound a bit maniac depressent but it is sometimes hard to see what you are doing but maybe watching a few tapes may be the boost she needs, if not find out your options about leaving her and taking care of those kids!