Horrible Selfish Wife... Want a Way Out

Im in the same situation as you bro. I have married my wife for the past 4 years. dated for 3 years. If only i knew what will be coming i very much regret marrying her. The warning signs are all out when i first met her. shes having a baby with some older guy who used her as a **** buddy. then she got hit by some guy too. i pity her and let her stay with me. she has been a mental case saying her parents want to control her life. i thought life has been hard on her and i was out of love. in the beginning it was good but she had relapses and always seem to hurt everyone around her. she never cleans the house and messes her stuffs and never bother to buy food for me while ahe wants to be treated like a queen asking me buy this and that. i relented and her parents coaxed us to get married. my bor and mom knew instantly shes the wrong chapter but im too blinded by my love as shes giving me tons of affection then between her lapses of craziness. i thought i can take it. im a man and thoughy i can take responsibility. cut the long story short. i wasted my money time and effort while she gave nothing in return..shes selfish with her money and bought all sorts of rubbish for herself and enjoyment. Im really stupid thinking marriage can change her but she kept complaining. talking bad for my mum. shes ill.with cancer and cough and she calls her a witch and hated my best bro who she say was using me. in the end she met a ****** up boy 6 years her junior and now they have sex and calla each other baby. when i msg her she reply aloof and sacasticly. im really fed up and wants to divorce but i dun wan her to be beart brokened. She hides her affair from me and lied but i still found out. my bro say im hopeless and told me to kick her out. Our new house ia on the way. should i divorce or stay. right now im trying to keep fit and i showwd less affection to her.

lol dude I honestly feel like I wrote this. i have the same issue but I have some kind of thing in me that remains humble time after time of disrespect. I havent figured it out yet but eventually it wears out and you start looking for other things to make you happy. Have you tried talking one on one with her to see why shes like this? A good heart to heart talk can be helpful. No tv or anything and relay your feelings to her. If she really loves you she will change for you and acknowledge your feelings and I hate to say it but if she doesnt you cannot have that kind of strain on yourself. Its not healthy.

Thank you for sharing. Your ordeal is hopefully behind you. I believe your wife is a Borderline Personality at a minimum as my wife mirrors your wife and she is Borderline. You can't have a future with a Borderline except one of being very lonely. As a man we like to fix things but a Borderline isn't repairable without more luck and money than odds of winning in Vegas.

I was once with a creature like this. It was a dark and scary time. Never plan on putting myself in such situation again.

Dude, I lived with a chick for 4 years....she didn't do ****, never cleaned, picked up after herself, didn't share the rent, food cost etc. she even had the nuts to say she was hungry on a Saturday morning and waited till I got up to cook. What a waste of time and she was freaking lazy like no one I've ever seen in my life! Zero respect.

Wow... I could have written this. I am starting to think all women are inherently this way, which is why I am in my thirties and no where near marriage. If any of you meet a woman to the contrary (that is, a rational, reasonable, accountable, thoughtful, caring adult human being with a vagina) please email me.

Thank you to all the guys who have posted on this thread. It is quite therapeutic to know I'm not the only one who is trapped in a bad marriage with crazy woman. I have been married for ten years and have a beautiful ten year old daughter. Before and during her period my wife is a nasty, vindictive, spiteful, hateful and angry person. After her period, for around 10 days she is the woman I fell in love with. However she is so nasty for the other 20 days in the month I cant take it anymore. I've put up with it for many years and have tried everything to change her ways. I've stood up to her, argued back, tried to discuss things but she will not or cannot see any wrong in what she does or says. She will never admit she is wrong. Because of this we never talk about issues anymore. There is no point because she will never consider anyones point of view other than her own. She never apologies and will try to lay any blame on me. So over the last couple of years I decided that the best thing to do is to simply not say anything. When she rants and raves over the most trivial of things i don't respond. I just sit and listen or walk out the room. Now this has been hard. When someone is criticising you and calling you names you just want to lash out but ive taught myself to bite my lip. The main reason I do this is because my daughter has been witness to years of her vile comments and I figure that damage limitation is the best way to protect my daughter from any further mental damage. My wife doesn't care if my daughter can hear what she is saying. The other night we had a huge row where my wife ended up hitting me repeatedly (as she has done many times over the years. Yes I have hit her to but she has always stuck the first blow). The row was over the fact that my wife needed some help with a Word document. I said 'do i get a kiss in return' and she flew of the handle. Yes it really is that bad. I closed the living room door so my daughter couldn't hear. If course my idiotic wife then opened the door and my daughter heard everything. I went upstairs and the little angel was sitting on her bed sobbing. Seeing her like this just broke my heart - again. I haven't been the perfect hubby but she is a psycho. I could give you a thousand examples of crap over the years. I don't see my friends anymore because she would start arguing if I came home too late. However her 'too late' is everyone elses too early. I just can't be bothered with the hassle of explaining where im going, what im doing, who I was with blah blah. She hates the fact I work with women and i may actually be friends with them. She went ballistic when I once had a completely innocent text from a colleague. She accused me of having an affair with her. Once I plucked up the courage to take her to a works party. When I saw my work friends I gave them a hug. She went absolutely mental saying I fancied them etc. Idiot. Her new thing is that she hates the fact I go to watch sport and she resents the fact im at the match for a few hours whilst she is at home. Anyway, why dont I leave her you ask? Well I dont want to spend a day away from my daughter it would break my heart. We also have around 10k of debt that I could not afford to pay if I was living by myself. But I have a plan. The day my daughter turns 18 im gone. She can have the house I don't care. Im off and im going to find a woman I actually get on with and I will start my life again. Ok ill be nearly 50 years old but im hoping fate will give me a break and cut me some slack.

Thanks men. Misery loves company and it helps me know I'm not alone. I think my daughter gave good advice one time when I was particularly upset and she learned about it: build a support network of friends and family that will cheer you when she gets you down. Sometimes when you let your wife just stew in her own juices she will act better, communicate with her better side, even apologize. Chnaces are she actually knows or suspects deep inside she's wrong; don't let your reaction become her excuse.
That will keep you going for a while. Read through this column; it sounds as though there aren't so many good women out there just now. Try to live with it and develop a strategy for the various hellish scenarios that are likely to happen or have happened before. Don't let it get you down; tell yourself she's not worth it and -maybe- she will be one day Understand a little imperfection in yourself but don't give her the excuse of any major outburst. If you do apologize that time so she'll be able to see the problem is in herself. The whole world is making excuses for her; don't make any more but realize she is being brainwashed that women's problems are the fault of men.

I was the selfish and crazy wife and my ex made the mistake of letting me get away with it or storming out. As some have mentioned here, it is important to stand up for yourself - not because you are "the man in the relationship", but out of your own self respect. I lost respect for him because he never stood up to me and when he did, he was so angry and hurtful from letting it build up that he would yell at me at the top of his lungs and call me the worst names - I lost even more respect for him during these episodes because he was out of control of his emotions. So, my advice is to be consistently honest and stern when she behaves in a way that is disrespectful to you and your relationship, while still being loving towards her. Your life is too precious to waste with someone who doesn't contribute to your happiness - but it is a two way street.

Shouldn't there also be a "woman's side" of the story?
I mean.. why would all these women simply go berserk? There is no smoke without a fire.

Daaaamn.. Thats my situation the same way, except add my kids and her kid n makes it worse. Her kid has to be better and she always puts mine down.. I freaking tired of selfish woman to. I almost swear not a decent woman exist these days.. They all want to be like jerseyshore, and all this other crap. Im bout ready to quit myself.

Guys,

Seeing that this pattern is all over the world makes me want to share my story. I need advice too, but hear me out...My wife of 1.5 years has some of the same behaviors, but its gotten BETTER. Here's the story...

How it started: I met her at 29 when she was having biological fever and wanted to settle down. I also was looking to settle down and thought this woman was smart, fun, and since she went through the same upbringing (divorced parents, raised catholic, same ideas about life and kids and politics and money), we had a great chance.

Her behavior at the start was controlling, she'd demand I'd spent every minute with her (I mistook that for love), talked about her exes IN DETAIL (I reasoned that a lot of couples who want to be open share this). She got a job transfer 3 months after we met, and at the time I was unemployed (I'm an architect) so I was talked into moving for a future (after she basically said she'd give up the job to stay with me if that's what I wanted - love, right?).

A month after we moved, I proposed (5 months in total) and she changed. I kept finding stashes of photos of exes she kept, our communication stopped, she confided that she had lied about her past (her sexual past, she had a miscarriage with a guy who left her behind, and that alot of the things we had in common were lies). I was miserable in a new job I took to keep her happy and was overqualified for, and the drama spilt over when she read my work emails to a female friend asking for advice on what to do, how to open her up, and if I should stay. THAT blowup should have ended us, but I felt guilty for talking about us behind her back and stayed to make us better.

We got married about a year later, after more (but less frequent) instances of talking about her "long lost love", her friends bringing up more of her past in front of me, and her passive aggressive behavior of pouting or crying to get her way (pushing up the wedding, spending $$$$$ on it, etc etc). I loved her, and I still do, but I was staying in the relationship more for loyalty than for love at that point.

By the time we were married for a few months, I was a wreck. I had no confidence in bed (images of her old lovers stories were imbedded into my mind), I was sick of her selfishness (I changed jobs with no support from her, cause I needed to make more $$$ to make her happy), her family adored me but she badmouthed them. And I cut off friends she didnt like in order to make her happier. She treated me with little trust or respect pointing to the time I talked to that girl. I wanted to leave but we got pregnant (her pushing me to have children sooner than I wanted and cried daily until I gave in).

I was miserable. I gambled a bit too much, flirted with girls via email, and watched a ton of ****...anything to get my mind off our sex life and to have fun and get horny without cheating - hoping I would come back around while she was pregnant. She dug through my emails, my account statements, and my phone while I was out of town visiting my sick grandmother and found all of it (i wasn't trying to hide it). I came home to being stranded at the airport and threats of divorce. I apologized, took responsibility for my outlets, and sought therapy. The Therapist sided with me that my behavior was due to her behaviors, and I was not a liar, a cheat, or a gambler. (I haven't done any since - cept the **** :))

She told all of her friends, her family, my family, my friends all the terrible things I did. I am still living with my reputation of being gambler, cheater, liar in those circles and none of them knowing her behavior to cause them (cause she is the best person ever when in public).

HERE"S THE THING: I said **** it. I started fighting back, calling her out on everything, and basically told her I knew she didn't love me and that I wanted out. She IMMEDIATELY started to show signs of improvement. Its like no one ever told her she was an idiot before. She's a smart woman, and she still acts out sometimes (today she wanted a $1,000 lamp when we are saving $$ for our first home), I said no and she threw a near tantrum in the store. After an hour of explaining to me I get what I want ALL the TIME and she never does and that I yelled at her in public (I calmly said no - what a joke), she just let it go. She's realizing she's a complete loon.

MY ADVICE: Tell your wives off ALL the time with HARD TRUTH. You're the man, don't forget that. Eventually they'll get the hint or they won't, but at least you'll feel better about yourselves everyday cause you grew your nuts back. WE have the power. There are plenty of women out there who want a good guy who is a great dad. You are a commodity (there are just as many loon guys out there treating women like **** - yet they always get the great, sexy ones, dont they? Cause they have nuts)

I wouldn't trade the 2.5 years of drama for my little girl, ever. She's so beautiful and smart and she looks so much like me, it makes my wife jealous how much she laughs and smiles for me. I cherish her jealously, my wife realizes more everyday she hit the lotto and is even supporting a major career change I am going through, supporting me rebuilding friendships with those I cut off for her, and is talking things out more every time we have an issue. FIGHT BACK BOYS, FIGHT BACK. She'll either respect you or leave, its a win-win.

I hope you all find the right path, life is too short to compromise on what you need.

I see i'm not alone. I got married 13 years ago and have several kids. She's spent all our married life listening to her brothers and sisters (b/s) and her mum. They tell her what to do and how. Anyway, her mum passed away a few years back, and the b/s have been advising her how to do this and that. Of course, naturally, this is my life and my marriage, so what's it got to do with them. Since getting married, i have never had a good days sex. Sex has been absolutely crap. There is no affection in her. When i hug her, its like hugging a tree trunk. When we have arguments, its always been me trying to reconcile, even though its not my fault. She listens to her b/s, and they are a bunch of twats. The other day, we went shopping with the kids. I could see her attitude was turning baad, so i decided to walk slightly ahead. She got pissed off with this, and swore at me in front of my kids and public. I got annoyed, so i returned a few back and told her to go home. But, as she didn't have the house keys, she went to my parents. She came home a little later i got home. The next day, i get a call from my mum asking me why i behaved in such a way. So, i opened up and told the total truth about this lying selfish *****. My mum was shocked. My mum called her the next day when i was at work and gave her some back. Now, my wife is pissed why i had said what i did to my mum. But, its only the truth, and why should i look like the baddy anymore. Her b/s are so selfish also, when their mum was in hospital with cancer, none of them could give a **** about taking time off work or going to see her regular. When she died, they all managed to take about a month off work. But hey, who goes off to celebrate their daughters graduation a couple of weeks later, when their mum has died ? Yes, these are the selfish people i have to deal with, and i want to end my marriage. I'm not afraid of it anymore, as i want a good life, and bring my kids up well. This ***** won't, she's selfish. I should never have married a Pakistani women. Never never never never again. I used to think i'd bring shame to my family, but i think, now all is out in the open, they support me. Up until now, they've been on her side, and didn't know the truth. But, enough is enough and i've opened my mouth and told the truth. By the way, her older sister is divorced, and her other sister got divorced from her first husband, and the second husband nearly divorced her, but she begged him back. He was seeing prostitutes and going on chat lines. I want to shake his hand.

This is a good thread, I'm realizing that there is alot of good guys taking it on the chin for no reason known to me here. Where have all the good women gone....oops, did I say that out loud. I hate sleeping alone....sleeping not sexing...lol

check out taken in hand (google it). unfortunately, we do have certain tendencies as women and some things mentioned here are a big part of them. the bad part is that we are not taught to fight these and resist them to bcome better people. society "empowers" (emboldens) us to express them, to defend them, to railroad others with them. and that is what is wrong.

we need to be taught to be better than our base natures....but now religion is out the door, tradition is gone, and so all we have is our own selves and the diva celebrities we see and the fake idea of love on TV and in movies. no one believes in sacrfice, in putting others first.

we need to find a system to fix this.

the husband can either take it on himself, or find a wife who has been brought up religiously/traditionally so she will have internalized these things and know how to behave.

After 25 years, I could right you a book. My cup is now full, I tried all the coping mechanisms, drinking too much, absence, indifference, and hiding out in the man cave. There is no making this woman happy. So...call a spade a shovel and move on my friend. Someday someone will clue her in and you will not have spent 25 years with the wrong person. You are not a doormat my man !

hey guys any advice on leaving a women without being so caring of her feelings? Trust me i have good reasons to leave. I cant watch the movies i like or even go to the fuckn show without my wife making me turn my head because she thinks im gonna have sex with the movie screen!

My wife is just as selfish and crazy except not only does she not get along with my family, she cant even get along with her own family! She complans about people at church and quit going, she complains about people at work, nothing is ever her fault its always everyone else's fault she doesnt even know if she wants to be with me anymore. My youngest is 11 and I figure I will try to put up with the crazy ***** for 9 more years and then end it!

Some of these sound a lot like my wife. She has been a miserable ***** for the past decade of marriage. We have gone more than a year at times without sex. She refuses to answer any question I ask, if I sit down in the same room she gets up and leaves. She constantly curses at me and berates me in front of my children trying to solicit a reaction from me. She locks me out of my house when I leave. She has not worked one day since we've been married. She seldom gets out of bed before 10 or 11 am and wears pajamas all day. She gained about 60lbs after I married her. She feeds our children (age 8 and 5) cheezits for lunch, or I come home to a ransacked kitchen where the kids have attempted to cook themselves a meal. She talks on the phone constantly like 12 hours a day to her friends and family and her favorite topic of conversation is what a sorry *** I supposedly am, she talks bad about me on the phone directly in front of me telling lies to her family just to try to get a rise out of me. She has punched me in the balls while I sleep. She has thrown buckets of ice water on me to get me to go sleep on the couch. She cheated on me with a long distance relationship with some unemployed looser she went to high school with, and he came down to see her and they took my kids to the park and took pictures of eachother and drew hearts in the sand with eachothers names etc She came up with a plan to get rid of me. She stole 5 thousand dollars cash from my dresser (to hire a lawyer) that I had from selling a truck that I purchased prior to our marriage, she drained our checking account and I came home to an empty house. 5 minutes later I was served with a restraining order and forced to leave my own home with no where to go and had to sleep in my car at a truck stop. I wasn't allowed to even see my kids and my oldest boy's birthday was the next day. The restraining order had 30 claims against me that were entirely fabricated. With only 50 dollars to my name I had to work day and night and call in favors from friends to come up with enough money to hire a lawyer within the week. Two days before my court date to have the restraining order dropped I get served with divorce papers with a whole new list of claims against me that were utterly ridiculous (and some of them contradicted her claims on the restraining order). When is the date for the divorce hearing? Oh its immediately following the restraining order hearing, so I had 2 days notice to prepare. I got busy and came up with 19 notarized affidavits from reputable friends who not only disputed her claims, but were witnesses to a lot of other stuff, like my our one friend witnessed me trying to give her a hug when I was leaving for work and she acted very nice until I got close enough for her to kick me in the crotch. She claimed that I gave her an STD on her restraining order so I went and got a blood test the very next day and the results finally came back the morning of the hearing that I was 100% clean. A few of our mutual friends called me to apologize that she had told them that she was going to do this to me so that she could get full custody of the kids and move across the country to New York where she is from, but they didn't really think she was serious. It was all planned out to the day. She even pinched the side of her own boob and photographed the small little bruise she caused. Her lawyer took her to meet with the judge to get the restraining order and she had a full opportunity to sit down with this judge and tell him her side of things, now this is the same judge that has to be supposedly impartial in his judgement though I never had an opportunity to see him prior to our hearing. She called our children's elementary school and put me on a no contact list where I was not allowed on school property. When I called the school to get a copy of my son's medical records I was denied and told by the secretary that they didn't want anything to do with me and if I needed anything from them I would have to ask my wife. (No telling what they thought I had done). When my wife saw how prepared I was, she wanted to drop the entire thing, but her lawyer wouldn't let her, instead her lawyer got the judge to begrudgingly postpone the hearing until which time my wife decides to go forward with it. I moved back in, and I get treated like crap everyday of my life. She hates me with a passion. Yet she spends about 700-900.00 of my money every week. Yet if I want to eat, I have to get it myself. Why do I put up with it? I can't afford to start over, she would wipe me out. Oh yeah, all this happened last year. We had sex one time after that and she got pregnant, now we have 3 kids (and its been 16 months since we had sex.) She has now found new friends and she goes out with them like twice a week until 1 or 2 am and leaves me at home with the kids. She has started smoking again which I really dislike. I don't smoke or drink, i basically just work usually about 80 hours a week. She hangs up on me every phone conversation we have. She tells me that she wishes she would have left and how marrying me was the worst decision of her life. She has pulled a knife on me when I tried to hug her as she was washing some dishes, and I think she is totally capable of stabbing me in a rage because she looses control of her actions. She has never apologized for anything ever, and she plays the poor little me I have things so tough role with all of her friends because she likes the attention and pity. She also likes turning people against me by posting ridiculous lies on her facebook page, but if i comment to defend myself she will just erase my comment and block me. I am a shell of who I once was. I have forgotten what its like to be happy. But I cannot leave my kids with this person. I have to be strong and turn the other cheek daily for their sake. If I were to leave, then I would be abandoning them with no one to really make sure they are taken care of and that they know right from wrong. So I come home to a very dirty house. Stinky baby diapers, food all over the floor, dog mess, etc. and I just have to clean everything silently. I have the patience of Job, but I dream that one day when my kids are old enough not to be brainwashed by her, one day I will have saved enough money hidden away, that I can afford to leave and not live in a shack. That I can leave and buy a place nicer than the house we now live in. Like the movie The Count of Monte Cristo, I just dream that something good will one day happen and I can afford to get away and take the kids out of this hell hole as well. It sounds really bad, but sometimes I think that I wouldn't be at all surprised if she died, not that I would wish that on her, but it just seems like maybe God would say enough is enough if this is how your going to act towards others.

I been with this woman for six years we have two beautiful daughters 4 and 18 months, I have a daughter from a previous relationship that lives with me she is 9 now, she was 3 when I started this relationship, I been dealing with her self centered childnes attitude from day one, in the beginning I overlook the facts letting my infatuations for her lead the way that now I reegret, some how I have been trap in the role of being the bad guy, she had talk down bad on me to her family that everyone hates me, she had sound like the victim and continuously keeping making treats of suicide when I speak my mind about the selfish inmature personality that she have, she is everything for my daugthters, they love her some much, I don't want to split the girls apart, but things keeping going worst everyday, her needs and feelings are the only things that matter to her, she uses the fact that she have to deal with the kids and the house shores despite that she is not the greatest house keeper to be in a bad mood, long story short, I'm miserable with her, she sucks as a partner, she has no clue about anything that has nothing to do with soapoperas or cloths and shoes, I can't keep a conversation with her because she doesn't know what I'm talking about, if I say anything that hurt her feelings she talks about suicide, she had taked pain pills with alcohol to past out and disconect herself from the problems thaat she created.

here is the punch line, I'm not married to her,I own my own business and make very good money, she does not work, she depends on me 100% and then she still not getting the fact that I'm put up with her behavior. The only thing is keeping me from making a drastic descicion is my girls, I don't want to break them appart,

Mr. myrtlethyme are you still with your wife or have u managed to divorce her.

Please do tell us. My wife's behaviour is exactly the same as your wife. I really wanna know what action have you taken against your wife.

I also want to take some decision soon.

SOMEONE FROM PAKISTAN: here we go, for a second I thought you are married to my Wife, what the hell...........Seriously i cannot stand this woman and I just need to figure it out, what to do to her....but unlke you i always mentally punish her, if I'm not happy, why she should be.FULL STOP

Some sanity: admit to yourself that although you are a genuine soul, you just were lacking in some way to let your wife spin off so terribly. That's it. I went through many years of wondering all sorts of things...all of them bad...but just became stoic about the situation. I stopped blaming her and everything else and just decided to answer each question to friends, family and strangers (like you) that: "I guess I was an inadequate husband." Note I didn't say "BAD" husband. I was maried to a selfish, lying, duplicitous cheat...everyone knows this...and it infuriates the woman that she isn't getting a sadistic feedback from her cruelty. Still...it's the truth...I MUST have been inadequate in some way. Climb up onto the moral high ground and stay there...

Just stumbled over this site after I googled : "i am married to a horrible woman'. We ARE in the midst of a divorce (thank ye olde gods) but share the same house for half the week. We were supposed to make it amicable...but it isn't. With every snide, demeaning comment she comes up with I am ever more grateful that we are soon "done". It took me about 12 years to get the nerve to split up...the kids were minors. But it's all for the better. The long and the short of it is...as awful as I once felt...I am now breathing easier, am more posiitive about everything, and hopeful about the future. Although we are "stuck" thanks to the depressed housing market...as the inevitable end comes closer and closer...she gets more mean and vindictive...all to my eye-opening joy. WHAT a piece of work this woman is. GOOD LUCK to the next sucker.

Just to add some flavor to the discussion....



My wife is also controlling and a nightmare. Always starting an argument then complaining about arguing, consistently coming up with crazy expensive plans that if I don't instantly rave about cause an argument, whining about everything in life, using all her manipulative skills to try to get what she wants.



Complete selfish hypocrite. Only upside is that she is so crazy that it is funny.



Check it. I'm in the army, stationed at the language learning base in California. Everyone agreed that learning Chinese while being in the army is stressful?(Reasonably). My wife, unemployed while with me here in Cali, decided that living here was too stressful and decided to move back home. Even though I cooked the meals, cleaned the house, and did my job.



This literally happened. Saturday night at 10:00 pm after a training day that started at 4:30 a.m.



Me: Man am I glad today is over. I'm beat.

Her: I didn't make any dinner, I'm sorry, I'm just so depressed.

Me: Thats ok, I'll heat up the meal I made yesterday.

Her: I want to go back home and live with my parents. I just feel so unfulfilled here. I can't find a job, maybe I will there.

Me: Um. Yeah, we only have another five months until we move back home....

Her: So you could manage without me?

Me: Sure....



This is even better. For Christmas leave I didn't go home, not because I didn't want to see her but cause I have a test next month and want to prepare. Glad I didn't!



She drained the bank account early December. Because of having no money because she spent it all, I recommended that we have Christmas when I get back home, three weeks after Christmas. She agrees. I ask her to send me a package of Christmas goodies that her mom baked (we can't eat them all she said). Two days later she calls me, puts me on speakerphone and asks me if I am sending her a package. No, we are going to have Christmas in January, right? No money to even buy you something. Her mom starts in and I tell her to take me off speakerphone. I'm annoyed, she acts all innocent, and I tell her not to put me on speakerphone around her family. She gets mad because I don't want to talk to her whole family on speakerphone, argue argue argue hang up.



This is the whole point of the story though, the icing on the cake. My wife has long blonde hair, looks great. Well that night after she took a shower and thought that her hair was too tangled. So, she cut it. All the way down to the middle of her neck. She knows I like her hair, too. Well, liked.



At 200 a.m. I get a text. It says "BTW I chopped my hair. I want to be as ugly as possible so you won't want to be with me. I'm also going on a special get fat diet."



Oh, I'm planning my escape. The problem with these women is that they are crazy. That's it, just crazy. Basically they invent their own logic to justify inadequacies and mistakes rather then make healthy and rational decisions to improve.



We all married women with the emotional maturity of 4 year olds!

Your story is almost identical to mine. And her behavior is identical to my wifes. Life with a person like this is a living hell. Someone who can never be wrong, who can never look at any flaw they might have, who constantly looks at the negative side, who only shows her true self to their spouse.



Constantly analyzing me and talking down to me, turning it around so that I'm the source of her crazy behavior, I make her act this way.... Always critical of my kids - but hers can do no wrong.



It's hard to explain to someone how bad a situation like this can be. And I get tired of the people that say "well you should have known she was like this before you married" and "well why don't you just leave her". Romantic idealistic things to say, but reality is much tougher.

I hate to sound like a male pig, but some women are simply and totally insane. What I mean by that, is they are hopeless in reasoning with and saving. Most likely, a brainwashed princess, who generally only look favorably on things with selfish reasons. These types of women only change when things hit them head on in life. They don't appreciate people, until they are dead or gone. If they don't like someone, for example you now, they will not compromise themselves to make the relationship easier. The key sign of a woman like this is, the inability to apologize. If they can't say they are sorry, your doomed. If you don't have kids; GET THE HECK OUT OF THERE. I REPEAT. DO NOT PASS GO, JUST RUN FROM THESE SELFISH WOMEN. Maybe by 80 years old, after life has thrown them through the ringer, they will come around. What I'm saying is, women like this are a very long work in progress. They lack developed people and social skills others have by marriage time. The main skill, is compromise...



RUN...

I hate to sound like a male pig, but some women are simply and totally insane. What I mean by that, is they are hopeless in reasoning with and saving. Most likely, a brainwashed princess, who generally only look favorably on things with selfish reasons. These types of women only change when things hit them head on in life. They don't appreciate people, until they are dead or gone. If they don't like someone, for example you now, they will not compromise themselves to make the relationship easier. The key sign of a woman like this is, the inability to apologize. If they can't say they are sorry, your doomed. If you don't have kids; GET THE HECK OUT OF THERE. I REPEAT. DO NOT PASS GO, JUST RUN FROM THESE SELFISH WOMEN. Maybe by 80 years old, after life has thrown them through the ringer, they will come around. What I'm saying is, women like this are a very long work in progress. They lack developed people and social skills others have by marriage time. The main skill, is compromise...



RUN...

I don't understand why people stay and be so miserable. Either stay and deal with it or change your situation.

After reading everyone's comments about their experiences, I had one as well. I was with a woman who was selfish and a liar to boot. She certainly did a number on me for the first year of our relationship, well.....so called relationship. I would speak from my heart, it would turn into a fight and she was out the door. I took her back many times. In my eyes, there was noone else on this god forsaken planet that would ever stand up to her beauty wise. I realize now that beauty is only skin deep. I wish that I left a VERY LONG time ago. I've read a lot on the internet about depression and how to cope with depression. I realized that she was the one who was depressing me and my medicine was to leave. We had a time share together in Daytona Beach, FL that we went to twice a year, once in April and in July during my birthday. One night, she decided that she wanted to go out with a group of her friends who also had time shares down there. The day before this, we had a blow-up and some true feelings came out causing us not to talk for the entire next day. Well, to make a long story short, I asked her not to go out with her friends and to stay and talk about our relationship. She wanted nothing to do with helping. I warned her that I would take a bus home if she left. Well, she did and I wasn't there when she returned. It was probably the best decision that I have ever made. I miss her, well.....our good times which were not that many. I constantly think about her, who she's with, what she's doing blah blah blah. I have heard that time heals all wounds, but for me....time never heals. Suicide? It definately crossed my mind a few times, but I had to be strong and move on with my life because I have a ten year old who unfortunately went through my relationship with me. Some women just plain SUCK!