Well this just takes the cake. I've been married to my wife for 2 1/2 years and we have a one year old daughter. We fight constantly. The only time we don't fight is when I decide not to fight back and just take the abuse. It's just loads of fun being married to this horrible witch. She's lied to me about several things things but yesterday was the topper: she told me she has genital herpes and has for years! She said she didn't want to tell me because I would 'judge her'.  WTF??  We had all the talks while we were dating about pasts and such and all the questions were asked - but she just lied about everything! She admitted a couple months ago that she had an abortion when she was younger, and that she 'dated' (thats read f***ed) a married man for nine months at one point. These are things that I could probably have dealt with had she been honest, but she just lied about it all. So know I don't know what else there is lurking waiting to come out. She's never happy, always belittling and criticizing me to no end. I work full time make about $50K. Not great but it pays the bills. She stays home. She constantly calls me a loser becasue I don't make enough money. So now I go to school at night to try and get a higher paying job. You'd think that might garner some support or assistance from her but no way - if I don't do exactly half of the the housework she becomes enraged and turns on me. It's a living hell. Like being chained to a rattlesnake. I love my daughter and want her to have a father. Thats the only reason I'm here. I'm starting to think that thats a big mistake because now I fantasize about how great it would be to just backhand her as hard as I can. I'll never do it - I don't want to go to jail, but sometimes I think that's what she is trying to get me to do. She'll be in my face screaming and cussing at me and shove me (she even hit me in the face once) she screams and taunts and tells me I'm not a man, and come on tough guy etc... I don't know how much more of this crazy mean horrible person I can stand.

beatendown beatendown
4 Responses Nov 25, 2008

Your wife is abusive. There is absolutely no excuse for this. If it were you treating her this way you would be in jail right now. Get surveillance installed in your home, document everything, then get ready for the divorce. She will be considered unfit by any sane judge and you will have custody of your child and YOU will call the shots and have absolute control of your life again. Get on it and don't back down.

next time she hits you and it gives you event he slightest scratch that you can show for it call the cops. get a record on her. <br />
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stop torturing yourself, that is not good for your doughter either. <br />
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start preparing for a divorce and decide on it with a clear mind.

Sounds like you're doing everything you can and should get credit for it. Good for you for not resorting to violence. Next time she hits you, I suggest calling the police - except they'd probably arrest you. Maybe try using discrete cameras that catch her abuse of you, then if you do divorce, you'll have evidence that she's an unfit mother. I recommend keeping a diary as well with specifics - including dates, times, and incidents. Great if you have witnesses as well. Good luck.

I understand how you feel. It also happened to me a few times, when I have a thought of hit my wife as hard as I can. Once I end up hit the dashboard of the car, second I hit the drywall, and a few times I just have that thought of hurting her. That because she pushed me to the limit. but I still can control my self , knowing that I don't want to be put in a jail. A woman like this is worthless, but the problem is we have kid that we love and we don't want to separte with them. That's my problem too. Live will be beautiful if we live without those damn *****, if we don't have a kid to think about. That's the dilemma.