I Hate My Wife

It is an understatement to say I hate my wife. When we first met she was so sweet and caring. We got along great. I enjoyed going out of my way to make her happy and I would like to think she enjoyed making me happy. Now that couldn’t be further from the truth. Every thing must be all about her and to hell with my feelings or me. My life revolves around trying to make her happy. The sad part is nothing I do is good enough or done to her liking. I know this because she tells me constantly. She is a total obsessed neat freak, but yet does nothing as far as cleaning. I spend a large part of my day cleaning our house and cleaning up after her, but to here her talk she does everything and I do nothing. On top of that we have three dogs that live inside that I only wish I got treated as good as. I have to walk them, clean up if they make a mess and if they have an accident in the house it is up to me to clean up. I have begged her to put them outside because she will not help with them nor will she let me discipline them. The only way I can punish them to her standers is to tell them no or to lightly smack them on the bottom which does not work. When they bother her I must drop what I am doing and make them sit in my lap so they won’t get in her way. I also sleep on the couch now because there is not enough room in the bed for one of the two Chihuahuas and the miniature Doberman and her. When she goes to bed she yells at me about every 30 mins and let her they are in the house and in my sight. I must also let her know that the heating vent beside the couch is in place correctly as she fears the teacup Chihuahua will fall in the vent. Also we cannot use the front door any more because on one occasion it wasn’t pulled to and blew open and now it must be locked latched and have to vases placed in front of it. Then there is our sex life or the lack of one. We can only have sex when she wants to which is next to never, and it is all about her and what she wants. The lack of sex is becoming less of a problem as has gained about 70 pounds. I used to use work, as my escape from the hell that is my life but cannot for two reasons. The first is I was laid off about a month ago due to company downsizing and two when I did have the job she would call me ever 20 mins demanding I drop what I was doing and talk to her, and there would be hell to pay if I couldn’t due to the fact I had a job to due. Once one of the women called in because one of her children was sick and I went in to work to cover for her. From that point on I was accused of sleeping with her and constantly told that I treated her better than my wife. After along day of being chewed out over everything when I have the displeasure of being around her I must listen and act interested in what she says. She actually tells me that. “Even if you don’t care at least make me think you do” and to let her know I am listening she asks me to repeat back what she says. So help me god if I can’t repeat it back verbatim. Then on the other hand if I find interest in something or have a story to tell she will stop me about half we through and tell me she’s not interested or she just doesn’t care. That drives me crazy. After being laid off I spent all day cleaning the house and cooked her dinner. I was hoping that it would make for a good evening. I wasn’t even looking for her to kiss my *** or even say thank you. Just come in and eat and go to bed would have been ideal. Nope she came in and picked apart everything I did, although she did eat the food I cooked (imagine that). Oh she doesn’t cook either or if she does it is just enough for her and I can have some of what’s left over. Then there are her parents. I can really do nothing right in there eyes. I know because there is always some smart remark from her mother how nothing is done right or how it should be done another way. I came home from work a few weeks ago to her mother decorating our house. Making it look just like her house, which is nowhere near how I would like my house to look. After she left my wife asked me how I liked it and I told her I wish she would have asked for my input first, and how I did not appreciate her going through my things. As I caught her looking through the drawers in my desk I have my LCD TV hooked up to my Xbox 360/ computer, because I am not allowed to play it on our projection TV in the living room that I paid half on because she cannot watch what she wants too if I am using it, and because she refuses to watch TV in another room. I know what you are thinking why don’t you just go play it in another room. If I do that she gets mad because I am not in the same room with her. That’s the ****ed up part. If you have read this far you must be thinking she hates me. Hell that’s what I think, but I must either be in contact via phone or txt message or in sight of her. She flips out if I go one of three places (which if I go somewhere it is one of these three) My mothers, My sister and brother-in-law which he is one of my best friends or my friend Mike who I have known for almost 20 years and consider him my brother. It is hell to go anywhere, I must get permission, and if I do she is calling before I get there with some reason I must rush home or if I am not back when I say I am there is hell to pay (if I say I be back in an hour and a half and come back in an hour and forty five mins she will ***** about it for the rest of the night.). As for her she tells me when she is going somewhere, which is cool because I would rather her be gone. Something else I should mention is that we cannot have any glass dishes. She has a phobia about them. All the dishes must be plastic. If we drink out of a can drink it must be crushed in the middle on both sides or it bothers her. Oh and my personal favorite, she is terrified of twist ties. Like bread bag twist ties. They are not allowed in our house. If we buy any food with them on the bag they must be taken off immediately, and thrown away. I could go on a lot longer but I will finish with this. We just had a beautiful daughter. I am actually writing this from the hospital room. I thought this might salvage our shell of a relationship but it was a novelty that has already worn off. She delivered by C-section so I have spent the last 3 days waiting on her hand and foot and taking care of my daughter (which has been an absolute joy as I hope she will love me for a while before my wife makes her hate me too). Anyway her father called today and said that he looked in the window of our 2005 civic and said that it has been awhile since the inside has been shampooed and that I better do it before the nurse walks us out because if she see the car like that she will probably call DFACS and have her taken from us. I spent hours last Friday working on the already clean car so it would be up to my wife’s standards, and that is the comment I got. I hate her inbred mountain fanatical religious borderline retarded family (no **** I think she is the only one with a high school diploma and some college under her belt.). Since I was not raised on the mountain, am college educated, believe gays have the right to marry, think everyone should be treated equally no matter what their race, color or religion and do not go to church I am a bad person. I really think I am going crazy.

Igobyecho Igobyecho
26-30
8 Responses Mar 18, 2009

You have to do one thing: Get a BACK BONE!, you teach people how to treat you!, say no to her lazy ***, say no when she demands you do something, don't clean her mess if she complains remind her she DID the mess. You said "It is hell to go anywhere, I must get permission" how old are you? 10 is this your mom? NO, next time tell her your going to your sister's and if she says you can't, tell her you are not asking for permission and just leave and visit your sis. Sorry but you are pathetic, you need to say NOOOOO! more often, I dont think you need a divorce you just need to show her that you are not going to take her *** anymore. Good luck

I hope you don't have kids. Your life sounds like hell to me. You need to divorce her now!

Believe me, I'm on your side in this. What you describe sounds like hell.<br />
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Except, Hell itself will be a lot worse. I can't counsel you to stay in a situation that's driving you crazy, but I can encourage you to find ways of separating yourself from this lady's extreme behavior, and don't be held hostage by her over-bearing demands. Your wife is spiritually corrupt, and only the power of Jesus Christ can effect any real change, (and even then there's no guarantee.)<br />
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You might want to consider Him yourself, friend, and not try to go it alone. I foresee a long and arduous journey for you, and you'll need a Friend, (one Who sticks closer than a brother.) Try Him and see. "Oh Taste, and see that the Lord is good!"

Wow, your wife actually makes mine look "nice". Get out as fast as possible. People never change and she'll be like this until her dying day.

RUN, you are not a man, you have been turned into a slave, flee, honestly. If you were in another country U.S. special forces would be sent in to liberate you from your captive.

DIVORCE

You should have never had a child with her. Get divorced! Her actions speak louder than words. Your wife treats you like crap and disrespects you all the time. She does not love you and you have to come to terms with this. Getting divorced is hard but you will be happy eventually and you can rebuild your life. Just try to make sure you are always in your daughters life. <br />
Honestly your wife also seems mentally ill or to have very sick and unreasonable phobias. I do not think by her actions or mental state she will respond well to the "Nice Guy" parenting and relationship conversation. Coming from the mountains your wife probably thinks you are not a tough manly man aka redneck, wife beating, beer swilling thug.<br />
If you two can go to counseling and she agrees to go maybe your marriage is fixable who knows. She needs to become caring, loving, and respectful and if she can't you deserve better and to be happy.<br />
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Good Luck

Do some research on parenting styles and see for yourself which are good, bad and ugly. This could be helpful in the ways you two treat each other also. You wife should be pleased you seemed to care so much about the issue. Print some things up and talk to each other about how you can work together instead of against each other. Tell her it's because the kids deserve a home with parents that can get along. Show her research done by professionals if you have to, to get it through her scull that your marriage is at stake and this issue is very important to the well being of your family. Tell her if you can't talk about it relationally, the marriage will keep going down hill. Don't take it personal if she feels she hasn't the time. Ask her to schedule it in because it's important to the well being of your marriage, but please be prepared because sometimes we think we know it all. The print out's would help at this point, to sort of back yourself up. Look for Journals and things like you were writing a research paper on the subject you feel is important. If she's got a brain she'd listen. Most wife's would be excited to see this type of caring attitude from there man, some problem solving coming from the male counterpart is just what we'd like. Instead of the put downs, and by the way we never know where they are coming from if you don't get down and dirty with the issues you really need to talk about. Go for it, type in parenting styles and get to learning. It should help. Best of luck!