Where Did All This Glue Come From

I hate my wife.

It's official, if I'm in here writing this. I find myself flipping her the bird when her back is turned, and yelling my litany of complaints about her behavior in the car while driving away from yet another insane self-indulgent excuse for rational behavior on her part.

She is stupid. Or ignorant, which is worse because that means she's deliberately being stupid. She can't solve problems. "No can do" is her answer to the tough problems of life. "No can do" really means "no will do," but she doesn't even concede that she can solve problems. She can't make decisions, never mind good ones. We have fallen completely apart financially as well as emotionally. I find her revolting. Why? She's addicted to worry, to coulda-shoulda-woulda thinking, to assumptive behavior, to wishful thinking (as opposed to dealing with reality on its terms).

She can't handle change. Or the unknown. No vision. No imagination. Just the "now." God forbid one has to walk out the front door and have to deal with something other than sameness and the predictable.

We've agreed to divorce, but guess what (no can do): she can't find a job. Sure, it's a bad environment for finding work, but guess what: one has to try. Assumptive thinking: "unemployment is so high, how can I possibly get a job?" No can do.

She, like me, needs to get an apartment, live independently (no can do): "how am i supposed to pay for an apartment if I can't get a job?" She's never looked for a place to live because she can't imagine having to work for a living never mind having to change the current, status quo situation.

She can't solve problems. She can't make a decision to save her life. She ******* drives me crazy and I can't wait to cut her loose.

Ah, but the glue: there are kids. They've been what's kept us together (read: me from running, not walking, from this marriage), and it's a powerful sticky thing, that.

I hate my wife.

ThePragmatist ThePragmatist
46-50, M
1 Response Feb 27, 2010

I agree with you in every aspect. Whenever my wife starts acting up and ****** me off to the point that I want to stand over the stove and blow my head off, I come over to this forum (my solace) and read about other people (schmucks) like me who got suckered into marriage. I think you can take any poor guys post on this forum and pick 3 of the 5 things their wives do and it will fit your own situation (someone just said that in another post). My wife is so astoundingly stupid and can't think 5 minutes in front of her face, let alone a week or a month or god forbid, a year. She sends every penny she makes to her daddy who hoards it for her and spends what I make on designer clothes and crap, she's a pot addict, she started having an affair just before we got married (I don't know if she's had affairs before that) and continued with it while we were on our honeymoon. My expectations of her have dropped so low that if I walked home one day and saw her being gang banged by a bunch of guys, I wouldn't be surprised at all. She refuses to admit that our marriage has issues and says all marriages are like this and tells me I should consider myself lucky that I don't have a high maintenance wife. Due to some cosmic event, I have been blessed in one way: we never went to the court to register our marriage and technically/legally we are not even married (and I never intend to make that trip to the court), so I plan to use this to my advantage at the opportune moment. Revenge is a dish best served cold. Luckily I don't have kids and plan on walking out whenever it becomes unbearable for me and I have enough proof to justify a walk out.