STUPIDITY

I CANT BELIEVE HOW STUPID AND TRUSTING I AM. I SEE IT , NOW AFTER 3 YEARS! WHY COULDNT I SEE THE SIGNS BEFORE???? MAYBE CUZ THE KIDS DAD PUT ME THROUGH SOOO MUCH, WHEN THIS ONE CAME ALONG, AND HE WASNT ALL FINE, AND HE WAS SO SWEET, I THOUGHT HE WOULD BE FAITHFULL. HE LOVED ME SO MUCH, I KNOW WHEN HE SAID  I HAVE HIS HEART , HE MEANT IT, SO..Y? IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE TO ME.  Y DIDNT HE JUST LET ME GO? ALWAYS SO INSANELY JELOUS, COULDNT EVEN GET A TATTOO, CUZ HE DIDNT WANT ANYONE TOUCHING ME?? WHAT THE HELLLL!!!!!!!!!! UGH!! I HATE MY SELF FOR ALLOWING THIS SHITFACED ******* TO HURT MEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!