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Feeling Better These Days.....

last time i was here i talked about hating myself.  i really felt this way.  i felt like i was a waste of space.  I'm feeling much better these days.  Ive done so much recently.  decided to go back to school.  changed my hair.  started allowing myself to be selfish (buying any and everything that i want).  and most of all started singing lessons (couldn't sing my way out of a paper bag, but really enjoy singing).  all these things sound so petty, but they really all make me feel much better.   i don't hate myself the way i did a year ago.  i can laugh and actually have fun again!
blknurse blknurse 26-30 3 Responses Mar 15, 2012

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I can't sing, but I'm a DJ...so I know how powerful music can be to making a person feel good!... I hope you're feeling better these days?...:)

Its been so long since I wrote this. I am glad you commented, it caused me to revisit this post. I have had so many ups and downs since this post. I am still working on self love and self acceptance. But all in all I do feel better most days.

Hello blknurse...I'm glad to hear things seem to be better!....the key is to focus on the positives and never give up, know matter how hard that may be some days!

The singing lessons don't sound petty to me at all. I run a huge, 500+ member community drum circle which is made up of about 90% novices from under age 10 to 93 years old (!). Singles, couples, entire families get together for recreational music-making three times a month.<br />
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Here is an brief excerpt from something I wrote on the subject that you may appreciate:<br />
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"As recorded music first became accessible... people stopped singing in their homes and while they worked. People who sang for its own sake... for their own enjoyment... heard voices like Caruso's and became embarrassed at the sound of their own voices. I find that sad. That kind of thinking has become ingrained in our culture. Our society makes it very clear to our children who should be playing music or sports... who should be drawing or dancing... We're here to achieve not to enjoy."<br />
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...in other words... JUST SING! :-)

thank you so much for your response! you make such a great point. i was always raised to stay away from music because i didn't have the 'talent'. i am no longer taking lessons but it felt so good doing something i wanted to do for a change.

Cool :)