Depression

I hate who i have become i remember when i was 11 years old and not a thing worried me, sure i would fight with people that were supposibly my friends but hey thats life. everything changed on April 11 2001 My father had gotten into a accident that was the last time i would hang out with him. The last time someone would say i love you your perfect the way you are. dont worry about your mother she love you, your sisters are just jealous thats why they dont want to hang out with you. The outings i had with him went out the window as my life went wit him. I became depressed annoyed at life, Saying why him why my father the onlyone who loves me. Anger made me hate everyone, not letting anyone close did not ever want to lose someone like that so i became a loner. Looking back at everything i missed the dances, prom, graduation no one would go i would say whats the point i have no friends i have no life. No one missed me, my mother was not going to go. My sisters date night was that day. I had no money to buy the stuff because i was working to pay for my lunch at school because i was old enough for a job, old enough to afford stuff by myself. Between school supplies and lunch money for me was tight theen the clothes, i could not afford it so that day, the day i was supposed to be happy the day of my graduation i stayed in my room crying my eyes out, Depressed at life and myself. I regret doing that i hate myself for it letting them win making my life impossible. and still they wonder why i refuse to visit them everytime i see my sisters i hate them for what they made me do, My childhood i never had one. Had to grow up fast. Still they wonder why i would run away from house.Now here i am age 20 with no friends, always in my house stuck inside depressed god i hate myself for what i have become
ConfusedGirl101xxx ConfusedGirl101xxx
18-21, F
May 5, 2012