Back Here Again...I've been better...
But I guess that was just a fluke.
I'm feeling so hopeless and tired again, and it's my fault.
....This is a place of odd comfort for me...when I am like this, it can't get much worse.
So it's safe.
Being happy isn't safe.
I don't want to be happy and I'm tired of trying.
I'm tired of trying to get better.
I never stay better.
Why should I trust myself when I always let me down?
Why should I try when it always comes back to this, the exhaustion, the self-loathing, the sadness, the self-disgust?
I hate being me, I hate it.