What On Earth Was I Born For?

I don't understand myself. I'm a jerk, I'm dumb, I have no life, and I'm delousional. I'm not easily likable, people are mean to me everyday. I cry every night, but it doesn't matter because nomatter what happens to me nobody, and expecially not myself, cares.I won't amount to anything. Why I was born, no reason, fate just made a big mistake. Ten reasons why:
1. Looking back at my life, most of the things I've done were ruining people's lives.
2. Everyday all I ever do is try to do something I want to do. Doesn't work, happy endings don't exist for me.
3. Look at this post. CRAP ME!! I am just sitting here like an idiot feeling sorry for myself!
4. I am mental
5. I look in the mirror and all I see is the girl who can't do anything.
6. I am just not that smart. I have the IQ of a bird.
7. Majority of the things on earth I don't like.
8. I'm not a people person and I'm socially akward (not online though). I just can't fit into this world.
9. If I were ever acting 100% me I'd be 100% crap.
10. I am a failure at life.
There. I'm almost 100% sure I wasn't suppost to be born. I was a complete disaster.
P.S. Commentors, hate if you want, it's just proving my point.

DewDropsontheGrass DewDropsontheGrass
13-15, F
2 Responses May 20, 2012

I have the same experience like you. I keep asking myself what if I wasn't born, wouldn't my family be happier. Still going through it. I think we can get through this together.

(: We will. Thanks I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels that way.

Judging by your ex<x>pressions I'm guessing you are from the UK? Spent some time there. I found the Brits to be generally funny and SMART. Your introspection gives away your intelligence even if it self-depreciating. <br />
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First off, your too young to be a failure at life. That's something left to old folks and even then, not many can claim that prize. Second, you've got to stop looking at what you can't do and focus on what you can. No doubt there are some things. For one, you can write. Clearly you were 100% to be born, that is a fact. When I was your age, I was "socially awkward", very shy. I grew to teach and be able to speak in front of large groups. It happens. You are not mental, your brain is flying a mile a minute. Got to go slow or you'll drive yourself nuts. The brain is like a muscle. It can be overused, get tired and then not function correctly. I use to compete allot. Before a competition, I would be so wound up I wouldn't sleep well. It made competing awful. I got control of this and would then kick ***. Life is about learning, learning about ourselves, what we are good at and how we best function. The more you figure it out, the more fun it gets. Go easy and if you have any questions, please feel free to ask!

Actually I'm not from the UK but I hang out with alot of people from there. Thanks though! You gave good advice! (:

After reading your other post I figured that. Stupid friend. Listening is an art too few people posses. The Chinese have a saying, "the wise learn from the fools, but the fools don't learn from the wise." There was one thing I forgot to say, you have a sense of humor, another sign of intelligence!

Thanks (: