Who I Used To Be....

Before I met him, my confidence was sky high and now it is low to the ground. Although he says he loves me and says I am pretty, the hurtful words that I am a low standard has affected me to my soul. I go out shopping to leave with nothing and cry as soon as I get to the car. I want to feel sexy again. I need to feel like I am the most beautiful to someone, instead I feel so unpretty. The women he talks to are beautiful and such which makes me feel like I am not enough. I think how easy it would be to end this pain by putting a bullet to my brain. But I have beautiful children who need me so and they give me the strength to get up and go. Change is a coming next year for sure because I am seeing myself out the door. The weight will go as the happiness enters and this will happen before next winter. To all the women who are in my shoes, we can conquer and overcome this abuse. Society says that we should be thin but I am not now but will be again.
I am just tired of feeling like I am less then because a man says that I am.
amethysthm amethysthm
36-40
Dec 14, 2012