What's Wrong With Me?

As far as I can remember, I've felt different then everyone else... As I grew older I quickly started to grow more aware of it... And now... I feel as that I'm not just different, but rather... That something's wrong with me.
I've come across issues that I've realized I have, and I'm having a hard time accepting them... Overall I think a big problem of that is my inability to know what my own emotions are.
Today, I came home from work to see that my mom had moved my boxes out of my room to the basement... I couldn't stop my emotions from overflowing and taking a hold of me (as usual).
That was my room... A place where I can leave my possessions and feel safe. Myself and my belongings were well protected, despite my occasional paranoia...
But I suddenly felt as if my protective walls were nothing but an illusion. I became insecure and afraid of my own overpowering emotions. I couldn't control them and my frustration seemed to make everything worse, until it spiralled into a mess...
I hated feeling like that! My mom was only helping me and I had no reason to feel like that. I'm sure I hurt her when she saw how much her actions effected me... She was only trying to help and I couldn't even show an ounce of appreciation.
Now she thinks I have trust issues and that I may be a hoarder... But I myself can't even figure out what happened...
It took me hours to calm down, and even now I can feel small traces of those feelings resurfacing.
I don't want to feel this way! I'm a pathetic, shameful disgrace! Even now, I feel like I couldn't properly write out my feelings...
My mom and my best friend can't understand what I'm going through, no matter how much I try to explain it... I don't even fully understand this myself...
It's not the only time I've felt this way and this isn't the only thing that's happened to me... It's simply something that happened to me today... Something that's eating me away from the inside... It's pathetic.
What is making me like this? Why do I have to feel this way? Why am I like this?
I have this terrible sense of worthlessness... I hate who I am... What's wrong with me?
Guttersnipe Guttersnipe
1 Response Jan 10, 2013

Your are neglecting how important you are! infact God loved you SO much that he came as a man to pay for all of your wrongs! focus on Jesus who loves you my friend!
Isaiah 41:10
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
peacewithgod.jesus.net <- God does amazing things through this website, please check it out!!
I have already prayed for you <3