I hate myself because I wanted to be a basketball player but God made me the smallest in my family. I'm the best ball player in the family too. Everyone that's seen me play says man if you were at least 5'10 you would make it to the league. Oh well God only made me 5'5. I'm black but have a small ****. Puberty hit me REAL late and I still hope it'll kick in and make me taller and have a bigger ****. I mean no girl wants a small boyfriend that also got a small ****. Even Asian females. That's why I'm a 19 going on 20 virgin. I never had a girlfriend even though I've tried. I just always get the UGLY girls that like me. Why not 1 girl I like. But moving on I had a scholarship to prestigious Regis University but I gave up on school cuz I hate school even though I had a 3.4. My mom I know hates me for that cuz our relationship which already sucked got even worse. She always did say you never did show me affection you was "hatched" Well I got kicked out at 19 and moved in with grandma but got kicked out there for smoking weed in her basement. Yea my whole family got on me for that understandably so but my whole life I always get so angry when I'm told what I've done wrong even if I know I'm wrong. At night I can't sleep cuz I think about all the times I felt embarrassed or I just want to talk to someone but even with this new iPhone I have no girls or anyone to text or talk to. So I sit in bed with tears of complete anger and hate at myself just wishing I could die and get this ****** life over with. Even my older brother called me a piece of ****, hell even my boss who barely knows me called me a waste. Yea I know I am but there's nothing I can do about it cuz I'm too much of a punk to kill myself and doing anything else drastic would just make me a ******* bum..And though my little brother doesn't know I'm jealous of him of his height of the fact everyone loves him and girls dig him too. Maybe that's why I hate him sometimes for no reason, I wish I was him. I don't know, all I know is the sooner I'm dead or filthy rich where I don't need to worry about anything the better. Sincerely crybaby ************ who shouldn't be complaining about anything
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 17, 2013