Sometimes I Watch A Film...

and I get so annoyed with the main character that I start shouting at the TV and have to break the DVD (I don't have blu-ray capability yet).

Recently, it dawned on me, that if my life were actually some kind of Truman Show-esq joke and that my every movement, action and thought were being filmed then I would be one of the most irritating, self obsessed and loathsome characters ever conceived.

I guess I have quite a strong moral compass, yet I understand that sometimes, people make mistakes. What is most important is to learn from them and not make them again. Sh!t happens sometimes.

I can apply that logic to other people's actions. I know plenty of people who have made mistakes similar to mine, and whilst plenty of people will happily play judge, jury and executioner, something in me can see how easy it can be to slide into an 'alternate' reality. I may not approve of what they've done, I may not fully understand why they've done it, but I don't sit in judgement of them.

Why then do I treat myself my a completely different set of rules? Why is it every time something happens that is not even in my control but can have a bad effect on one of my relationships with people that I am so hard on myself? Why are my expectations for myself so much higher than for those of other people?
dixieg dixieg
31-35, M
Jan 24, 2013