Don'T Know What To Do

I feel so lost and confused with the way my life is going. I know what I want in life, but I don't think I have a chance in the world of getting any of it. Every attempt I make at improving myself just seems to go wrong somehow, someway no matter what I do. I want to have a real life with a job that helps me out, and a family that supports me. I want to know what love is and to graduate from college so that for once in my life I can feel smart and not some idiot who seems to be destined to work at a fast food place the rest of my life and to have no friends, and no life at all. I hate who I am and who I seem to be. I hate feeling lost and confused about life and everything else. I hate being in my thirty's and having never experienced love at all. While everyone else around me gets married and has families and I seem to get nothing! I've never even been kissed and that is sad because i think about it more than you can imagine. To make matters worse I am fat and ugly, with adult acne that never goes away. I went to college to be a teacher and was kicked out of the program because I have to much anxiety and couldn't stand in front of the class and teach lessons to them so I failed my internship. They told me to get help but i can't afford it and they told me that I do better at helping others more than teaching them so they transferred me into a Human Service program, but I feel like I can't help anyone until I can help myself, but I don't know how. I don't have insurance or money for it. I am having trouble with my classes because I know I am not as smart as everyone else in the class, so I procrastinate on my homework because I am so scared that I won't do it right or that I will fail the assignment. Help I don't know what to do and where to go. I just want to belong somewhere. I wish I were smarter and understood things better!
canttouchthis76 canttouchthis76
36-40, F
4 Responses Jan 31, 2013

we all live in 'wild' place if you want survive u need to believe your self and dont regret the past , u need to plan for future .....peace

You are not a total looser who lives their lives the way that everyone hate

no mo dont feel like that God made you for something not nothing you are someboody hold your head up you not ugly you are pretty talk to me anytime i can b your friend I CARE

Alright, you can make things better. I recommend you start exercising slowly. Start with walking then graduated to part time jogging (jog a while then walk and vice versa). Do push ups as well. Quit eating junk food that causes acne. Drink lots of water and no soda.

Look up Jack Lalanne on youtube. He gives out tremendous advice.

One last thing, read the book "Power of the Subconscious Mind" by Dr. Joseph Murphy. It will show you that the way you think will manifest into the way you are. The book will tell you how to change that.