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Oct 15th, 2009
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I
used to never have self-image issues. I was a star athlete in high school, always had lots of friends, and never really worried about the way i looked. When i started college a year ago, i didnt have time for sports because i was so focused on classes so i eventually gained 50 pounds. Now, i'm a fairly tall girl so i guess i didnt notice how out of shape i was until it had gone too far.
I have a boyfriend who i started dating back in high school. He's a great guy, but i notice that he even is not as attracted to me. He comes and visits me less than he used to, there are no more romantic gestures, and i know that this also has to do with us dating for so long, but i cant help but think that if this wonderful guy can't even love me anymore, who will?
I used to have so much confidence in myself. I used to love who i was and the life i lived. Now, I have to try ten times harder to look decent in clothes, try ten times harder to be social with people, and i feel like there's no way to fix it. All i do is bottle up the hurt for long periods of time until i just break and cry for hours. I don't love myself, i dont even LIKE myself. I hate who i've become.
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 Feeling blah  | Posted Oct 15th, 2009 at 9:25PM Have you thought about seeing a therapist? I know it sounds dumb, but talking about things with someone who won't judge you really helps to make things seem a lot less messed up and unfixable. If you feel like you're not fit, find a sport or activity you enjoy, and just get lost in it when you have free time. Personally, my favorite is rock climbing, because it requires complete concentration and its a great workout. Look, I have been there, and I know even little things may seem like huge obstacles, but just remember, don't quit trying because of all-or-nothing thinking. Take small steps. And I know this sounds dumb and cliched, but you ARE beautiful.   |
 | Posted Oct 15th, 2009 at 9:30PM You sound like a wonderful girl. I am a guy never had those issues the girls need to deal with. But I can say that if he really loves you for who you are, no matter how you look, he will still treat you as his princess. I said it because, I met a girl recently over the internet, she gave me her beautiful pics. I really really really like her heart and mind. but I thought, maybe it is because she looks so gorgeous. Yesterday, I found out accidentally, she is obese and it takes me 15 mins to really be sure that is her. I was shocked for a while. But now, I still realllllllly like her and I don't mind about her. The experience tells me that she has some self-esteem issue. I will be here to support her and be with her whenever she needs me and wants me. She means much more than the number on the scale. Keep me post about how is it going. Add you to my circle. |
| Posted Oct 15th, 2009 at 9:32PM There are many ways to cope with this issue. therapist is just one of the options. Whatever you choose, I hope you will be happy about it. coz it is your choice. Happiness is a decision. |
 | Posted Nov 6th, 2009 at 5:52PM I have a similar story. I was an independent and successful athlete in collge, and I had an eating disorder. I got down to like 85lb. I was as sad then if not more than I am now. I got "help" and now I'm just overweight and I hate myself even more. I'm dating a great guy, and we live together (and have for 1.5 yr) He clearly isn't sexually attracted to me. We rarely have sex or anything. I know what it feels like to know in your heart that the person you love the most isn't even attracted to you. I have PCOS, likely brought on because of the eating disorder, and it is very difficult to lose weight even with exercise and diet. I can't even stand looking at myself any more. Sometimes I wish I would just fade away. |
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