Nursing Has Ruined My Life And My Health

Alittle over 6 years ago, my husband called and asked me to come home from work. He was suffering from severe depression and the hospital didn't like it but usually let me go home. That day they said if I left I would be charged with desertion of my patients and not only lose my license but possibly go to jail. Icalled him back and told him to go i other room and talk to my mother they always got along great and I would be home in 4 hours. He agreed. I called him back about 1 and half hours later and got no answer. I called him again in another 1/2 hour. I called my mother and asked her to check on him. I never got to speak with him. When I got home about 20 minutes after 7 I didn't see him lying on the sofa and watching tv nor was in the bedroom taking a nap so I slowly walked toward the back of the house to get to the pool all the while the dogs were locked in their crates and barking like lunatics. I got to the back door and opened it and saw him. He was face down in the pool. I jumped in and immediately saw the gash on his head and turned him over to see that he was all blue from lividity. I called or rather screamed for help but it was July in central Florida and everyone was in the house with the A/C on. I couldn't even get my mohter to come out. The only one who came to help me was our 6 month old Doberman puppy. We got him to the side of the pool and he was too heavy for us toget out. The pup was still too small and she would bite him only his swimsuit and I had to prop him on the side of the pool and run inside to get my mother. I had to scream for her because she was talking on the phone to our daughter. She called 911 but I knew he was dead. I also knew my life as I knew it was over. I now actually smile when my new hospital talks about disasters such as hurricanes like I am going to leave my dogs home to be terrified and possibly dead. My hospital doesn't let you bring in pets. I just agree to everything and know I will either be at home with my fur children or on the way north to get away. I do not believe any of the those 98 year old patients are worth the life of 1 of my dogs. I have since lost my mother, daughter and grandson. I hate nursing more that anything on this Earth. I am now 61 and should be enjoying time with the most wonderful husband in the world and I am seeing psychiatrists, therapists and gong to groups none of which help. I want to die and be with my husband. I am not suicidal anymore but that is what I want as I have no life now at all.
nursehaternumber1 nursehaternumber1
10 Responses Oct 17, 2012

Thank you for sharing. That was brave. Nursing has also destroyed my life. I was ridiculed mocked humiliated criticized insulted by nursing instructors deans colleagues managers peers and patients. This destroyed my self perception. I am non- functional due to severe insecurity.

I feel for you but ask yourself, what would your husband, mother, daughter and grandson want you to do? There is a fantastic book called Man's Search for a Meaning by Viktor Frankl. It's based on his experience in the Nazi death camps. How he somehow miraculously survived but lost all his loved ones. He was a psychiatrist and created logo therapy. It's a great read and you can probably read it online for free as its not a new book.

That is awful. I am so sorry and I agree with you , your family comes first. I don't think you would have lost your license etc if you had family emergency to tend to but you might have lost your job ( unless you were Union maybe ). Every hospital I have worked I had to sign papers in orientation that it's an at will employer and I can leave or he fired for no reason at all at the discretion of the employer. I work in radiology and boy do they make a huge deal if something comes up and you leave early or call off because there is a huge staffing shortage and just one person calling out causes a huge disruptive factor to patient care because they have to make a million calls to try to get someone in. That is the hospitals fault bc we shouldn't be so short staffed that we can't have a lunch or have one person call off and the world ends.

Every hospital I have worked also has the stupid disaster rules that you can't leave the hospital no matter what kind of hurricane , flood , tsunami is coming or you will not have a job when you return. I absolutely hate working for medical facilities

Try reading this book. It gives advice on how to use your nursing experience to transition into a completely different career.

How to Get Out of Nursing

by Melanie Nightingale

Available on Amazon as an eBook

I never experienced the horror that you have, but I have broken my foot at home and my boss gave me such a hard time about time off or even wearing my medical boot so I could have foot support while I worked my 12 hour shifts. I try to squeeze in a lunch most days, but it is 10 minutes if I am lucky. My surgeon said that I need to rest my foot, but that is not possible. I tried to talk with my boss about scheduling my shifts every other day, but the schedule is made and written in stone. I have had the experience that nurses are some of the least understanding people about health or personal issues. Many of the bosses I have are just genuinely mean. I want to quit nursing but I went to school to long to give up. I hate nursing! What a relief to say it out loud.

I am so so sorry for all of your losses. Your story breaks my heart. I dont even know what to say that could possibly express how horrible, what you have lived through. I am praying for you everyday for God to bring you justice! Those bast..ds! I wish there was something I could do. I am just so very, very sorry. With much love and respect, sylvrsprngs57.

I totally get it. I already feel like the nursing profession has sucked all that is good out of me. I'm at the point now where I need to escape. The job has just done too much damage. I can't compensate for the crappy system we work in anymore. I can't believe I've sacrificed so much of my life and health for such a terrible job. I don't regret any of the help I was able to give, but I'm depleted. The idea of giving anymore make me seethe. They really don't tell you the truth about the job or the career. All you hear is what a noble profession it is. I would never encourage anyone to be a nurse, certainly not a shift working nurse, unless they planned to only do it for 10 years or less. No one really knows what it's like unless they've done the job.

I could have written this, I fully understand. I'm ready to give it all up and lose everything I own just to escape such a horrible uncaring profession.

I know exactly what you are saying. I completely want to leave nursing. Every time I walk away something drags me back on my hands and legs. The profession is so controlled. It sucks all hope one has in life. I have a BA. That won't get me far. My life is a complete loss. There is no hope left. I wish I was smarter and could be another profession but I am not smart. I regret nursing.

Even though this post is old I need express my sympathy for you. My God what a horror show. I can't imagine how it must of felt but know that it moved me. Hope you are well God Bless

Sorry, although this has happened if anyone thinks I am leaving my kids they are in for a surprise especially after reading your story. Maybe you can sue some of these jerks.

I am sorry for your loss. I wish you could reach my wife. She is an ICU RN and it's all about the career. All about the job! I was a paramedic for 10 years, and I do know what she goes through on a day to day basis. That said, I have watched her for the last five years of her decade long career slip further away from my son and I. I hope the feminist BS artists in the upper echelons and the scumbags that run the hospitals choke on the misery they cause within the 'caring' profession. Don't feel alone, nursing ruins a lot of lives!

While this is an older post, I want to comment and let you know that out of all your heartache and pain you have taught many people a lesson. Life is more important than work... and maybe you have done what many nurses spend an entire life trying to do ... saved lives. I can't speak for anyone else but I can say that I will never let this happen to me again. I will NOT turn down my family in times of crisis because I'm at work. Jail or not.