Local School Teacher/*********

Of course he thinks its not his fault. And he shows how he cares nothing for his wife and victimes by blaming them. Look if there is something wrong in your head that makes you rape little kids why are we trying to make excuses for this? Should they be in prison so they can share storys and learn how to not get caught next time?

They should be kept in prison yes, only if they actually get there, but my dad was a child molester and he was always let out by the judge, no prison ( just two weeks)... Lets also go against lawyers and judges that help them not to go to prison...
The peadophiles are wrong so are a lot of judges and lawyers... Agree?

They try to feed the public that nonsense after they get caught, if they didn't think they were doing anything wrong, they wouldn't threaten their victims not to tell by using lies such as "they will all blame you", and "everyone will be mad at you", or "you will go to jail" They do know it's wrong, they just try to blow smoke up everyone else's a$$ when they get caught..........

I am a foster carer and thought I'd share some of my insights. I haven't heard of a genetic link but there are alot of famillies where when a child has been abused, you find that the father and or mother was also abused and possibly the grandparent as well. I think it is because they normalise that sort of behaviour as a coping mechanism. Not all abuse victims will go on to abuse, but of the ones that do, there always seems to be a substance misuse or other mental illness in the family too. It is also more likely is they were abused by a woman. Not every child molester is a paedophile, paedophilia is a mental disorder where they are attracted to young kids under the age of 13, they usually see no wrong in what they are doing and believe that they are in love with their victim and visa versa. Unfortunately you also get non paedophiles abusing kids, and they are the really dangerous ones, attraction is not their main motivation, sometimes sadism, control and other things drive them if they have the opportunity, they are more likely to kill following their abuse than a paedophile would.

Child abuse, especially sexual abuse, is the most evil, abhorrent, damaging behavior known to man.

its all an act of control.......when i learnt this.....i took control back.......thats what saved me. Its sad to think that in society.....how when sex is involved in a crime.......usually the victim goes on trial. I really didnt think my own mother would be judge and jury......i lost...my stepfather won.....life sucked.....til i took my power back. I asked for a retrial years later.......had a witness this time....my little sister....his own daughter......according to my sister she told my mother what he did to her.......according to my mother........she didnt tell. What a mess.....didnt talk to her for years....the judge i mean.....i believe my sister told =( Of course the judge would have to admit....had she listened to me......my sister might have been spared.....which means....well you can likely figure that one out =( Wrong call.......judge!!



I also believe in the end he will get his and the judge......she will get hers too....this helps me get through.



survivors of sexual abuse need to start standing up....talking.....telling......30 some years ago it was hard to stand up and tell......i cant see how it is getting any better....i mean if it means losing your family and being sent to foster care.....i can see how a kid might keep it to themselves.......but in truth it just keeps it a hush hush situation...........society as a whole needs to change this......we need to find a way....too many innocent peoples lives are messed up because of this! =(

It's even worse when it's little children who cannot stick up for themselves.

@mikemcneill, you're not cynical, you're right!

@Elses, thanks for your detailed writing down of your thoughts and yes, there is a thin line and often the teenage victims love their abusers. I had a friend, she was 15 back then and her stepfather seduced her. She loved him and I couldn't convince her, that this was a wrong thing to have sex with him. He was very thoughtful and got her the pill. Her mother, of course, knew nothing about that all.

@Tsunami3, never heard about genetic factors, that was new to me.

@Elses The clinical term "*********" wouldn't include the person you mentioned. ********** is attraction to prepubescent children, which usually means under age 13 or so. It's perfectly normal to be attracted to a 15 year old who looks like a 20 year old. (If this is the age of the kids you teach then believe me, attraction exists.) It's still illegal to have sex with them (in most places) but that would make him a (statutory) rapist or perhaps a child molester. The problem with a lot of these "child" terms is that they don't differentiate between a 6 year old and a 16 year old. And to me there's a big difference between the two. "**********" is the one word which does distinguish these ages, and it bothers me when people try to cloud its meaning.



The other thing I want to mention is that ********** has been shown to run in families more than other mental disorders, which could be explained by simply growing up with one around, but probably means there are genetic factors too.

Well it does seem obvious that if you had an interest in young kids you would choose a profession that allows you access to a lot of them....or am I being too cynical here?

You wouldnt believe how many teachers in Canada have been convicted of this. And everyone have been *innocent*. Sad

i dont want to start another debate on here, but i agree with you. after 20 years, my biological father sees nothing wrong with what he did. i ended up in foster care and his entire side of the family rejected me because "i sent him to prison." maybe thats where he learned it. dont know and dont care, he ruined a large part of my life without me even realizing why. i hate anyone who could even think of hurting a child and in that case intentionally hurting another human. i dont feel like i belong in this world anymore. not meaning im suicidal. meaning i just dont understand people anymore.

Yes, their behaviour sucks. I heard some of them say, that a 4 year old girl wanted to have sex with him, that she loved him as an adult woman would do and that would be the normal behaviour of children. Utterly disgusting.

Great post. If they are innocent...then they didn't do anything wrong..,that's what innocent means. You hit the nail on the head, mike. Their twisted hedonism comes before anything else. Put them away for life and make them run on habitrails.

I wasn't talking about an innocent person....I was making the point that pedophiles even when confronted with total evidence of their crimes will not admit they are doing anything wrong.

That is a common trait of pedophiles, they convince themselves that such relationships are harmless. That is why I make sure to contradict them whenever I see such an argument on sites like this.



But I don't agree with your last sentence because an innocent person will also not admit they did anything wrong.

Fully agree.

Fully agree.