Nice Avatar, Who Is It?

How many people are going to hate me for writing this? I have no idea. Alas, here goes:
I find it frustrating the number of people (mainly women) posting pictures of other people as their own avatar. Not only does the number of women in this practice frustrate me; also the type and styles of pictures. Why, if you are uncomfortable posting your own picture, would you post a sexy, provocative picture of a sexy, skinny woman as YOU??? I'f you aren't going to post a pic of your ***, bent over the bed, in a thong, then why would you post one of a different woman; and one you don't know??? If you aren't going to slide into a revealing babydoll, and take naughty pictures of yourself, why would you post that AS yourself???

Add to that number of people who annoy me, the numbers of men who actually have these charlatans in their circle. It must then be true: Men tell the most lies, women tell the BIGGEST lies. Folks, fewer than 5% of the WORLD'S population is under size 8 (US sizing). The likelihood that all these women here, or on all the other social networking sites, are so skinny, voluptuous, and attractive is just impossible. You're more like to get struck by lightning, AND win the lottery, than find a sexy avatar user that actually IS the woman in the picture.

Beyond that, some folks are smart enough to connect to this reality and actually ASK their "friend." I've heard some incredibly specious stories. One woman, a certain pixie, told my friend that it was her in the photo, that she owned the studio. Um,.. not likely. Someone that owns a photog studio, in New York City, is NOT going to use any of their work photos for an anonymous website, AND keep the photo nomenclature attached. I actually DO know photographers in New York City, and they would never, never release their work photos on any website that didn't scream in blinking lights the name of their studio and provide links to them and their services. So then another friend had a woman say that the pictures were of her, from a friend that was a photographer. I'm sorry to tell you this, but no, this is also a lie. I can sit here and explain this situation, and show you the legal ramifications of models taking photos that do not belong to them, or the unlikelihood of photographers giving models permission to use photos for something so petty and ridiculous; but I won't. I think in the end, most of us here don't actually want to know.

Perhaps it's not the people I hate, but the lie. I do not post pictures of myself here, or anywhere, because of what I do, and what I'm into. People I work with, face to face, they know what I look like. But in being present with me, they are also in a precarious situation as they need to protect their anonymity--almost MORE than I do. But I never tolerate the lie. When I ask for a likeness (I never ask for pictures, too damning were it to get out), I expect total honesty. When I discover they have lied, the connection is over and I explain to them that their behavior is dishonest and ultimately betrays their own self-hatred. My work is about self-discovery and self-love. My life-stream is about nurturing and helping people discover the wonder and beauty of who they are. Starting out by lying about something absolutely verifyable is ridiculous. I understand pseudonyms, and false fronts from the perspective of anonymity. But I do not tolerate deception. If you are not a 5'10" man, with thick brown hair and a healthy, athletic build then you had better not tell me that. However, if you are balding, a bit overweight, wear glasses and are terrible out of shape, we can still work together. Because those things are workable, and you can lose weight, and you can accept your balding head and just be bald without the comb-over. When you accept and love who you are, you wouldn't believe how easy it is to shape what you see in the mirror. That goes for women as well.

My suggestion if you all feel such need to post something sexy: Take a picture of your best feature, whatever it is. Crop and angle it so that only that feature is revealed. Then, use THAT picture. At least let YOU shine through and stop hiding behind skinny, unrealistic models who have their own issues and hangups in life.
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Aug 6, 2010