I got this email from my father one Christmas, and it is an example of the horror of what "Political Correctness" is becoming. I've made my own comments about the greeting in bold.
Note: I did not write this greeting, I am just posting it on this site for everyone to read. I also think the original writer was making fun of political correctness.
Politically Correct Season's Greetings
Holiday Greetings to Everyone,
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. When exactly did people start becoming such wusses and taking things so seriously that they have to be offended by everything under the sun?
So I met with my solicitor yesterday, and on his advice I wish to say the following:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter or summer solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious or secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I'm already starting to get lost here as to what on earth this letter is trying to say. I think, and this is far fetched here, that it's trying to wish me a good holiday season, or heaven forbid, a Merry Christmas.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that it is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. OK... Now I'm really confused. I think this means Happy New Year? I have no idea why the need to mention demographic information is listed.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher. Um... yeah... OK... I believe now the writer is apologizing for wishing the reader a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Disclaimer: No trees were harmed in the sending of this message, however, a significant number of electrons were slightly inconvenienced. LOL. That's just funny. :)
I hope you had fun reading my post. And remember, it's all for entertainment.