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Eating My Pumpkin Is the Last Straw

I've been generous to the rodents. I've allowed them to eat scraps out of my compost. I've reluctantly ignored them when they've dug up the mulch around my garden looking for God know's what. I scowled but walked on when you dropped a stick on me in October. But, that's it. When I saw your tail and *** sticking out of the top of my pumpkin while you were head first in the middle of pumpkin seeds and guts, I was ready to shoot and take no rodent prisoners. You watch your back buddy.
Inman Inman 31-35, M 28 Responses Jan 2, 2008

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Washington's aggressive squirrels--which steal my tomatoes from my windowbox before they are fully ripe--have met their match with my small havaheart trap baited with peanut butter. They then go for a long ride.

It's just a squirrel, you really need to get a grip mate.

er get a life? srsly calm dahn dear its only a fukin pumpkin not d end of d world or do u av no social life lol..x

*whispers*don't tell igce but i hate them*whispers*

Eat them?<br />
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No, just rip the crap out of them in order to get in and eat the pumpkin seeds, spit them on my porch, laugh at me, and mock me as they run off.

Rats! <br />
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Where are these pics?

Does Milton also spread diseases and does Dante rain down fire when you fall asleep after cuddling/<br />
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Do you realize the wide array of ratty puns that are available now that I've met them?

As I typed the "ds." I knew I'd attract the dotdotdot. <br />
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Are they nice?

Rat bastards.

Too funny. At least it had a bushy tail instead of a slick one. I know that they are both rodents but I am so thankful this wasnt a story about a rat. They terrify me and I have decided if I ever get one in my home that I shall promptly move out and let them have it.

I blame it on mtv.

Yes, I mean, is that too much to ask? <br />
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I mean, if I'm nice enough to grow a few for them, the least they could do is slice it with their little claws, grill it in the sun for me, and then leave it with a sprinkle of basil on my patio. <br />
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Squirrels these days just are not as polite.

Do you prefer they take the tomato from the vine, slice it for you, and sprinkle it with a bit of Gorgonzola?

No, I'm quite confident that they are using me. Toying with me to be exact. <br />
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They know that I'm willing to share veggies with them but get pissed when they eat out my pumpkins and when they take one bite out of a ripe tomato and then leave it on the vine. <br />
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But, I'll kill it with kindness.

No, I'm quite confident that they are using me. Toying with me to be exact. <br />
<br />
They know that I'm willing to share veggies with them but get pissed when they eat out my pumpkins and when they take one bite out of a ripe tomato and then leave it on the vine. <br />
<br />
But, I'll kill it with kindness.

Aww, very nice.<br />
<br />
Perhaps they are ready to accept your existence?

I've tried the cayenne. I've been down many preventative roads and am ready to just accept their existence now. <br />
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I might also put an old sweater as a bribe.

Sometimes :)<br />
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Spray the plants you want to keep squirrel-free with a potent mixture of cayenne pepper and water. <br />
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Think 5 parts cayenne, 2 parts water!

It's obvious that you've got a big heart. <br />
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Perhaps I'll just plant twice as many things in my next garden and try to appease them?

hahaha<br />
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I bet he did chuckle as he defecated on my sweater. He was imagining your face. <br />
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:P<br />
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And it's not like I ever brought my sweater back inside. It was my gift to him so he could p*ss and play in it to his heart's desire!

dayum baby, make up yo mind!

I bet he laughed when he **** on your sweater. <br />
<br />
He was using you.

Good, 'cause I once had a squirrel that frequented my porch. I called him "Nuts." I always gave him my leftover corn flakes in the morning. A sweater I had hanging out to dry became his shelter during the cold season (not by my choice). I figured he needed it more than I did. He made a little nest out of it and brought all his squirrel buddies over to his new pad. He was a fun little guy.

it's okay wonderlust. I hate squirrels and I love squirrels. I got you covered.

Oh no! <br />
<br />
We simply do not agree on this one!

No, I meant I'd do anything for a pretty snail who wants me to like the pretty squirrel. <br />
<br />
The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend. The squirrel is my friend.

But....but....but........alright. <br />
<br />
I have been converted. I shall, from now until all eternity, treat my fellow squirrel as I want to be treated. <br />
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I'll do anything for a pretty woman. :)

Nope. I'm a firm believer that birds are the key to the existence of trees. <br />
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"Eat, **** and leaves." <br />
<br />
That should be the title of a book....