sun....bane of my life

It began when I was small and would burn and blister like bacon in a hot iron pan. Covered in silver cream that turned my skin blue. Raging headaches, burning eyes watering from the bright harsh light. Soon the insomnia which starts in early spring and lasts through late fall in California. Praying for the blessedly cool and long days of late fall and winter. Sunlight brings suicidal depression, insomnia, intense migraines, loss of appetite, raging mood swing. I hate it I loathe it. From my earliest days i have loved the night, its soothing darkness calming my overheated eyes and brain. If i could afford it I would chase the winter around the world, never having to face another hellish sun ray again I hate having to explain to the sin worshipers that for some people, the sun is toxic and painful, that there is such a thing as RSAD. Living in southern California with my condition is nearly impossible. I have had to make changes. I stay in a dark and cool house all day most of the year. I work at night from 10 pm to 7 am. I adore the night and live my life happily during the night time hours. Sometime my body craves the life sustaining sunlight so I go out mid morning for 30 minutes and soak it up and then ho take a cool shower and try to forget I was out there. I have yet to meet a sympathetic doctor but after 45 years I know my body and what is good for it, and it is not the sun.
mystiewolf mystiewolf
41-45, F
1 Response Dec 9, 2012

You have my deepest sympathies. Former socal native here who hates the sun as much as you do and for all the same reasons. I got out of socal many years ago, but to this day have NIGHTMARES about being forced back. The weather is unbearable. Too much sunlight....and like you, if I could chase winter around the globe and never have to see one more day of bright *** sunlight again? I would do it happily!