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For Your Enjoyment...one Of My Rambles About The World And Life

I'm sorry but i'm an ******* by nature...what that means, is that this world turns me into a person that is and I quote "not nice" end quote haha. Which it really isn't funny that i allow this piece of **** rock and the people on it to affect me and make me feel that way. But what is funny to me, is how in spite of that fact, I still choose to try and be the person that is and I quote again "nice" end quote.

For you see somewhere inside of me, i truly believe that there is much much more to this all than just one life and thats the end of it. To me i don't think we really die, more like just pass on to something/somewhere else. Why I feel that way is debatable but honestly I feel i've died a few times, well at least I probably should've. If "Heaven & Hell" are places that do exist beyond this realm, then I believe i've visited both of them. Truthfully, I can't explain to anyone what exactly i saw, felt, heard, etc. I personally just know there's a lot to it, thats for sure. Light vs. Dark, Warm vs. Chilly, Pleasant vs Uncomfortable....there is obviously many many more that i could list, but I think your able to understand what I'm saying by those examples.

What ceases to amaze me is that people seem to think that everyone and everything just is simple as can be and that there is a explanation to everything. While i do agree with that to an degree, i must at the same time/ on the other hand disagree because some things are mysterious. The true amount of knowledge that exists to us is in my opinion, only a fragment of what really exists/really is. That is also a good reason why i believe in some sort of afterlife, because its just another chapter in the learning process. No person has the knowledge of everything that exists known to man for that is something so expansive, that a single person does not have enough time to physically encompass it all. Even if a person could, they still would only have a limited sense of all that there is to fully know.

dont ask me why but for some reason i think people really believe the whole purpose of life is to see who can make the most money...and that is sickening. Thats the least important thing in my opinion. In fact i actually feel sorry for people who think that. Its really sad because i think that because nowadays money is so necessary well not really but pretty much everyone will say you need money to survive and thats part of the other guys plan to trick us all and lose focus on what is really important. To me the goal is.....well idk for sure yet, still working on that one!!


i kno one thing, i hate life
so much struggle and strife
everyday and every night
i just want to end my life
bullet thru my brain
please put an end to this pain
because i feel as if im insane
something must be wrong in the membrane
maybe because i get lifted, like a crane
yes i get high, would you like to try??
No?? well thats okay
but just understand that im odd, like snow in may
just please don't hate, lets get some things straight
see i got so much piled up on my plate
and all i want is to be great
thats what im destined to be
something you read about, or watch on tv
J.C. he lives in me
but the devil sitting on me like an anvil
so all i can do is say....F'it and smile
because after all these trials, and we reach the end
who's gonna judge me?....surely not a man
because we all eventually kick the can
and im convinced....in the end, nothing really matters man
DAMNNNNN!!!


take care and thanks for reading!!

GOD Bless!!
papasmerf21 papasmerf21 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 12, 2012

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Sorry to read about what you're feeling. *hugs* People are just frickin' idiots.<br />
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When it comes to money, I agree that there is much more to life than that. Money is important to keep yourself afloat, but that's not what is most important. What is? I don't know yet either....lol. The answers are going to be different depending on the person. <br />
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If you ever want to talk, send me a message :)

will do for sure as i'm always down for a chat and usually trying to fend of boredom lol

i've never really been good at entertaining myself either!!