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A Bad Father Son Relationship

Hi,I am 47 years of age,married with 2 wonderful kids.My relationship with my father when I was younger was and still is not close.When I was a child over the age of around 8 he hardly spent any time with me and when he did he made me look foolish in front of his friends.He never encouraged me in any way,in fact if I looked like I was going to be good at anything he discouraged me almost as if he felt threatened.He is a very cruel person and I have been subjected to serious mental and emotional abuse over the years(even now).My mother is a shell of a woman and this is 100% his fault as she has also been the victim of his cruelty,amongst other things.I have witnessed this first hand on many occasions,but my mother pleaded with me not to say anything to him as she thought this would make the situation worse,I respected her wish and said nothing.Seeing your mother shaving your fathers body hair off because he caught crabs while having a bit on the side is not a nice thing for any son or daughter to see,but that image just about sums up my fathers  "relationship" with my mother.As a result of all this I am very awkward in social situations and sometimes feel affraid to even leave the house.Luckily I have a job which is mostly solitary.Writing this down has helped to relieve a bit of the strain I have been under recently,it's good to talk as they say.Another side effect of my "relationship" with my father is i tend to drink a fair bit,not every night but every now and again I will have an almighty binge.This has started to effect my health even more.My fathers business failed a while ago and I think he is hoping mine does the same,like all small businesses it has been a struggle recently so he decided to have a sarcastic dig at me about having "plenty of money".I have been lucky in other parts of my life,I have met some really strong characters who have helped me and encouraged me over the years,without these people I shudder to think what I would have become.Cheers dad.
IanSummers1963 IanSummers1963 46-50 3 Responses Apr 27, 2011

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its ur fate <br />
plz dont behave like ur father to ur childrens

its ur fate <br />
plz dont behave like ur father to ur childrens

r u a good father to ur kids now?