Is It Bad To Be Mad?

Ok, let me start by saying that I love my boyfriend with all my heart and this is not meant as anything against him... I just need to vent and don't want this to be the first thing he sees (if I message him) when he gets his phone back, or get a letter, or can go on facebook eventually. Plus, I do not have his address yet, and I do not want my first letter to make him stressed out, or any letter actually.

The first couple of days (about 3) that he was at bootcamp I got texts while he was in reception at night. It was probably 5-7 texts in total at night telling me sweet things, and what he did that day. This is the second day that he is in the 1st phase of Basics... so he no longer was able to use his phone since Saturday. The first day (yesterday) was hard, but I was helping with the Special Olympics (bowling) so I kept myself busy. Today, I was on facebook however... and saw something that got me frustrated.

I am friends with his mother and younger sister.... (not only on facebook but in real life) so I was messaging them when I saw something on his younger sisters page. He is supposedly suppose to be mad at his older sister for the longest time now, and his two older brother, and his father. I have stood up for him, through these situations, and loved to do that for him. Apparently he was reaching out to his sister in Basic... his older sister... the one he apparently does not like talking to.

This older sister has been in Army Basic training before as well.... so I would understand wanting to talk to her. However, how can I be there for him but at the same as him talking to me he is talking to her! I thought he was texting me slow the first couple of days because he was busy, when now I know it was because he was talking to her! I give everything to help him and he gives his time that he could spend sleeping for himself, or talking to me knowing that he won't be able to for a while talking to her. I don't want to be angry... or for us to get into an arguement over something this silly. I just needed to vent so I would not get mad at him during this time.

It now makes me think he was just saying all those sweet things to be because he wanted to soften me up for when I found out... or because there wasnt other things that he wanted to tell me. How can she get the gift of his time when she has done nothing to earn it. Now i am left with less time because he gave it to someone that apparently I shouldn't like becuase she was mean to him.

Is it silly to be mad at this?
Angie0618 Angie0618
18-21, F
1 Response Sep 23, 2012

honestly, i feel like that too! my boyfriend is still in reception until friday but his mom has not been supportive at all about him joining and his mom absolutely hates me... his mom has done things to try and break us up and just interfere with us but he still wont cut the umbilical cord!!! i had the same problem with him before he left, now that he is over there, he kinda learned the value of our relationship. exact words " but yeah what the military does is make us realize, well at least made me realize how much the little things matter and when you lose the things that mean the most to you thats where it hurts, and you begin to appreciate everything and everyone around you alot better its actually really cool!" all you have to do right now is stay supportive. right now im having huge problems with his mom and ii feel like i want him to be here right now to settle this and i get so hopeless but i just will put it off until he gets back for him to settle it

Thank you! His sister actually did respond to me the other day telling me that she talked to him in reception but has not heard a thing since. It was one day I think... and when I think about it he sent me more than her! I do not want to be selfish, but she has hurt him so much that i was mad also that she might pull her stuff while he is there and he doesn't need that right now. Plus, I wanted time to comfort him.... but I guess we have to take what we can get from our men right now, especially if you think about what they are going through! Trevor is in Phase 1 now and I got a call last night to tell me his mailing address. Hearing his voice made everything that was in my head just disapear! He told me he loved me and missed me but didn't have much time. That going a week without talking to me is driving him crazy, but he could not get into that right now! The military does make them realize things! It is bad that they have to go through the rough parts they are going through... but it will make them stronger, US stronger... in the end. Making our love ARMY STRONG lol. Message me if you ever want to :-). Where is your boyfriend in basic training at? I understand the mom thing believe me! lol

I know what you mean because my boyfriends mom is like the most evil person on earth! My bf and I had broke up for a bit and she started putting all these lies in his head and she made rumors about me. When me and him started dating again she was so mad and decided to make his life hell for a month! She wouldn't talk to him at all. She barely started talking to him about 3 days before he left which pissed me off. Now his mom hates me and he is still over there kissing her butt you know? And I'm here like ok it's your mom I get it but she has done things to me and he let's her get away wt it and that is something me and hi have to talk about ASAP. When I told him to send me the packet with the information for his grad he stayed quiet and is most likely sending it to his mom so I won't have any info because I can't even speak to his mom she said if I tried to she would call the police. When he found that out he was mad and puts me first now. His first phone call he had 45 minutes and he called me for 42 minutes and 3 to his mom but she didn't answer him

I understand because my ex boyfriend and I had the same situation... that is why he is my ex (plus he was not right for me). I am sure that won't happen but I understand how difficult that can be. My boyfriend and his mom are not extremely close so I have the privledge of his time for phone calls every now and again... but I also feel bad about theirr relationship. It is a double edge sword. You want him to have a great relaitonship with his mother, but not an unhealthy one that will eventually hurt your relationship as it becomes even more serious! Normally it is one extreme or the other, so it is so difficult to find balance. Even if she was sane... it is normally tense between the two girls in his life.