Going Insane

OK so being on here has really helped, but i have been waiting for his msg now nearly 48 hours, normally this wouldn't be expected it could be weeks, but i wish i had not known he was going out on an op, cause now all i can think is something has happened, and me sitting here on my tod will not be told anything if something DOES happen...this is a privilege only there for wives

So this is my rant for today
I miss him
I miss just messaging him
i miss hearing his silly jokes
i miss the message which says "i'm back, safe and got both my legs lol"

i hate feeling needy like this
i hate sounding like some bunny boiler
i hate that all i do is run things over in my head
i hate that there is no one or nothing to blame for my hating feelings

i wish i could just see him come online, even if he can't speak just to know he is ok
i wish i knew how to feel
i wish i knew how to act
i wish i could just close my mind, even if just for a minute
i wish i wish i wish our guys weren't needed out there, but then they wouldn't be them would they?
techgeekgirl techgeekgirl
26-30, F
Dec 1, 2012