I believe my condition is hereditary, then again I doubt it. My mom has bi-polar. My doctor said I do too. I know I do. I put my fianxce through the wash. I don't mean to. I love him, then again he;s an alcoholic. My mom is a dope addict, never worked. Only hustled. Me? I am the complete opposite of both of them. My daughter is a lesbian, with a learning disability and she is 18yrs old. She hates me, or just don't know how to express her feelings, but I kept a job and kept her alive all this time? I introduced her to God and life. So why am I the bad guy? My problem? Maybe if the people I live with did their part, I would not be so depressed and have my bi-polar symptoms appear. yes-I can go from nice to physcho is a heartbeat. I hate it. Everyday I want to be better. Lately, it feels like I am going to lose everything I have worked so hard for. I am scared to death, but I want to give up. Nothing is working for me. All I think about is maybe if I can find someone who can relate to me and motivate me, maybe I will get better. There is so much negativity at home, I feel like running away and leaving everyone and everything behind and starting over. I just want to be loved and apprecuated, and not taken advantage of. Will this ever go away?