I'M Not Just Clumsy, I Have A Brain Tumor!For the first time in my 37 years, I had the most amazing experience thanks to work -- got to travel to a not-so-quite-third-world-country for a project -- Bangalore, India. AMAZING trip!
After I got back from India, I thought I brought an ear infection back with me – I had chronic ear pain, and very specific, very strong head pain on the right, back side of my head. After 3 rounds of antibiotics, I was sent to a specialist (an ENT) and he had a CT with contrast done...He thought my ear looked fine but was concerned about the head pain. I will forever be indebted to Dr. C for pushing for that CT scan.
So...I have a brain tumor. It appears to be a menengioma, growing on the lining of the brain, about the size of a ping pong ball, pressing into the balance/coordination area of my brain – this now TOTALLY explains how I got a fat lip from falling in a bar hotel while in India (had NOTHING to do with the cocktails, of course!). Right...
Although my little tumor highly likely to be benign, it’s awfully close to a main vein on that right side of my head so I have to get it removed because 1. It’s compromising that vein or 2. It will compromise that vein as it continues to grow. I have an MRI Monday to have a better look and then follow up again with the neurosurgeon on Wednesday for next steps. It’s an “easy” neurosurgery because of its location, so I’ll be down maybe 6-8 weeks and then back to work with a (sob) new hairstyle! Neurosurgeon says my rehabilitation depends on how "sticky" the tumor is to the brain. Guess we'll see and learn....
In the meantime, I will continue to literally work my @ss off to make sure my family is ok, my work continues, and I maintain sanity.
I don't think the fact that I have a BRAIN TUMOR has hit me yet .... if anything I feel like an outcast, a societal reject. My son and I were walking around a retail store (World Market) -- and as I walked around looking at all the humans around me, I felt different for the first time ever. Me, the white female in suburbia.. I felt like I was weird because I have this mass in my head and they most likely don't. I don't feel jealous or wronged, just like I don't belong. What do you think?
Anyway, for the time being, any time I put my foot in my mouth, fail to think strategically at work, fall down or just say something stupid, I'm blaming the tumor. It's the tumor's fault! HA!