I Don't Know Who My Real Father Is And It's Killing Me.

I have never met my dad , I found this out when I was 11 / 12 . my first initial reaction was to cry although I wasn't particularly sad , as awful as that sounds . I wasnt used to a father growing up as the man who I thought was my dad hadn't ever really taken a real interest in me ; he favoured my sister more . It has never bothered me until recent years and I've just been pushing it to the back of my mind but im 17 now and it's gnawing away at me knowin that he's out there somewhere with no knowledge of me at all . I feel almost like a part of me is missing and at this age it's hard enough trying to find out who you are without added worry of your identity . I'm not crying myself a river here but I'd really just maybe like to speak to some other people who are on the same boat as me and can relate to me as no one in my family can ; I know they try but sometimes its just not enough and the comfort of someone who understands seems better for closure . although I know that won't fully happen until I meet him finally . also anyways I could try an track him down ? I've tried tirelessly but most require money and well um... I'm 17! don't have a lot of that right now :/ I would ask my family for help but I feel this is something I have to fo without them . please help ?
crazychickx crazychickx
18-21, F
Nov 27, 2012