I Loved Him...he Tried To Kill Me

I was with him for 1 year and 4 months.
At first he was very sweet, he gave me flowers everyday, we talked about anything.
It was great.
Then he started becoming very jealous, he didnt want me to be with anybody but him; but I was okay with that because I didnt want to be
with anyone but him.

We had so much fun together; we took walks in parks, we rode roller coaster rides, we cooked together,
we even started sleeping together. I would love to wake up and have him next to me and make love.
We would have fun even drawing together, or building puzzles.
We sang together, we danced together. I loved being with him.

I dont know why he became aggressive with me. He suddenly started saying mean things to me. Then he would apologize and I loved him so much
so I never left him.

A little over week ago, he tried to kill me. He told me that I cheated on him, and that he was going to kill me. He forced me into his truck, drove to  some fields
and said that nobody was going to find me there. He hit me, he tried to choke me...It was a horrible experience and I felt death very near.
It is a very long story, but to make it short; I escaped; police took him to jail, and now he is in immigration because he was illegal in the US.

I dont understand why he tried to kill me if everything was perfect. I gave him all of my love. I accepted him the way he was.
I truly loved him...and he did this to me...

The worse part is that I still love him. . . and now I know that I will never be with him after what he did to me.

I was going to graduate from a University in 1 year; but my mom told me to withdraw for 6 months because I need time for myself.
She wants me to have therapy, and to travel and have fun. But I dont feel like it.
I dont wanna have fun. I havent stopped crying for over a week. I just want to sleep so that I wont think of him.

He broke my heart; he broke my life.

and I still love him.

I love the person who tried to end my life for no reason.
jessyjay4ever jessyjay4ever
18-21, F
1 Response Jul 11, 2010

i'm sorry to hear that... it always seemed so perfect but later turned out to be so wrong... be brave. (hugs)