First Love

Its funny how the people we meet forever change us. 4 years have passed and till this day I miss you. When I was in high school, I was never close to guys. Only talked to them when they needed help with homework. I get my first job and that was where I met him. Simply the funniest person I've ever met. Charming, dorky and most importantly someone who cared a lot about me. We used to be inseperable. I remember walking into a room and the moment I saw you, all I saw was you. The late night talks we had outside my house till the sun would come out. I always wished it never ended. All of a sudden I realized I was starting to feel something. Something unfamiliar. So I brushed it off, thinking I was over my head. I couldn't have possibly fallen for you. But then I started getting jealous everytime you flirted with other girls. I remember tears forming the time I saw you kiss someone else. That's when I realized I had fallen in love with you. I cried my eyes out, blaming myself for falling so deep. I didn't want to lose you. So I tried my best to hide my feelings. Being best friends was more than enough as long as we were together. Finally I worked up the courage to tell you how I felt, but wanted to be best friends with you. There was no way I could jepordize this friendship. You were really ok with it. After awhile we became 'special' friends. Even though we talked that it was ok, it wasn't. I fell even harder for you even though you didn't. I tried to change everything about myself. Even with how I looked. But in the end it wasn't enough for you to love me back. It took its toll on me that you finally decided it was time to say goodbye. When you left, it did something to me. I felt like my heart was tearing into a million pieces. I would wake up every morning and wonder why did I have to move on if it meant not having you there by my side. It took me 2 years to learn how to live my life without you. Even though I still miss you, I'm happy I have met you. Loving you taught me what it was like to love someone with all your heart. To do everything in your power to see them happy. Although we didn't have a happy ending, I feel blessed to have met you in my life. I wouldn't be the person I am today because of you. Through this experience I learned something I will never forget. It takes 2 to love and it wasnt fair that I was loving with everything that I had. When you love someone you have to save some love for yourself. Sometimes love doesn't last forever, if they leave you, you'll be left with nothing. Learn how to love again. Bc love always finds its way back into your life.
Shielamaria Shielamaria
1 Response May 19, 2012

That's simply beautiful you can find a positive out of all of it. You will find someone that loves everything about you and fall in love deeply with that person. I am still trying to get over my ex-partner. They say it takes 2 years and I am only on month 9, we are truly blessed to meet people that touch our heart. It makes us the people we are today.