I Believed In Us

Please bare with me,ill try not to ramble. My ex and I met on an online game. Something we both enjoyed as individuals and especially together. At the time we were both in relationships. Three years later now both single we decided it was time to meet. By this time I adored her everything we have ever spoke about I took in, I was actually paying attention. This woman intrigued me .The way she was portrayed herself her morals and what she wanted in life. Without even knowing any physical attributes about her I was in way too deep,I already love this woman. We both live in California her in northern call and myself in southern cali. Six to seven hour drive or a quick one hour flight. We decided I'd come drive up north to meet her and all I can say is wow she was gorgeous if I thought I loved her before now I knew I did. We hit it off great we knew each other personality we just never had chance look into each others eyes. It was so comfortable I could just be me and she loved that. This is early October. It was great steamy romantic pure ecstasy. I would fly or drive to see her every weekend. I honestly can say we were both enjoying each other. We been discussing her moving out to s.call with me I had a stable job and.I could financially support the both of.us while she was in-between jobs. I wanted to take care of her. To show her better things In life, to do everything I could in my power to make her feel number one in my life. That how passionate and dedicated I felt for her because she truly mad me feel number one in her life also. She moved to s.cali in Dec 2011 I loved it. She was first person i saw when i woke up and last person in saw everynight. Well I think I praised her enough. I'm the type of person that used the f word and b word with no feeling behind it at all she was opposite even if she would hear it. Not even addressed to her she didn't like it.
Things started changing between us I stopped playing the game and she continued,I had no problem with it at first but it consumed her. There wasn't enough time in the day for the game and myself. When I would address the situation she would reply she needed me time. I believed in her and gave it to her but me time never ended. The kicker to whole story is I believed in her . I thought we would eventually work it out. Even when I caught her not being faithful to me she denied it and made me feel like I drove her to that point. I know feeling change love is not a guarantee. all I wanted to know is truth so. Within weeks she moved back up north. I've had a month to rethink the situation. I was so blinded,thing happening right under my nose. My only defense is I thought our feeling were mutual and there was no way she could intentionally hurt me. Sad part of it all is I truly miss her. Were on no contact rule. Go figure.
main6976 main6976
36-40, M
Jul 3, 2012