To Feel Secured....

I made it halfway this week.... I am living, surviving day by day.

Someday, I will feel secured again...i would feel better again knowing that forever can happen...

He used to tell me how much forever is not enough for him to love me...almost like a song....that gave me security....whether or not it was true, I believed him...

I dropped everything, my career, law school... To start from the beginning and build a life with him...

A few months ago, i did it again because he wanted to live in another state...

I would just forsake everything for him....and it is painfully one way...he does not feel the same...

Sometimes i wonder if it would have been better if he left me on the early part of our marriage....then it might not be as painful....
deleted deleted
26-30
2 Responses Dec 4, 2012

Dear Friend, I'm so sorry for the pain that you are going through. It is real and it hurts. It helps to tell your story, get it out. But you will get through this, it may take time, but you will pull through. You are a young woman and have your whole life ahead of you, not to mention your beautiful kids. Life isn't over, there are just other things down the road for you, good things. Post your story or message me! Hugs.

Hey, I also wish there is a meter one can truly measure the others comitment before you say I do. My wife is getting a divorse after 8 years (only married for about 2). I guess better now that later but I am broken, I have been working on our life together from leaving school everything for her, she didn't even give me heads up, just took her stuff and left, she wants to be young and free while I had to grow up to provide. Either way the pain comes from the depth of the comitment.. Hurts if its not as balanced as one thought. Somehow there is a little bit of confort in the knowledge that there are others going through the same and the promise of new life at some point in the future.