Still Going

I can still see him.
My ex, I mean.
He was perfect.
Just... Perfect.
His almond-colored hair, his yellow-tinted skin, his crystal clear, blue eyes.
Everything about him was perfect.
Literally perfect.
I just couldn't understand why he had chosen me.
I had little money and I wasn't that pretty.
But for about 2 years, he loved me.
He loved me as much as he could.
And I tried my best to show him that I loved him, too.
But I took advantage of his love.
I took advantage of him.
I hurt him with words.
I never meant to, but somehow, I did.
I hurt the love of my life.
And I regret everything.
I never wanted things to come to this.
I thought he'd never leave me.
He promised.
But I guess sometimes, people break promises.
And I can't forgive myself for causing this.
I don't know how I could've been so foolish.
But now, he's gone.
He won't see me.
He won't talk to me.
He won't answer my calls.
The last thing he ever said to me was,
"Don't kill yourself."
But how can I not?
He was like a drug to me.
He was something I needed most.
And now, he's something I can't have.
But that just makes me love him even more.
Even after everything.
Even after he said all those mean things to me.
Even so.
I still love him.
And I will never, ever stop loving him.
NoLongerSane NoLongerSane
13-15, F
Dec 9, 2012