You Fell Out Of Love With Me

YOU FELL OUT OF LOVE WITH ME.....




THIS POEM I WROTE IS DEDICATED TO WILL R.

THE WISH

I wish I was not alone all the time
I wish I could not think of you the drop of a dime
I wish I was young as I used to be
I wish I had the beauty that youth brought to me
I wish that love had not passed me by
I wish I could see you for a moment and go back in time
I wish I could see your smile forever embedded in my mind
I wish I could feel your touch over my skin
I just love you where do I begin
I wish It was not over try to face the fact that this is really the end





I DIDN'T THINK THAT WAS HUMANILY POSSIBLE. YOU FINISHED MY SENTENCES, YOU LOVED ME, I FELT REAL LOVE WITH YOU. BABY, TELL ME WHAT DID I DO?
WHAT DID I SAY TO MAKE YOU FALL OUT OF LOVE WITH ME. YOU PROMISED WE'D BE TOGETHER FOREVER AND EVER AND MORE. I FEEL LIKE YOU KICKED ME TO THE CURB WHEN THINGS GOT A LITTLE COMPLICATED... HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME WHEN I NEEDED YOU MOST. YOU WERE MY BEST FRIEND. YOU WERE THE MOST SENSIOUS AND MOST DEEPEST PERSON I'VE EVER MET. I NEVER HAD ANYONE LIKE YOU, AND BELIEVE ME, I APPRECIATED THE TIME WE WERE TOGETHER. SEVER YEARS, TWO MONTHS, AND FIVE DAYS LATER, TWO HOURS AND TWENTY-EIGHT MINUTES LATER- I FELT LIKE YOU KICKED ME IN THE STOMACHE AND FELT A SICK NAUSEA COME OVER ME AND I JUST WANTED TO DIE. I MEAN I FOUND YOU MY PERFECT MATCH, YOU WERE SO GORGEOUS AND I TRIED TO ACT AS IF YOU WERE A RUN OF THE MILL KINDA GUY, BUT I KNEW IMMEDIATELY YOU WERE THE ONE FOR ME. I CAUGHT YOU LOOKING AT MY *** AS I BENT OVER TO GET MY MONEY WHEN I WAS DONE PUMPING THE GAS AND YOU SAID, "HI SEXY..." I JUST ABOUT MELTED. YOU SMELLED SO GOOD IT TOOK EVERYTHING IN MY QUIVERING BODY TO JUST IGNORE IT WHEN IT JUST MADE ME MELT. I DIDN'T DARE LET YOU IN ON MY SECRECT ATTRACTION FOR YOU. YOU WERE OBVIOUSLY, USED TO ALL THE FLATTERING OF THE OPPISITE SEX, FOR THAT MATTER YOU HAD PLENTLY OF GAY MEN WANTING WHAT YOU HAD. YOU WERE SO PERFECT. I TRIED TO HOLD MY THOUGHTS AND JUST BE COOL LINDA DON'T LET ON THAT YOU ARE IN LOVE AT FIRST SITE. IGNORE HIM AND HE WILL COME TO YOU I THOUGHT... WELL HE DID, IF HE HADN'T OF RAN OUT OF GAS MY SOUL-MATE WOULD OF NEVER MET ME.... I KNEW HE WAS SO VERY SWEET ON ME TOO. DAMN, HE TURNED HEADS, AND I STILL TRIED TO KEEP MY KOOL. I WAS SO VERY PROUD OF MY CONTAINMENT OF THOUGTHS...

HE AND I WERE JOINED AT THE HIP FROM THAT DAY ON... THE FUNNY THING IS, IS THAT I HAD A DATE WITH THIS GUY I DATED A COUPLE OF TIMES, AN OLDER GUY, VERY WEALTHY, AND GOOD SEX AND I TOLD WILLIAM J RUIZ - OF SAN MATEO, CA. (MY FUTURE NEVER TO BE...) THE TRUTH THAT I WAS ON MY WAY TO MARIN COUNTY TO TAKE A VERY EXPENSIVE BATH IN CHAMPAINGE AND EXPENSIVE OILS, WITH MY LITTLE MILLIONAIRE. I JUST KNEW HE KNEW THAT I WAS HIS AND ONLY HIS FROM THAT DAY ON,.. AND I JUST WAS IN A DREAMSTATE EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY. I ENDED UP GASING UP WILLIAM ASKED IF I WOULD GIVE HIM A RIDE TO HIS CAR AND GET HIGH WITH HIM. OH MY GOD, BE KOOL, ANSWER CALMLY, WELL I REALLY NEED MY MILLIONAIRE DUDE TO BE HAPPY BUT YOU'RE VERY TEMPTING... CAN WE DO IT TOMORROW. I JUST DIED-INSIDE.. OMG WHAT HAVE I DONE? I MUST OF DONE IT RIGHT CUZ WILL, ENDED UP GETTING THE GAS, ME DRIVING TO HIM TO HIS TRUCK, AND THAT WAS ALL IT TOOK TO KNOW I WAS IN LOVE. I FELT HE FELT THE SAME, BUT TRIED TO LISTED AND NOT TALK AND DID NOT WANT TO SCREW THIS UP.. HE WAS A KEEPER-DEFINATELY. SO WE GOT TO HIS TRUCK.. A WHITE LIKE BRONCO THAT WAS PARKED SIX BLOCKS AWAY. I GOT OUT OF MY JEEP AND HE DID TOO WE JUST KEPT SMILING AT EACHOTHER. HE MADE LAUGH TILL I WAS GOING TO PEE IN MY PANTS. HE SAID, HAVE YOU SEEN JULIA ROBERTS IN THAT NEW MOVIE, "ERIN-(WAIT 4 IT) BROCK-A-*****" ? I COULD NOT BELIEVE THAT CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH I COULD OF DIED, LAUGHING, HE WAS JUST SO CHARMING, DRESSED IN ARMINI, JUST SO HOT LOOKING, NOT HOT SMOKIN HOT, LATINO , INTELLIGENT, SEXY, FUNNY, CLASSY, AND THE LIST WENT ON AND ON AS WE KICKED IT TOGETHER. WE WENT TO MY MILLIONAIRE'S FRIEND'S HOUSE AND HE WAITED TILL I WAS DONE WITH THAT BATH, AND IT WAS SO FUNNY TO THINK HE WAS JUST WAITING OUT THERE, KOOL WITH THE WHOLE DEAL, DUDE WAS KINDA MY SUGARDADDY AND WILL TOTALLY UNDERSTOOD.. IF WAS JUST SO SMART AND PERFECT. ALTHOUGHT MY MIND WAS ON WILL THE WHOLE BATH, I SNUCK OUT OF THAT MANSION OF HIS QUICK AND RAN PRACTINCALLY INTO WILL'S ARMS. I MISSED HIM AND HE HELD ME SO TIGHT,IT WAS SO ROMANTIC AND ELECTRIC. A MAGICALLY NIGHT OF LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. I REMEMBER HIS SMELL, EVERYTHING HE SAID, HOW HAPPY HE MADE ME FEEL. I KNEW I WANTED TO SPEND EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY WITH THIS MAN... HE WAS NOT WEALTHY BUT WORKED HARD FOR A LIVING SELLING DESIGNER SHOES AT NORDSTROM IN SAN MATEO, CA.

THEN I HAD A HEALTH ISSUE 7 YEARS LATER AND LOST MY THE "secure" PART OF MY PERSONALITY AND HE KINDA KICKED ME WHEN I WAS DOWN. HE MET ANOTHER GIRL WHO WAS ALMOST LIKE ME I HAVE TO SAY BECAUSE I KNEW...NEXT THING HE WAS BEING REALLY MEAN TO ME, JUST SARCASTIC AND MAD ALL THE TIME.. SOON I STARTED FEELING LUCKY TO JUST SEE HIM ONCE A WEEK, FOR THE BOOTY CALL OF COURSE. AFTER I MENTIONED THAT I JUST WANT HIM TO BE HAPPY EVEN IF IT ISN'T WITH ME, AND THAT IM SORRY HE DOESN'T LOVE ME ANYMORE...JUST BE HAPPY.

THEN I NEVER SAW HIM TILL ONE MONTH LATER. DURING THE TIME OF THE BREAKUP I HAD A NEVEROUS BREAKDOWN.. THEN WAS SO DEPRESSED. I JUST COULDN'T GET OUT OF BED, STARTED DOING DRUGS, AND THAT WASS ALL, I JUST WASN'T THE SAME. I WENT DOWN.. I SAW HIM ONE MONTH LATER AND I HAD A NEW BOYFRIEND, AND HE WENT AND GAVE ME A RIDE HOME ON HIS MOTORCYCLE AND TOLD ME, HE MADE A MISTAKE AND LETZ HAVE SEX AS HE PLOPPED DOWN ON MY BED. HE LOOKED SO GOOD I WANTED TO SAY YES, BUT IT WOULDN'T BE FAIR TO THE NEW BOYFRIEND, SO I SAID THE ONE WORD I NEVER DID SAY TO MY WILL, "NO". THE REASON BEING, IS THAT, ALL I COULD DO IS CONSIDER THAT I WOULLD DIE THIS TIME IF HE DID THAT TO ME AGAIN... I JUST COULD NOT EVER BE WITH SOMEONE WHO KICKED ME WHILE I WAS DOWN.. I THINK HE SHOULD OF SUPPORTED ME THROUGH MY HEALTH ISSUE AND WE WOULD BE TOGETHER FOREVER. I LOVE HIM STILL TO THIS DAY, BUT THE TRUST IS TOTALLY LOST, FOREVER... I THINK HE TOLD SOME FRIENDS' OF OURS, THAT HE WISHED HE WOULD OF MARRIED ME, IF HE HAD THE CHANGE TO DO IT AGAIN, HE WOULD OF NEVER LET ME GO.. I THOUGHT DAMN, TOO LATE THOUGH I THINK...I THINK OF HIM EVERYDAY AND DON'T EVER THINK I WILL GET OVER THIS..


THE END
Smokinhotblonde Smokinhotblonde
46-50, F
1 Response Dec 9, 2012

Idk sounds a little funny..... are u sure that's how that went down?