Can You Still Love Me If...

can you love someone who's heart has been taken and chopped up into tiny bits?
can you love someone who can't see anything good within themselves?
can you love someone who has nothing to live for?
can you love someone has never felt what it's like to actually be loved?
can you reach into the darkness inside of me and show me the light?
will you show me that some people are worth trusting?
Is there anybody who would even care enough to try....?
Arcentine Arcentine
22-25, M
3 Responses Feb 15, 2013

One thing I have learnt in life - you have to learn to be a hero to yourself. No-one is going to come and save you. Ask yourself what it means to be a hero, what does it look like? If you were a hero, how would you walk? What would a hero need to do to help you? Maybe even try walking around the house pretending you are a hero and see what it feels like and looks like. Look in the mirror and tell yourself you are the hero coming to rescue you. Do you like what you see? Is your posture different? Are you standing up straighter with your chest out, as opposed to slumped with your shoulders forward?

These are hard questions to answer, but it's really necessary. You cannot look to someone else to save you, that is too much of a burden, it's too much to ask and will only end in frustration and more hurt.. You have to find the inner strength to learn how to save yourself and how to love yourself because you are the only one who can change you. And accepting that is the first hurdle.

Also, you can never really fully trust anyone. To do so is foolish because we are all flawed human beings. People may not intend to hurt you or want to, but they will. I mean, we even hurt ourselves! And so the most important thing you can learn is resilience, so that when you do feel hurt or betrayed, it doesn't destroy you.

May I suggest you look into some long term counseling? It's amazingly helpful, if you make a regular commitment and go for at least a year, because the pain you have has probably been accumulated over years, and treating it is not something that is going to be quick or easy. I honestly don't know of any other way to get over depression, because you have to be the one to make changes in your life, and you need the help of a professional to guide you in this.

I wish you all the best and hope this has been helpful.

thank you. i was in counseling but i had to return to college

all i can say is wait . if you cant find the strength to pull through it on your own then you will find someone who is worth doing it for

i'm trying :/

but even if i found someone worth it, im worth it to no one

I am sorry to say this, but the answer is no. No one can love a broken heart. First, you have to learn to love yourself, to be comfortable by being yourself and self-sufficient in an emotional sense. Then, you can extend love to someone else and hope to get back at least a part of what you've invested. Otherwise, the words you've just written are just an attempt to a sad love poem.

hmm then i'm doomed to be alone i guess. i don't think i'll ever learn to love myself on my own

No, you are not. No one is doomed, unless they want to be. It's all a matter of perception. Maybe right now it feels better (or it is cool !?) to be depressed and read Baudelaire, but later on you will have to learn to be rational. And that is not a bad thing. It's just something additional. But if right now it feels better to be sad, then so be it. You will see, when you will meet people that make you feel better, step by step your confidence will grow.

ha i don't WANT to be sad or alone. I have tried not caring. I've tried just being me. I've tried reaching out to people. I have no friends, nobody cares or pays any attention to be. I wish i could just magically get over being depressed and magically make people like me but i'm sorry i'm all out of pixie dust. You act like i'm purposely trying to be depressed. I didn't break my own heart sweetheart. Trust me, I have no such desire to still be alive. I tried to end it and ended up in the hospital for two weeks. Nothing gets better, and people don't care enough to help-only judge. and you can be broken inside and still be perfectly able to love others thank you. It's not by my choice that no matter what I do and how good i treat other people I'm nothing but dirt to anyone.

Oh, i am so sorry if i have judged you too. I didn't mean to, i just thought that maybe you need some "tough love" :)) idk.....i am sorry if i was all flower power and stuff. I mean I know it's hard- for some more and for some less, I just don't like seeing sad or depressed people because i know life can be beautiful too. It's just that we have to be strong and i hate when i see every year a diffrent guy jumping off a 10-stories dorm just because....I know everyone has reasons. And I don't pretend i understand. All I am saying is that NOTHING is worth making you give up. Because you think that no one cares, but it's not like that. Alot of people do and alot more people would if you let them.

okay, sorry it sounded like you were judging haha. not having a good few months ya know? i want to get better. i just have no idea how. and i've seen nothing beautiful of life in a long time. I used to be strong but i broke down completely. and i try to let people care, but i had to resort to turning to EP because nobody cares or likes me where i live. and i know i have to try to love myself, but how do i begin to do that when apparently nobody else can

if you want, you can write to me whenever you feel like. I have bad days/months too... maybe i can try to understand

okay, thanks :) why are you having a bad few days/months?

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