No Such Thing As Prince Charming

Im happy to have found something a site somewhere.. to ask for some help and encouragement. My fiance  of 3 years told me heloved me all the time we had such a wonderful first two years then things got stressful when we began to look for a hosue together .He used to live at home with his mom while i have always been on my own since i was 18.Ive  been completely shocked and hurt by how fast things went down he came one one day after about 3 days of hanging out with a co worker who is a christian and was telling him that i was not good for him because I am older and because I do drink from time to time and he doesn't.He told me one night after going for a workout for the first time  in like a year to a gym with his new friend and his face was different he looked as if someone had told him enough bad things about me to discourage him about our future. how easy influenced are some. Well he tell me he needs time to spend alone with his family for 2 days and he will be back he just needs to clear his head. Personally I knew something was not right and told him if you leave me like this you might as well leave and take everything including his dog  which is another reason why we began to argue and i became so stressed . he was so selfish i am facing eviction now because of the dog being here and he took it however too late now I'm struggling to find a place fast. He left me right before he got paid and we usually take care of each other for the most part he was a fair guy till the end. I went to his house to see him one last time and while he fixed my car headlights I peeked into his chat history, i found a very happy chat from him and a female about simple talk and mild flirting. this was the same date on the chat as the night he left with everything to his moms..  while i cried for the entire night feeling devastated  he was having a great conversation . he didn't even look the same he was usually not concerned with his appearance and suddenly hes dressed in slacks and long sleeve shirt and almost the same hair cut as his co worker friend that  seems to be his idol..I feel lost scared confused rejected lonely depressed and have not slept nor eaten much Ive lost 10 pounds.cant think of anything else I'm so so so stressing and rethinking why and how fast and what a change in plans we had just put a contract on a house he was so happy about it so was i we hugged all the time made love all the time and i know now that he met this girl through that co worker could have been at church or at the gym w/e but she mentioned this guys name so i know he must have known her at least a week or more before he ran home to be single crushing everything we had.. joint accounts down payments for a home bills love happiness i cooked for him everyday i was so good to him i did have my bad moments like most people but nothing that a man who says i will never leave you and i love you and want to marry you get a home together go to school.. I went to school he went away. i don't know what to do I lost all my friends because of this relationship i was devoting all my efforts into it.all i can do is cry he has now changed his number and acted so cold towards me i pealed out after slapping him there's no turning back now. I have to find a way to keep my will a broken person right now. i dont ahve the courage to tel my mother and father id never said to them before this guy that i was going to get married and by a home he got me involed in his family and i in mine just to trash me and run back hom like a child. what the  Hell?

mysteriousmistymoon mysteriousmistymoon
36-40, F
14 Responses Mar 5, 2010

it would help if i left the house to find this guy and wasn't so scared of all the I can defiantly leave the ex in the past your right about wasting time with this person why should i give all my best and love to a child who wont even appreciate it in the long run? you know those things make scene to me so i can force my heart to shut up i know in my mind that there is hope for love i just want it to be real so badly i can have a man i get chased when i leave the house for anything men are kinda insane in they really scare me.. but mostly my heart can take anymore heart break so i want to invest time and real effort and thought behind the "choices i make?

I am a guy that's been divorced. You might feel hurt and rejected but he did you such a favor. Your now free to find the guy that is right for you. Just because he wasn't the right one doesn't mean he is not out there looking for you. Take the experience and learn from it. What did he say about you that bothered you? Is it something you should or could or even want to change? Was it his problem for just not excepting you for being you? He might seem like a jerk for hurting you but really it would have been more mean for him to not love you and get married anyway.

BTW this is an update post to let you know Im feeling so much better about the ordeal and he still writes me last time he wrote that he wished me a happy b day and btw im still in love with you.. he was begging to be back even lying about still being with me online to his blog on .. hes a fool and he cried too but im done with him im sick to my heart fromt he pain he cause enough not to date for a time to go to school!~ new goals~! ty all for taking the time to guide me along thats awesome .. !~

well as far as ladies sticking together .. Ive had so called friends who love me when im the life of the party but somehow when something happens they either abandon you or make it worse with critisizm.. Ive also run into plenty of shady characters miami is a difficult city women can be very petty with each otehr damn shame id love a true friend.

K14571 Agree with the "Re-Connect" with the Girlies.<br />
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Why do you ladies Dis-connect with each other?<br />
<br />
I have the same 10 friends from when I was 11. I am 48 this year.<br />
<br />
Friends get you though all this crap.<br />
<br />
Oh and Guess what, you may have to kiss a few frogs more but there are some Good Guys out there :-)

thank you your right IM glad i dont have kids and im glad we didnt get married things are so uncertain why bother>?

Some men are jerks but not all. :) Try to be thankful that you found out he was a liar before you bought the house together or had a kid or something. Then it would be even so much harder. I like your attitude...take advantage of the situation. Lose some weight. Feel good about yourself. Re-connect with some girlfriends. It won't take long and you'll be feeling better bit by bit.

your prolly right men are dogs:'(

ty but im just vulnerable as well lots of things are happening to make anyone feel a lil unbalanced.. read my new post you see whats going on in my saga .Im ugh confused

relationships can suck eh? <br />
you are handling it very well... the emotions will feel like you have been hit by a train, and you have to acknowledge that, but you are determined to move on and that's a good thing. <br />
so hang in there my new friend. *hugs*<br />
I know the feeling... working out helps a lot with the emotions and energy...and yeah there's a bit of 'look at what you are missing out on' revenge to. That ain't always a bad thing. :-)

hwy thanks I was reading all the comment im still getting the hang of the site i had not seen them till this morning. sadly as soon as i opened my eyes this morning with a cold and all i first thought of him and how i know hes at his parents in his bedroom and i wondered is he thinking of me now is he feeling this pain too? Most likely not..i bet hes snoring and drooling on his pillow waiting for his mother who papers her lil boy to bring guava pastries home..while i sit here all alone trying to feel ok enough just to go about my day make tea and hopefully have enough energy to do some type of helps me feel strong when im blue.It is so hard to let go but i need to in order to move on your so right!.And For the other comment i don't wanna get involved either I'm horrified tat this could happen can you give your heart to anyone once its mangled? i have to first pick up the pieces somehow. and try so hard not to cry and give in to the depression that's hitting me now. THanks for the suport you al Im glad atleast we ahve a place to vent. and Im here for you all too . we all go through pain why do it alone? thanks friends

im really sorry 4 what happened to you i can kinda relate if you read my story. in fact dont end up like me, you seem smarter than that. Im not gonna tell u 2 move on, i hate when people do that, if you could you would right? I sucks when you put your faith and love in someone just to have it seem like it never mattered. I think the hardest part for me was sticking to my guns and not taking back a cheater, i know i deserve better than that know matter how much i loved her, and you deserve better to. Its a real mind$%& when someone you think loves you and will spend the rest of there life with you all off a sudden doesn't want it anymore. Like i said i dont think suggesting ways, like most people on how to get over this would help, especially since im the last person who should be telling anyone how to move on, i just though you'd like to know that there's someone who feels your pain, and im truly sorry for what he did, he was wrong.

Damn, I can understand how you must be feeling. I've been through many bad experiences when it comes to guys. And what I have figured out isss...horrible to say is that all men are dogs! Ok maybe not ALL but most. I have no trust for them anymore, I know exactly how they think, what their motives are, and whatever. I believe men will cheat on you at least once in their lifetime. I know of so many guys who cheat on his wife or girlfriend and those women wouldn't even ever know about it! I know a guy who was able to cheat on his wife when they worked at the same place and they're always together and guess what she still doesn't know about it and never will. I don't know..I'm not trying to judge all guys out there, but I do NOT wanna get involved with any guy anymore until I'm wayyyyy older. Girl, just think that it all happened for a reason, obviously it was not meant to be, trust me in the future you will definitely find someone better. People are always living by the moment, they need things right there and then, we never look to the future because we don't know what's ahead of us, but a lot of times are things that are way better, things we never expected. This experience should have made you a stronger person. You deserve better. I know it's hard to move on and try to revoke those deep feelings you had for someone, but don't think too much about him. Think for yourself, your future, do the best for you and promise me you will never go back to that guy! lol.

yes it is horrible thanks for understanding.. he recently sent an e-mail saying he is looking through some of our pics together and he says i would like to remain friends I'm going to the gym now and working on getting fit... We were gonna join that gym together now hes going with that dude.. the co worker he Prolly thinks he can come back when he feels better but i could never forgive him for running and leaving me in this mess..I feel so lonely at night but I'm starting to think of great ways to deal with it at least the crying and suffering was killing me still not eating much.. now have lost 12 pounds. but its ok im eating healthy and my revenge is to get more fit than him he did get a lil chunky that last year and i made fun of him he said he didn't feel good about himself that's why hes doing this but i flipped out and i just think we could have worked on it together he says he still cares and everything ive stopped texting him and e-mailing finally im growing my pride I need to get strong! i could so use friends right now