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Brother Turns His Back On Family

I have always had a rough relationship with my brother.  We were raised in the same household with a single mother but turned out completely different.  He had his ways of dealing with life and I had mine, and we rarely ever agreed with each others choices.  The relationship that I had with my mom was very bad growing up, but we are a lot closer now.  My brother has always kind of used my mom for different things.  He had a son when he was still in High School and my mom has always been there for him financially.  My brother got married a few years ago and didn't even tell us for about a month after the fact.  This hurt my mom greatly, but she moved on and we all accepted this new woman and her two kids into our family.  We have spent each holiday and summer cookouts basically working around my brothers wife and their kids schedules, always planning way ahead so that everyone could attend each function.  When my brother didn't have money for birthdays and christmas, my mom would always give them money AND go over the top with gifts for everyone, while my brother and wife barely would remember moms bday or mothers day.  She has watched the kids on nights when my brother wanted to go out and has taken on the role of grandmother to all 3 kids.  She even rented them a house and payed their rent several times to keep a roof over their heads when my brother and his wife weren't able to.  But the sad part is , is that my brothers wife feels like we still haven't accepted her into the family because we don't make a big deal out of her birthday!!  My brother almost didn't come to our grandmothers birthday party because they were mad.  He now blows us off when we invite them to cookouts and things, even though at first he says he will be there.  He will cancel 2 hrs. before the scheduled time or just doesn't show up.  My mother doesn't have a lot of money and we have to know how many people will be at the cookout and the food goes to waste because we all make enough for him and his family.  His wife doesn't like that we don't take all 3 kids when we want to spend time with the grandkids.  I have 1 blood nephew that I was always close to, but if I go and pick him up by himself, it starts a feud with my brothers wife.  I really want to scream at my brother for putting up with that kind of behavior, but then I don't want my brother to break off contact and for us to never see my nephew.  I am going to have to confront my brother on his choices because my mom has done nothing but support him and his wife and kids and doesn't deserve this.

sreall1981 sreall1981 26-30 1 Response Jul 19, 2009

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Your brother is a plain baby/suck he got every thing handed to him when he had a kid and he wants and expcts more, take him aside and rip him a new one stop inviting him to functions since he cancels all the time.