Who Has He Become? Who Is He?

For Years Ive known hes Been into ****. Had red flags of cheating through our 18Yrs together...i was 18 When We Got together. The content of What I came across saturday night while Trying to download itunes next to him on the couch watching xmas movies with Our 3 boys...i cant wrap MY head around. Shemale videos craiglist personal ads for sex with men. Photos saved...vĂ­deos. I said What Is This. He said he physically Never cheated.hes Only loved me. Still does. Day By day he wants to work It out. How do I face the world. Im numb. Angry he Would hurt Ourprfect life. Broken hopes...future. Our children. Where can i go to process This. I Had no idea This level of deception...hesBlving another life. Help.
Beautybeastmode1 Beautybeastmode1
4 Responses Dec 3, 2012

Sorry for all the typos. I hope this posts well I am also used o Facebook. I did end up having sex with my husband a few days later after I found out and it was stupid but I guess my frame of mind was- I know I could still seduce him and it was true but after I just felt so yucky because I realized wait I'm gonna reward him for cheating on me. He basically though that meant all was forgotten and I just flt disgusted with myself. We shouldn't have to feel this way considering we did nothing wrong. Don't feel sick/disgusted the way I did because at the very end of this you have to realize this was the person you worked so hard to build dreams, hopes, and a future with for many years- how can you not release yourself into his arms as you have for so many years. The sleep will eventually come....later than sooner though. Just remember you need to take care of yourself for your kids for he has already moved on- we just want to ensure if it is moved on beyond cheating.

You are right it is indeed hard to believe and recover from. I remember the first time I found out all I could see was red hot anger and all I wanted was not to be involved with this liar. But then he really seemed to be sincere in his apology and I saw what a good father he was, our kids were only in first and second grade at the time. I believe people make mistakes...so we tried again. I hope thy can be your case. In my case it just has never stopped after god 5 years now, I just want the lies and having to be or feeling suspicious to stop. When I first found out a friends talked to me at the time and told me two other couples she had known of. She said one woman decided to stay but still ended up divorcing her husband when he cheated again. The other woman she just knew right off the bat she couldn't trust him.

I gave my marriage another shot because I knew a marriage took a lot of work especially with kids. You don't want to fall into the trap of everything is about them because your marriage would wither but how can you not when you look ino the eyes of your own children. I realized along the way I lost sight of my marriage relationship and made it all kids. So I gave it another shot to see if it could be worked out and to not have any regrets later on.

I may not be the best person to give this advice but I guess the question you might try to look deep inside of yourself would be- what type of woman do you think you could be? I thought I could be te one to work it out and well let's just say he dissappointed my by continuing the cheating even if it was emotional cheating.

I don't know if I helped but the ball is in your court- as hard as it is, you will have to decide where you want it to go. I hope to hear from you again if nothing else just to talk. Believe me, even just pewin nd letting it out will help. Take care.

I agree, my husband probably has the same as I posted this morning. I feel for you and I just joined EP this weekend and already I have felt it helps.

Please See MY reply below. It Is meant for You too. i Havent Been able to figure out This site Really. Im used to facebook Set up.

Just stopped by to encourage you; we have a similar story. EP has helped me tremendously- first to be able to say whatever and just get it all out and second to have the support of those who have been there or are there with you. No one can decide for you, but I will say that if you want to heal and preserve your relationship it is possible- hard but possible. Whatever you decide, you will have our support!

How do You repair When It consumes You. Slleeping pills arent Working. I Havent slept since Friday night When MY life was Our life. I Feel hes lies. He wont tell me About anything physical...he says he Had an obsession jacking Off. i Remember bruises on his hips. Hemmoroids. Constipation. I read This Is all related to anal sex. I Love the man i married. He Is gone. I See someone else Now. I Had sex with him Last night Just to heal the lust for him That i miss. The confort and security. I am sickened Right Now