Little Over A Week Vent Session

it has been a little over a week since i found out that my husband cheated and got the other younger girl pregnant. im dealing with so many emotions and yet feel as if i dont have any emotions at all sometimes. i told him last night i dont think i could deal with all the new info i have learned and that it is over. i felt like i wouldnt be able to move past it all. he slept with another women (if you could call a 20 year old girl that) in our house in our marriage bed. I just found out last night that he was the one to go pick her up and drop her off the second and third time he cheated. the first she rode with someone which means other know he is a cheater and i feel i look stupid. i told him there is no way he didnt think of me when he was driving over to get her or driving back to our house. there is no way that after they sat and flirted in our house and then took her to our bedroom that me or our life together didnt pop up in his mind. when he was kissing her and having sex with her its not possible that he didnt for one second think "my wife will leave me if she ever finds out"!!! when i asked him about if he had these thoughts he agreed and said he had..... BUT YOU STILL DID IT!! not once but twice after the initial time. i just feel betrayed. how could i possibly be expected to deal with another girl being pregnant with possibly my husband child. and guess what this little girl is supposed to be a lesbian and yet all of a sudden you decide you want to sleep with a man and he happens to be married!!! she knew he was married from the begining it wasnt a secret!!!! and he tells me she has her sister and mom calling his phone talking about taking her to appointments!!!!! why would he take her to these early on appointments as if they are together as if he is not married!! of course she wants him to be involved she is young and pregnant with her first child! it makes me sick to my stomach. and the fact her family is calling his phone as if they can do that!!! what the hell makes thiem think this should be anything other than descraceful??? why would they make it seem as if this is ok and they will be one happy family NEWS FLASH HE HAS A FAMILY AND YOUR NOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!! i get light headed just typing this bc i feel so sick about it. i dont know how to deal with it all and if it werent for my daughter i wouldnt even question it I WOULD BE GONE! at least i think i would since i do i will never know what i would have done and all the other "what ifs"
heavenslilangl14 heavenslilangl14
26-30, F
2 Responses Dec 3, 2012

i dont get it, why r u still with him? just get out and become independent.

Once again, I am sorry to read your ( very well written!) story here. It is a shame that he was that dumb.
Please don't be too involved with thinking(obsessing) about this other girl, and her mom, sister,family dynamics and all of that.
All of that is not your concern, at all, let him deal with it. Your pain and anger should be directed at him ( not even the 'lesbian'; forget her.). I hope you can be with family, girlfriends, etc..... Best of luck to you.