Where Im At

so I have been dealing with my emotions after finding out my husband cheated. I have prayed about what i should do and listened to all his begging and pleading. I listened to him cry so many times i lost count and he has done everything i have asked him to do without question. i decided to take a couple days to myself so that i could think and sort out my feelings. That was hard bc even though he betrayed me we have always talked about everything together. He literally was my best friend, the one i wanted to share things with when something exciting, sad, surprising, or even mundane was going on in my life. however, i took those days to assess the situation and how i imagined my life (with or without him). Even through those couple days i found it difficult to not speak to him. Im still so mad at him and want to rage and call him names but even with all that i still just want to hear his voice! I have decided im not ready to call it quits yet. I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS! no one has to live my life but me and im not ready to leave this man that i love yet. I told him this is his last and final chance and he needs to be open to do anything i need to heal or to heal our marriage and he has whole heartedly agreed. He cried when i told him i would give our marriage one more try. He said he was so overcome with me giving him another chance and he loved me so much and will do whatever to keep me that he could not hold his emotions in. Im still in shock and im sure this will be the hardest thing we have ever been through. I know when i do get home for the first time in almost 3 months that it will feel like fresh wounds. He said he will help me get through this. I hope all these "he said" statements follow through with action. Until proven otherwise im trusting and having faith in God.
heavenslilangl14 heavenslilangl14
26-30, F
4 Responses Dec 6, 2012

wow D; I cryed a lil

Let me suggest for you to have a scenario in your head for what if he cheats.<br />
a scenario only to yourself.<br />
I think you are in front of 2 options:<br />
1) leave him at that moment and right away. no hesitation.<br />
2) really accept that he can't be a monogamist, and :<br />
-- a) learn to live with it without it harming you.<br />
-- b) allow him under condition that he tells you every time.<br />
-- c) allow him and obligate him to tell you before hand. <br />
(i'd suggest that one in case of acceptance)<br />
-- d) let him to it under your supervision (at home for example) or with including you in it (whether by only presence or by actual participation)<br />
<br />
With option 2, you guarantee his loyalty and love to you, but "share" his penis.if you choose this one, he cant be classified as cheating anymore. <br />
it this must be going only as long as loyalty and love are to you and to you only. if this one is broken, return to option(1) immediately.<br />
<br />
if you choose neither in case it happens again; with all due respect and my advanced apologies, you'd be a sucker, weak, stupid and really deserving what's happening to you. <br />
<br />
I think these are pretty much the options you have as simple as i have put them.<br />
<br />
Please take no offence in what i just came to tell you. I like to put facts right in front of your eyes.<br />
<br />
Hope I'm helping.<br />
regards, <br />
A

I am glad to hear and hope to hear your success story also. Hang in there!

You courage is awesome and I'm glad that you have decided to give your marriage another chance. I will continue to pray that God heals you, him, and your relationship. Now that the decision has been made, it will take some strength to stick to it, but I can't wait to hear your success story!!!