Husband With No Emotion

I have only been married a year and half and my husband has stepped out of our marriage 4 times. This past month I have decided to step away but I feel like I have no closure. He has not once tried to pursue me since I left its like he is completely okay with that he lost his family. All the times I caught him I gave him ample amount of opportunity to tell me he wasn't happy or that he wanted a divorce but he always said that he wanted me to stay that the other women didn't mean anything to him that it was a problem he had. I know for a fact that I am an idiot for even staying all the times I did but I didn't want to loose my family and be a single mom again. We are now living two hours apart I came back to my home town with both of our children. When I talk to him on the phone he never has any comforting words even when I am balling my eyes out. I know I want a divorce but with showing no kind of emotion it is driving me crazy sometimes I wish he would say YES I want a divorce too.
Mascoto Mascoto
7 Responses May 21, 2013

That is so sad, we women love with our whole being and we can't be like men and just shut our emotions and feelings off overnight. They have done us wrong in the worst possible way and we still love and care for them. When we know they don't feel the same about us! I'm sorry you have to go through this, but when YOU feel ready then you make the leap. How can he not show any emotion even when u are pouring your heart out? I think he has detached himself! Hopefully, things will get easier for you!

Retreading your story I wanted to add that he does not show emotion because he wants you to do the work of a divorce. It sounds to me like he is already in the process and is using his "non-emotion" as a negotiating strategy. Get a lawyer! Get evidence of his affairs.

Use reverse psychology.Act happy on the phone,dont make time to talk to him,get out and socialize,tell him your busy.I know its hard but suck up all the pain you have and do the opposite.Either it will work or it wont but before you know it you wont have to act anymore.The pain will still be there but there will be happiness too.

He has no emotion other than the desire for sex. These other women mean nothing to him just like you mean nothing to him. The only thing he cares about is sex. Sadly he is the man you married. Everything he said to you was an act and front so he could have sex with you. Him marrying you probably was for his own security rather than for your relationship. You said yourself he has no emotion so everything he does is cold and calculated.

I hope you can move on.

Even if you go back to being a single mom your a strong woman ,and if he cheats like that and shows no emotion he is bad as a tomcat or a 15year old boy that does not have the balls to brake up with a girl .I was just with a girl that was a drug addict that was only nice to me or wanted to have sex to get me to buy her pills and drive her around . that lasted about a week and a half before i cald it off,no way was i going to throw my self at the first girl i dated in the last five years just to be used by some one that just wants to use me at every turn when i can find a real human being with emotions i can feel , not just some husk walking around looking for a quik poke or a cheap high . so not worth the drama ,stress or time .
I piked up what i know from being the guy a girl cheat on her man with , she did not think i would go out of my way to blow her **** out of the water and tell all these guys what was going on .
Stand against the cheaters
"Real men have the balls to end a relationship before cheating"

How about conselling together? It could also be that some time apart may make him realize what he is losing. Take care of the children too though. Do your best to shield them from this while you work things out or make your decision. You can always reach out if you want. Time away may do you good as well. Also try to find other things to occupy your mind and get together with friends and family for support. Really consider the counselling though.

Okay so I am going to ramble on some more this last affair he had lasted 7 months with our next door neighbor part of this while I was pregnant another par of it after our baby was born. It's like I went into to complete freak out mode I had our whole house packed and put on the market to sale in 4 days and our house sold in about a week. All I could think about was I/we had to get away from her. Once we settled into our new place and I wasn't going 90 to nothing I realized I hated him everything he did pissed me off to the max. Now even as crazy as this sounds I never punished by not pleasing him sexually I was to afraid that he would go find somewhere else again but that to even became a disgusting chore for me. I finally snapped and left on Saturday with what ever would fit in my vehicle.

Good. You didn't have a marriage, not really. I think you've done the right thing. Was he the role model you wanted for your family? I could agree to the counseling if you had some foundation but only married a year and a half, cheated on you four times, no remorse? My heart goes out to you. It won't be easy but at least you do not have the emotional burden of a lousy marriage.