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Can Anyone Help?

Skyler is also known as my sunshine. Skyler is 9 1/2 yrs old and has Asperger Syndrome which is on the lower end of the Autism spectrum. Along with Asperger's Skyler also has PDD, ADD, ADHD,OCD, and a few other learning disorders. All this being said he can be a challenge at times because of the behavioral problems that come along with these type of disabilities and some times things that are simple for other kids his age are very hard for him to understand, but HE IS MY SUNSHINE. Ever since Skyler was 14 mnths old I began to realize that he wasn't like other kids his age, he was perfect on the outside and still is and he is soo compassionate it brings tears to my eyes as I think of all the times he has made me smile in my darkest hours. He just knows when someone is feeling down, he will walk up to a person and ask them if they need  a hug if he feels like maybe they do. He is such an amazing kid despite the "humps in the road" I don't have enough room here to explain all of the amazing things about my son to you but believe me there are many.  Our biggest problem right now is his education, he has been in the public school system since he began school and he did fail his first year of kindergarten and was placed in special education the following year as well as occupational therapy and speech therapy. My problem is this.... he is in 3rd grade and they plan to push him through to 4th grade this following school year yet he has roughly  a 1st grade reading level. I don't feel comfortable with this and am getting no answers from the school system on why he isn't progressing even though he is getting the assistance of their programs. The only thing I can really come up with is that when in the special education classes he is not the only child in there and he really needs the one on one attention to help him learn, so now I wonder if I should pull him out of public school and home school him. He can still get the occupational and speech therapy through a local agency, its just a matter of me questioning myself more or less. Am I good enough to teach him all he needs to know?.... Can I teach him all he needs to know to graduate High School?..... How can I afford all the supplies I need to home school him when we live on such a tight budget? All these questions and more keep running through my mind. I know together Skyler and I can get him through this. I know we can do it. It's just a matter of cost..... If anyone reading this has any ideas please let me know.

angelzevil angelzevil 26-30, F 4 Responses Mar 19, 2010

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i battled main stream school for yrs with my aspergers child, no one wanted to listen or help, in his last yr of secondary school where he was near to leaving to go on to college or work i was so sick of the school calling me up and threatening him with expulsion i eventually fought back, i took someone from the autistic society with me into the main stream school and they asked all the right questions to the school about what they were doing to support my son in the subjects he was being challenging behaviour in, i have to say through fighting to make sure he got educated i battled on and didnt give in, my son eventually got help in the subjects he struggled in, he caught up with his course work, he did really well in his exams and he made me the proudest mom ever, teachers looked at him as a troublesome lad who would leave school with near enough no exam passes, i am so proud because my son proved them all wrong, he left school with A,s and nothing lower than a C grade for his exams, he went on to college for a few yrs studying to be a chef, he last week left college passing his course to be a chef, and also the other week he went and passed his Navy test so hes now waiting to be called up for the Navy aswell as applying to work in a huge corporate hotel chain while he waits to enlist in the navy, this is the boy who was always kicked out of schools, who was looked upon as a troublesome lad an i know who was also looked upon as going no where in life, my feelings on it...he can stick his 2 fingers up to those who doubted him an he has proved hes my genius son.xx

Hello to Skylar's mom. I was you about 15 years ago. In fact, my youngest son was the first child in the county to be diagnosed with Asperger's back in 1996 when it was first added to the DSM-IV. And we did it all -- private school, public school, charter school and homeschooling.<br />
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Looking back, I honestly have to say (and DS agrees) that the homeschooling option worked best, at least. for us.<br />
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I was lucky that I could quit work and stay home full time and focus on our son. It is a lot of work to homeschool and do it so that the outcome is beneficial, but it is possible...and you don't have to spend a lot of money.<br />
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For us during the elementary and early middle school years, I just researched a lot and let my son lead where he wanted to go as far as subjects. I used the books by E.D Hirsch ("What Your XXX Grader Needs To Know) as a guide, but really let my son guide me. There are lesson plans, etc. on the Internet that are free and easy to reproduce/use. It just takes a lot of time and research, but once you get the hang of it, it just becomes like an assigned job.<br />
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We joined a local homeschool group that gave us access to state and national testing (MEAP and the ITBS through the homeschool group and the SAT through the Midwest Talent Search) so that I could gauge how our son measured up against other kids. This helped assuage my husband's fears that our son wasn't getting an adequate education. <br />
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When he got older we enrolled our son in the local community college. Many states allow non-graduating students to take classes with the approval of the student's guidance counselor. For homeschoolers, that "guidance counselor" is the parent, so you can sign the approval for attendance. <br />
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We also enrolled our son in an accredited distance learning high school so he could get an accredited diploma. We chose American School in Lansing, IL, but there are probably others. The only thing I would recommend is to make sure the school is accredited....otherwise transc<x>ripts, etc., may be meaningless (our son was able to enroll in college with a nice hefty scholarship to boot with this high school education without a problem).<br />
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Rules for homeschooling differ state to state. I would recommend approaching a local homeschool group to talk to the leader. They likely can provide resources that will help you decide if the decision is right for you.<br />
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Good luck with your mission!

I feel as if the public school system is failing my son becuase he is not "normal" and as a parent I only want him to have the oppertunities that are available to other children. I was planning on starting college in a few months myself to get my bachelors degree in social work but my son needs me and I can always go when Im older. I feel like with enough support Skyler and I can do this together but finding the support is the hard part. My goal is to help Skyler be all he can be and I know that person is an amazing one. Its a long hard road to be a parent of a disabled child but this is what I have been given and Skyler and I will push through this together.

i am in a simmillar situation and i think you are so brave to even concider home school