Kicking Her Out Was Best Or Us Both.

My daughter is almost 22. Three years ago when she was 19 we moved house to a complete new area. My son was coming up 21 and had a good job so wanted to stay where we were. My daughter, since turning 16 became a nightmare....skipping school, smoking, sleeping around (soon followed an abortion) and generally not giving a **** about anything. We stood by her - gave her leeway, talked to her, asked her to be more considerate by phoning if she wasn't coming home. I don't think we asked anything more of her than any loving parent would. (My husband is not her real father but he has brought her up since she was 1 so she hasnt known anything else and her own father hasnt had that much to do with the kids.....not through lack of loving - he knew he wouldn't be the best dad and appreciated my husband for being a good father)
She didn't do well at school but decided to go to college to do hairdressing - something she has shown interest in since very little - so we bought her all the kit she needed. She started the first year and was enjoying it...her behaviour changed a little. She was actually going to college but her method of scoialising was still the same. She passed the first year and we were so proud and we told her so. we have always praised the kids - we have disciplined them when necessary but always gave reasons for punishments.
The second year of college started and she got a reputation for being "easy" and said the other girls on the course were nasty to her. I saw her tutors; tried to get her to see how if she changed her behaviour things would ease up but nothing worked. In fact she got worse. Eventually she dropped out of college so we told her she had to find a job. Our son talked to her - they are very close - but she became more of a *****. I hate to say that but she was. She wouldn't even look for a job. She was horrible. It got to the point where I was glad when she stayed out all night because i wouldn't have to see her. I never told her that though. I did have some serious talks with her but she didn't care.
So when the time came to move I told her that she couldn't move with us if she didn't have a job. She said she'd move in with our son but he told her there was no chance of that! There are plenty of job opportunities where we moved to but she refused to apply for anything.
So, a week before we moved she contacted her aunt and asked if she could stay with them and that I was kicking out. She agreed and my daughter went.
It has been the making of her. She's woking and training to become a pub manager for a national chain; she has good friends that show her that life isn't about being easy and most of all she's lovely and I miss her to bits. She's 2 hours away but she phones nearly every day and texts every day. She tells me she loves me - something I didn't hear for a long time and she's happy which is all I ever wanted.
I just wanted to share in case you are going throught the same thing......it will get better.