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Destroyed

I got a dui after getting off of work and watching a boxing event, got pulled over and the rest is just plain crap, I was a truck driver, and the dui cause me to lose my job, since without a license, so after taking my license, the fines came in,with the threat of if I don't pay the fine, I would receive jail time, again after I was forced to quit , then to make matters worst, was lable an alcohlic and forced to have treatment, also this is going into my record, I drank once maybe twice a month before this all happen, now unemployed and in this time with the way jobs are, I know that I'm going to lose my home, I feel depression every day and see no way that I can overcome it, I made a mistake in driving that night, but should it ruin my life for a 15 minute ride? I stay at home more than ever now, finding myself not wanting to be around anyone because of the sadness that I feel
daedae513 daedae513 51-55, M 75 Responses May 7, 2011

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I drove a truck since 1998, and got a DUI in 2011. That ruined my life. My driving record was spotless up until then. I had a family of two boys, nice home, and a beautiful wife. Also a great job with a supermarket chain driving truck for them for 10 years. Great pay, benefits, pension. It all came to end on the year of doom. My wife and I were going through a divorce, fighting over our kids. Lost our home. Went from a nice home to renting a room. Left the bar depressed and got pulled over. Got my first DUI. About 4months after fight ing my duiDUI and for my job. I lost both. Its been almost 4 years since. I haven't getting on my feet its been a daily struggle. I been food stamps. Working at the car wash, labor ready, cleaning windows, whatever I can do to make ends meet. My first year I only made $7000. Yeah I used to think and act like it wasn't fair. I no longer think that way it doesn'tdo me any good. I get up everyday and be grateful. I lwlearned my lesson the hard way. Im now over 3 years sober. I never want to drink again its beena big price to pay. Its time to move forward.

You know. I could only read a couple of these response before I had to sign up. All up that judge look in the mirror and ask have u ever did anything that u did not get caught for?? that just maybe consider a crime or others would judge u for but just really was not something u would not normally do? I work in a field where I see all kinds of people of all walks of life that life are ruin from this. yes some of them should be there but many of them just made a bad choice and yes it just might of cause harm to someone else but didn't the police who are there for the reason to protect found them before they made a bigger mistake thank goodness, so yes they should have to pay a price but not their every thing. it is crazy what they have to do. can u do what u every day without your driver license? then by the way we want u to be at the probation office so many times a week or month, make sure u bring money, we don't care if u loss your job, we don't care if u have no family or friend to drive u but if u get caught driving you will be arrest again at which point u will spend time in jail and when u are done with that u will be an habitual offender and not able to ever get your license again. So all of u that judge this man be sure that u didn't go partying when u turn 21 and maybe drove, or maybe smoke a joint when you where a kid, that is a crime, left the densest after getting some gas or try anything that just might of been harmless in your mind, I could go on there are so many little not meant to harm another a human mistake that we do that what we human and this man should yes had to pay a fine, got in trouble. But by no means does that make him a bad person a bad truck driver come on!! but the laws just might make him on. trust me in my field I see it all the time they come in the first time a reasonable scared what is going to happen to me, I am sorry, I cant believe I did that. to I just could do what they what me to do, I couldn't find a job. I couldn't pay the fines, I loss everything what did they what me to do? and these are not people that fit what people think of criminals these are your normal everyday people who this law is making it impossible to make it unless they have money or a lot of family support. what is even funny to me these people pay more than let say some one who comes in for selling drugs that person can do couple days in jail pay a fine, do a little probation, and that is it. now depends on amount and how many times they have been caught but u get the point. first dui and u lose your license one year if you refuse to blow 5 years. now I do agree with if you get more than one dui then ya get what you get but everyone can make a mistake and pretty much anyone I know including myself, is honest has at one time or other as done something that can be consider against the law but didn't do it to harm anyone was just having a little fun. so dude I am sorry what You going threw and I do not think it is fair but promise u that you are not the only one. and it does not make u a bad person. it happens to all walks of life from the very high class to the very poor. I was just talking about this the other day when I got a college kid back in what could we do to help him out? said come on this is crazy. I was told that it was not my job to worry about that. I was not a law maker. to those who have lost a love one from somebody drinking and driving that is not the same has this.

Yes I lost my job and then was told that I had to pay fines or face jail, was told that I had to take classes at 250 or face jail,was told that it would stay on my record for life, what they failed to tell me was that speeders causes more deaths that drunk drivers, they failed to tell me that tailgaters causes more accidents than drunk drivers, they failed to tell me that police officer that are caught driving drunk does not lose his job nor does the judge that is caught also, what they did tell me was i should have known better, ( doesn't the cop and the judge know better since one enforces the law and one administer it ) I was out of work for three years before I was able to work again, no food stamps no medicare, no welfare, I had to fight this battle on my own, I was just about broke before I found work again, and I know that some were not as lucky as I was and may have lost everything behind this law, I no longer drink and I no longer think that our government is there to help us, they are only in it for themselves and for the money that they can get any

(I should note in passing that the state’s claims to be trying to make our roads safer by outlawing and persecuting drunk drivers should be taken with a grain of salt, to say the least. Approximately 1 million Americans are killed every 25 years on America’s socialized road system, and the state has done virtually nothing in the way of reforming these death traps — besides focusing its attention on drunk drivers. The socialist planners of America’s roads apparently only care if drunk drivers kill people, and don’t care a whit if drivers are killed through their own negligence, mismanagement and typical socialistic incompetence [PDF].)

It all sounds so reasonable: because of their "impaired judgment," drunk drivers discount the danger of dying or hurting other people, so the state must implement harsh laws that discourage drunk driving even more. The problem with this idea, however, is that the state’s penalties for drunk driving are extremely lenient when compared to what could possibly occur as a natural consequence of drunk driving — like, death, disfigurement or a lifetime in prison. As such, it is naïve at best to think that the state’s relatively mild form of punishment could possibly dissuade a man from driving drunk, when not even the risk of death was able to discourage him from doing so.

In other words, what the state and other logic-eschewing groups would like for us to believe is the following:

When a man is drunk, his "impaired judgment" makes him discount the possibility of getting into a horrible accident that might kill or injure him or someone else. As a result of discounting this risk, he is likely to go ahead and drive drunk anyway.
This same drunken man, who thinks he can cheat death on the highway, will suddenly see the light, shut off his engine, and walk home if the state merely threatens him with a stint in jail if he drives.

Do you know that speeder's are the cause of more deaths and accidents than drunk drivers, so do you think that we should throw every speeder in prison or jail for their first offense, I know that you are not a speeder and that you never , ever did it, and I know that you wear a bluetooth while driving, when I grow up, i want to be perfect like you, NOT

Don't let it destroy your life. I agree you should not drink and drive but if courts would help people with substance abuse problems get them help give them real rehabilitation instead of putting them in prison with rapists, killers, etc. our country would be so much better off. They hit you with fines but take away your license and you can't work. Does that make sense? PUT interlock devices and make them work permits. Even use wrist or ankle monitors, curfews but don't destroy someone's life and their family. Too many politics. Forgiveness is a gift. I know I would be destroyed if a loved one of mine were killed but I would also be destroyed if putting a family member in prison. Let that person get out and work and make a contribution to society.

I can understand both sides of this issue,although I to have
been turned upside down due to my dui 6 years ago exactly two days from now Sunday 6/8. Let me ask you who seem to be bashing this man a little over his statement. I take full responsibility for getting behind the wheel that day.I have paid more than 5k, & many many hours/days meeting all criteria that was demanded by law,before finally all were met.I lost my career,& all that branches from it. My issue is alot of states if not all,will not allow you to expunge or seal a dui,no matter how much time has passed.I see employment apps. that read....no major felonies in last 5 yrs,while stateing 1 or the other,no dui's...period,or ocassionally,no duis in last 10 years.DUI is a horrible offense & justice needs to be taken,but to have it follow you for next 30,40,50 yrs,the rest of your life,without any options is & does not make any damn sense.Do the crime,do the time..,,,not life.u

Yes it is sad that a DUI is treated as a life sentence, and whats worst is that speeders count for more highway deaths than intoxicated drivers yet a speeder isn't treated with the lost of his job, his insurance isn't cancelled and it does not follow him for the rest of his life, the government will not admit it, but they screwed up on this one and also the revenue that they would lose is too great for them to admit the injustice of it all, so now we have kids 19 years old marked for life and if not then it is not fair to the people that have been. The only way that we will be able to change this is to ban together, alone we are nothing but together we are a giant with a loud voice

Couple things here:<br />
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1) It is completely wrong to discriminate against someone ba<x>sed on irrelevant criteria, in this case, past acts. So I do understand your frustration at not being able to find a job because of past convictions, although if the convictions are related to the job in question it would be justified - just as it would be fair not to hire someone with a conviction of embezzling for a position as an accountant, for example, it is perfectly reasonable not to hire someone with a DUI for a position involving driving or access to alcohol and/or drugs.<br />
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2) Many of you seem to not understand the purpose of the DUI laws. You state that because no harm was done in your cases and many others in that no persons were injured and no property damaged, it is unjust to punish you. More broadly, you suggest the laws themselves are unjust and that if you were to injure yourself or damage your property, that is the purpose of insurance. Well, the purpose of the DUI laws are not to prevent self-harm, but harm to others. <br />
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Every time you drive under the influence of alcohol it is not only your own life you risk (who gives a **** about property when we are talking about living and dying?), but the lives of all you encounter. And you have no right to assume that risk for everyone else. And in the event of a collision with another car or pedestrian, the odds are it won't be the intoxicated person who will be severely injured or die, it is the person who wasn't drinking (this is a fact of biology). So we have to have laws that punish people who take these risks in order to reduce the incidences and thereby the deaths.<br />
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So just do the right thing, for you and for everyone else. Either don't have that drink or arrange other transportation BEFORE you have it, it's not hard. And you have to live with the consequences of your actions, I mean, really, when you do wrong, that's on you. Except for the discrimination thing, like I said. But if you are still acting the same way, and ba<x>sed on these comments, a lot of you are, I have a hard time feeling sorry for you at all. No one should get a second DUI.

First let me say that my career was as a driver and I did NOT seek employment in that field, I tried to obtain employment in every field that I was qualified for EXCEPT as a driver
2nd this may be so as far as to prevent harm to others and even yourself, but how many other laws convicts someone because of what if, that is the stupidest and unfair law in the books, does a person do jail time because they think that he may rob a bank someday
and 3rd people like you ( the pure people ) that I am not looking for understanding and sympathy from, I seek out people that are going through the same pain as I , I understand that there are people that can be so perfect that they never do anything wrong and should be put on a pedestal , but in reality that only belong to a NEWBORN baby, ALL OTHERS MAKE MISTAKES !
And also, you need a life, nothing better to do than to seek out situations where you can deliver hurt or pain or your UNWANTED opinion , GET A LIFE

That is precisely what I said about employment, so I don't know what you're mad about on that account. I said that people are often unfairly discriminated against based on criminal records when in reality they should only be disqualified for a minority of jobs (and probably not indefinitely either as people change - if someone had one 20 year old offence from their youth, for example, and nothing since, I don't think I'd hold it against them unless it was particularly disturbing). So I agreed with most people here except those who wanted driving jobs. Believe it or not I care a lot about justice and discrimination of any form does not serve that goal.

However, if you post online in a public area, you get responses and not all will agree entirely with your own view. I was merely responding to a post, as is the purpose of this website. If you cannot deal with views differing from your own, then you had better stop talking to others, online or off. And as for making mistakes, yes, people do, but they also have to live with the consequences, learn from them, and not blame others and I find none of that is going on here. And I find no understanding whatsoever of the importance of the safety of others. You don't care that you put others at risk, you just care that a) you got caught and b) you think the law was unfair. Yeah, everyone makes mistakes, but I own mine. Can you say the same?

Because it isn't in writing does not mean that people aren't happy that they did not hurt someone from a night of drinking and driving, have you every heard of a person say that they were drunk and upset that they didn't hit someone ? There are people that have had wine with there dinner and charged with a DUI , and I agree that maybe I am sensitive about this subject but that is because of the level of punishment that I received for this offense, many people drive while under the influence from judges to teachers, the law is not the same for all when it comes to a DUI, a police officer can keep there job if caught with a DUI and so can a judge, the same professions that enforce the laws while others life are left in a wreck, and the law itself is a joke, the money that they charge for fines are used for everything else but the stopping of driving while under the influence, in my town there was an article stating that they put in new water sprinklers with money that they got from the fines of DUI offenders, so again I am sorry if I upset you and also for the rambling , it's something that I picked up from having a DUI, and trust me , I blame no one but myself for being in this position

I am not saying that they actively desire to hurt people, I am saying that they are being inconsiderate of the safety of others and just thinking of themselves. I think if someone did drink and drive with this attitude and actually did cause someone to come to harm, this attitude would change - they would likely be devastated that they had ever taken the chance. But the problem is that they think they won't hurt anyone, that they are just risking their own safety and this is not the case.

As for the inequality of the justice system, that sort of thing happens for pretty much all crimes. Some people are punished more harshly than others and some more lightly simply because they have money, or influence, or status. It is wrong, but it happens. It is even more evident with drug crimes. How often do you see a rich person doing a mandatory minimum sentence for drug possession? But that is not an argument for not punishing those who don't have wealth or power. That is an argument for punishing everyone fairly and cracking down on those who evade justice. Although, by your own argument, not all those people should be fired in the event of a DUI offence as not all of their jobs are relevant to the offence - a teacher certainly not.

And by the way, impaired is impaired, regardless of how many glasses of wine or other alcoholic beverage it takes. It may only take one for some people. In my case it probably would only take one given the totality of circumstances (body mass, alcohol tolerance, medications, etc.). And I'd take the keys off anyone I was with who I thought had too much and I'd drive them home myself if I had to, to hell with any inconvenience.

Why are you commenting on this post? If you only motive is to judge others, pick a different blog. No one asked for your sympathy so **** off

I don't have to justify why I posted here as this is a public site and I can post wherever I like. But I would have thought it obvious. People comment when they feel they have something to contribute to a discussion, or in your case, to hurl abuse. In my case, I felt that something was not being said and needed to be. I may have said some things that people did not wish to hear (probably because they are hard truths for those who are in such a situation), but I have the right to exercise free speech and unlike you I was not rude or aggressive.

As for judging, everyone judges every day about many things. Judging people or things is just forming opinions or perspectives. What you are saying is that you do not like my opinion on this issue. You prefer what the other people have said, you prefer their judgments of themselves and others, and do not wish to hear me. You can choose not to read my posts, but you cannot force me not to post them. And you cannot make what I said untrue either, which is why I suspect you dislike it so much.

And finally, this entire blog is a huge demand for sympathy from anyone who reads it, so I do not see how such a demand was not made of me. The OP boils down to 'I broke the law and now the consequences are really, really bad, please feel sorry for me and others like me'. And whether or not all of these consequences are justified or just some of them is irrelevant, it is a demand for sympathy. And the moment I read this, said demand was placed on me.

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As far as I know it does not get better. I lost my license in 2008 to my second DUI. It was a living hell. I thought when getting through a sobriety court, all the random drug tests, support groups, pure anxiety for two years, that there would be light at the end of the tunnel. I made it through the programs, but still have no license. After leaving my house because I could not drive, and not being able to get my license back my life has just become an empty shell. I am reminded every day when I take the buss that I should be grateful that it was not worse, but it doesn't seem to matter, life happens, and sometimes you get the short straw and you have to live with it. I just hope that my statistic makes some small difference in the future when some law gets past that we should not punish people for being human.

After 4 months of absolute hell be unemployed, I finally got a job. It pays much less than my previous job plus I will have to relocate, but at least it's a job. If I can stay on this job for at least 2 years then my DUI will be 5 years old which makes it easier to swallow for employers. That's if I don't get pulled over for another one. During the last 4 months I began drinking again almost daily, I'm planning to quit after I start this job though.

I feel for you all too. But do not lose hope. I received a dui back in July of 2001. It was my first. I had to serve 4 days in jail and three years unsupervised probation until October of 2004. We'll my background investigation wasn't complete until January 2005 and I was able to keep my job. I was a federal contractor for the Dept. Of Homeland Security for over 9 years and was recently let go June of this year because of sequestration. Fast forward to October 12. I was working in a small contrat job and went to work that morning, came back home and cooked for my wife and daughter and had no sleep at all. I decided later on to go with some friends to watch the Redskin/Cowboys game and had some drinks. On my way home I passed my exit and took the next one to turn around. I came up to a stop light and put my car in park while the light was red so I could grab some pizza that was in the back seat. As I was waiting for the light to turn I fell asleep. Next thing I know the police is standing outside my car. So I got out and they asked me how much I had to drink and I told them a little bit but I was mostly tired as the reason I fell asleep. There were three officers two men and a woman. The female officer asked me to do a field test to see if I can drive home ( I think she had already predetermine that she was going to lock me up). The male officers had asked me if I could drive before she wanted to do the test ( eye, walk strait line, and hold one foot in the air for 10 seconds). So me thinking if I do this and pass she would let me go. My problem with this is how many people can do this test right after waking up even if sober? To my surprise I did it with flying colors , no staggering or nothing and soon as I was finished she just put the cuffs on me. I don't even remember anyone reading me my rights. They took me to the station and gave me some paper to sign if I agree or deny the blood alcohol level test. I denied it. And she let me go home. But I really felt that that she pushed the issue to lock me up. Now this is my second dui in the same state (MD) and it has been on my mind ever since. There is not one day that I don't think about that night. I too am searching for another job because I am on unemployment and the contract job I am doing now pays cash but very little plus I have to work 7 days a week to receive the whole check. Am I worried? Yes but I am not giving up hope. My hearing is in December and the trial is February. My lawyer is telling me that I have a good chance of beating the charge but I still worry if landing another job with the industry the way it is. I also think that the laws for dui offenders are too harsh. Almost every job that I apply for asks if my license ever been suspended or if I was convicted of a dui whether for driving jobs or not. And believe it or not some of us dui offenders are some of the best working people in this country but yet it seems that we labeled as killers or sex offenders or something. As far as employment though, the harsh reality is that we may have to start our own business for something that we are really good at just to generate some type of income or to make it today. Since then, I have not drinked anything and told my wife I will never take a drink again even if I am home. It will be hard for us people but do not give up hope and please don't kill yourself it's not worth it. Just trust in GOD!

Sorry that you too have to experience this, and I wish you luck , but just by being strong and not letting it get you down is a plus.

hire an attorney! it might cost you some, but not as much as going on your own!

I go to court tomorrow for a DUI and it doesn't look good. Looking at jail time, year suspension, fines, interlock system and who knows what else. Never been in trouble, no points. Job that I have spent the last 10 years building to is in jeopardy as I need to drive a government vehicle. If I lose my job I really have no chance to get another in the same field with this on my record. Basically I'll be starting from scratch as a 28 year old with useless job experience and probably have to move back to my moms house, which is horrifying. I basically turned what was a bright future into a no future.

Sorry that you too fell into the DUI triangle, but I do not think that you will do any jail time, but the rest of your story is up for grabs, it can and will destroy a career , and it can wreck a future, but as long as there is a tomorrow, you have a chance to change things

i am tried of suffering for my dui too We need to form an organization to help
help those with dui's not be sentenced for live.

many in madd have had dui's.

I am in for a organization the fight back, but we need a lot of people because madd, or government , law and NHTSA, or all very powerful, is bigger then you and I, and most people who all you a drank, will be getting a dui when it go's down to .05, and then .02. If one women put together this powerful organization, then we can do it.

I have a friend of mine who is a trucker and lives in CT. Somebody used his drivers license number to do a job in GA then they abandoned the truck in GA after being pulled over for DUI. My poor friend cannot find a job now until he clears his name. The driver of that truck supposedly lives in Detroit.

"Because even with rehab, AA and clean and sober house living, we are still unable to work ANYWHERE
That's all I have to say on that matter"

This is the bottom line. When you fill out an application they tell you to be truthful and honest but when you are, your application in most cases goes directly to the round file, no matter how well you did on the interview. They never even bother to contact you again. This has happened to me on several occasions.

If you apply for a position where driving is necessary this is understandable, but many companies have legal clauses in their books where hiring a person with a DUI can cause their group Health and/or Life insurance policies to go up if they hire somebody with a DUI.

Not only that, if your manager(s) knows that you had a DUI conviction but they decide to hire you anyway, they might and will blame alcohol for every mistake you ever make, every outburst you ever made, every day off you take, as well as any problem whatsoever. This can become very disheartening in itself ! To them, it's almost like having a crack-addict in the house and something goes missing.

Now I know why criminals decide to leave the country once finishing their incarceration period, or they will never live in peace.

so true, but insurance companies are big business and they buy politicians , these same people that we elect to office are the same people that turn there backs on the same people that put them there, DUI offenders suffer because we are not a unit, though there are many of us, we stand alone, if we can get everyone that is against the way DUI are handle, we can make a change, and someday there will be someone that will take the rein and change the way people see us

yes its time we stand up and get our live sentence expunged. i paid my dues completed sentence requirements. ( supervision for 3 yrs(. that is longer than some murders get!

We need to fight back, and show people that madd will destroy everyone live, because they are getting brainwashed.

my dui was a case of over zealous cops and poorly handled. i did not have good counsel either.
i was guilty with out proof! my case was not totally
investigated. now i have a life sentence.

you are an alcoholic if get a dui.
alcoholism is considered a disease, so my have a life sentence because i have a disease?
would a cancer patient be punished like this?
just food for though!

This organization seems to be the only one that I know of that fights for Drivers rights: NMA( National Motorist Association) http://www.motorists.org/

However, if they were not able to stop MADD(mothers against Drunk Driving http://www.madd.org/ which is very powerful then we are in a lot of trouble.

When I attended ASAP(Alcohol Safety Action Program ) classes after I got busted 3 years ago, all they did is show us films of people who were injured in alcohol related accidents. What they failed to tell us is that NHTSA(National Highway Traffic Safety Administration) defines fatal collisions as "alcohol-related" if they believe the driver, a passenger, or non-motorist (such as a pedestrian or pedal cyclist) had a BAC of 0.01% or greater.

Our own bodies produce alcohol, so even if you did not have a drink in several days, there might still be traces of alcohol in your body. This all rigged up by the government so that alcohol is blamed for 47% of all traffic deaths although the real reason is speeding, in attention, talking on cell phones, faulty equipment , drowsiness, road-rage and driver error.

While I was attending the ASAP classes, I saw some of the most gruesome films describing how people were injured or maimed by drunk drivers. Those films left me feeling guilty and contrite for sure, but what about the people who are maimed or killed in accidents for reasons other than alcohol. ASAP did not include those films clips and I'm pretty sure if they did, they would have been just as horrific as the alcohol related ones.

I'm not saying that you should go out and drink and drive, but what I'm saying is, if you did not cause any accident(s) then why should you be punished for life ?

People know that smoking causes cancer yet they smoke anyway ? Bar tenders know that most of their clientele will hop in their car no matter how many drinks they have. This is an American tradition...

Indeed Alky, in most states it is worse to have a DUI than to have a violent offense or a felony on your record. I found this out the hard way when applying for work with a few local oil refineries here in Northern California. They are international shipping ports which requires a TWIC card (Transportation Workers Identification Credentials) from TSA (Transportation Security Administration). A DUI offender can get a TWIC, but in most cases cannot be hired by one of these companies though they do employ many ex felons.

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You are not a criminal. In most court cases where a crime was involved the prosecutors and the jury are very interested in finding out the MOTIVE for this crime. Why did this person rob this bank, why did this person kill their spouse, why did this person black mail their boss etc. The motive is usually the determining factor of whether a crime was committed or not. However when it comes to drunk driving, in the majority of cases, the convicted person was usually not aware of their BAC level and usually the motive was not to harm property or other individuals. I don't know why so many states consider a DUI a crime when no persons or property were injured. That is what insurance is for...

true, but the federal government decided to make it a crime, this is why first time offenders can still receive prison time, a DUI offense carries as much weight as any other crime, it stay on your record, it can prevent you from getting employment , it can keep you out of other countries and it can make people see you as a problem, no we are not criminals to other DUI offenders but to the rest of the world treat and see us that way. So until there is a change, we will suffer and more like us will suffer

That is a really good point , that is why we have insurance.

I am ready , for it's a crime that citizens are forced to lose everything that they own because of an infraction, the DUI laws has made some run from the law and others a nervous wreak . I am willing to do what ever it take to change the lawless DUI rules

So am I. You notice that MADD is run by women. Whenever I walk into a 711 store to buy beer, the women at the counter cringe as if I was buying Heroin. This is akin to the prohibition days where women heavily influenced that campaign. More people die in traffic accidents from inattention, speeding and talking on the cell phones than with alcohol. Women are the main culprits when it comes to texting, talking on their cell phones and driving.

New Jersey and I think Wisconsin are the only 2 states that consider a DUI a traffic infraction instead of a criminal misdemeanor. You still have to pay your dues, but an infraction does not go against your criminal record. Meaning that you can apply to any job even a government job without worrying about your criminal record. You can have 2 or 3 DUIs in NJ and it is still not considered a crime. However in NJ the DUI does stays on you record for life, it does not drop off ever. Their reasoning is that how are they going to determine what to tack on for a 2nd, 3rd, or 4th DUI if the first one was expunged or dropped.

I'm not sure what happens when they do a criminal background check on you in NJ and you happen to have a DUI from another state on your record. Do they consider that DUI an infraction instead of a criminal misdemeanor ? If that is the case then I might as well move to NJ.

I always wondered why I kept seeing NJ license plates on cars wherever I traveled NJ-sians don't want to lose their driving privileges.

well I am sure when this was posed, but it is a crime in nj

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I agree Daedae. There are many cases where drivers, passengers and by-standers have died because someone ran from the police to avoid a DUI. Some instances may have been first offenses, others may have been a second, and some may have been a second by default (due to zero tolerance policies which in most states, which prohibit a DUI offender from getting behind the wheel with any measurable amount of alcohol in their blood.) I have heard of people behaving good, and then under uncontrollable circumstances had to get behind the wheel. Or they were coerced into it

contract me, and maybe we can get other people to fine away back, from this hell that madd is causeing

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Screw this. I'm seeing my situation repeated over and over. Caveat: I have a shoulder injury that for all intents and purposes renders me disabled. So bad that I'm on long-term opioid pain meds. So, construction jobs and the like that don't background check are out for me. Back to, SCREW THIS: we're all in the same situation, we're all clear thinking adults, we're all being victimised by unjust laws... It's time to band together! I messaged Ex Civilians on FB offering to join them; to turn this into a CAUSE, not a support group. These laws need changing, we're the ones with the most to gain by said change, so let's become the counter- lobby to MADD! You've set it up with Ex Civilians, so let me in, let's do some research, and figure out how to CHANGE THESE AWFUL LAWS! Everyone else posting: you join too! Let's not sit down and take this quietly! Let's join together! Let's FIGHT!

If you have sent a friend request then I have approved it. And yes we are a cause. This is all of our cause. Feel free to post your stories, related articles etc on our wall. OUR wall, not my wall. OURS.

I would like to join, if one women started this witch hunt, then we and all get together. Because it is not just you and me, it will soon be all the people who will look at you as a drunk, because the bac will go to .05 to .02.

Got my first DUI a couple months ago, so i hired an attorney. he really didn't help. I blew to the slightest degree so got the minimum of everything! The fines are so much I just want to serve the time in jail! Does anybody know if I can do this now? I've already seen the judge and he has already ordered me to fines and one day in jail. Can I just not pay the fines and do the whole time in jail? How do I go about this??

As far as I know, yes you can do time in jail without having to pay the fines. I knew somebody in my court ordered 4 month rehab class I had to take after I got busted, who did just that. However you should probably speak to your probation officer (if you have one) about the consequences. Also, if you still have a job, the court allows you to set up payment plans. As far as your lawyer doing nothing, most of them can't do a dam thing. If the law says 'mandatory' then nothing can really be done if you are found guilty. The lawyer can try to dispute the results of your blood test, urine test or breath test, or maybe even your Miranda rights , but that is a long shot and the judge is not going to waste time with that, since they heard it all before. Remember it's the police officers word against yours and the judge is infinitely more likely to be swayed by the police officer's word than yours. Sorry ...

I have never heard of a case where you could sway fines for jail. The court is not concerned with your interests

Yeah I'm doing 13 days to cover all fines which totaled about $2,200.

Here it is. The first organization for the reintegration of DUI offenders and political reform is up and running. Add us as a friend.
https://www.facebook.com/ex.civilians.1?hc_location=timeline

please click the link, read our opening post and friend us. WE are up and running for 1 hour how

I don't want to have anything to do with Facebook. Thanks

This is a wonderful thread for DUI support. I got arrested on May 19 In Florida for going 62 in a 45 mile construction zone, didn't see the signs posted. I got pulled over and blew .150 on my breath test. Was arrested, had the car impounded, and my wife bailed me out the next day for $500.I have never had any problems with the law and am 58. I spent the night in jail and never was so embarrassed in my life.The next day, I hired a lawyer for $6000, and am wondering if I have wasted my money. I did get an extension on my license for a month, and the lawyers are filing all documents and waivering my court appearances. However, will I get a lesser charge? Anybody with experience with lawyers, and have I paid too much in Florida?

You probably wasted your money: Listen to my story

Your story reminds me of my story except I think mine is a lot

worse. I received my DUI back in 2010 but the repercussions of that

fatal night are still affecting me to this day. I had just received

an offer letter from a government agency contingent on whether I

passed a background investigation. I felt confident because I

already had a job although a temporary one, so whether I passed the

'BI' or not it was no big deal at the time.

Boy was I wrong ! When I received the offer letter, I decided to

clean up my apartment that had been a mess ever since I was laid-

off from my permanent job where I worked for 5 long tedious years.

So I decided to wax the floors. Nothing like a job offer to get you

motivated to clean up your act ! While waxing the floors I slowly

sipped on a bottle of Chardonnay. When the Chardonnay was out, I

went out and purchased one of those High-alcohol beers in a 16OZ

can. I did not eat all day while I was drinking and this would come

back to haunt me. Mind you, having been a drinker all my life my

tolerance level was through the roof.

In any case, I called my mother that night and she detected that I

was drunk. We got into a heated argument and I winded hanging up on

her. Already the liquor had affected my judgment. I should have

been happy but instead I became highly confrontational. My mother

did not help either with her constant nagging and put-downs.

After that phone call, I became very agitated and decided to get

another "quick one" to help me get some sleep since I had run out

sort of speak.

It was about 10:45PM ( Sunday memorial day weekend) and I knew that

the "sin shop' would close at 11:00, so I got in my car and

rushed towards the store before they closed. Unfortunately, before

I realized it I was going 15 miles over the speed limit. Through

the corner of my eye I saw a police car with the lights off

standing on the corner. I slammed on the brakes to slow the car

down but it was too late. The police car turned on his lights

followed me for about 2 blocks then threw on the blue flashing

lights and blew the siren.

Right then, I knew I was done and my life would be altered forever.

The first thing he asked me was if I knew why he stopped me ? I

said "NO not really". He said I was going 12 miles above the speed

limit ! I shrugged hoping he would only give me a ticket for

speeding. Then he asked me "have you been drinking tonight ?" Like

a dope I said YES I had a couple of beers or something like that.

He told me to step out of the car gave me the alphabet soup test,

the finger on the nose test, the walk a straight line test and

finally breath analyzer test. I blew a .19 BAC.

To make it worse some people began forming around. They did not

seem very upset either it was more like entertainment to them. The

police officer told me to sit down on the side walk while hand

cuffed, until the tow truck arrived to haul my car. This took

about 10 minutes or less I don't remember. I never felt like such

a criminal but things would get worse. I watched as my beloved car

one of the few things I own, was being hoisted on the tow truck .

Then the police officer told me to get in the back of his car. It

was rough ride to the police station. I just could not believe it.


I thought I was having a bad dream and sooner or later I would

wake up, but that never happened. When I got to the precinct , 3

or 4 police officers began heckling me. You caught a fat one ! some

said 1 year minimum sentence plus a $2500 fine while laughing. One

of the officers recognized me from a previous reckless driving

incident I had received 3 years ago. He said "we knew you would be

back ha ha-ha". This went on and on...

I became very upset due the humiliation I was receiving and wanted

to run, or strike back, but the more I resisted the more

ammunition I gave them(cops). I was asked to blow into another

breath analyzer machine. I tried to fool the machine as best as I

could, but this time I blew a .21 two points higher than I had

blown in the field and almost 3 times above the limit. The

arresting officer looked at me and sadly said man you need help.

I was placed in a holding-area not really a holding cell, but

more like a lobby with hard chairs with no cushions surrounded by

about 15 other prisoners.

The police officers doing our paper work sat right in front of us

in comfortable desk and seats grinning and seemingly appearing to

be having a good time totally unaware of our misery. I have never

seen so much cooperation between coworkers as I have witnessed at

this police station. There seemed to be zero animosity between

coworkers whether male/female/black/white/Hispanic/Asian whatever,

they all seemed to work in total harmony and towards one common

goal, to uphold the law.

I'm pretty sure if the law stated that drunk drivers should be

exterminated immediately, they would perform those duties with no

questions asked, that is how disciplined they were...


Because of my high BAC reading, I would not be released for

another 48 hours. This meant that I would not be able to go to

work that next Tuesday at my temporary job. When Tuesday morning

came around I knew that I would have to call my job and tell them

that I could not come in, but I did not want to use the phones at

the police station because the phone number would probably show up

on the caller ID at my job !

Lucky for me, one of the police officers there let me use his

personal cell phone, so I could call in sick. Tuesday was also

supposed to be the day that I got my finger prints taken for the

government job which had been offered (contingent on passing the

BI) !

From there things just went from bad to worse. Due to the court

dates, I had to take days off from my temporary job with no viable

explanations. I only told them that I had some legal problems that

needed to be take cared of.

My BI investigation began soon in earnest and a private

investigator from OPM would visit my job to ask me questions about

my DUI and my drinking habits. He seemed especially concerned

about my drinking habits.

Around 2 months later my case finally came up in the courts. It

took 2 months of a harrowing night mare I just could not believe !

My Lawyer who somehow appeared out of nowhere during the

preliminary hearings a month earlier, had promised he would

represent me and would try to fight the charges as hard and as best

he could. This would cost me $2500 which I had to take out of my

401K savings because I did not have any other funds.

When my case came up this same lawyer would tell me that we really

did not have a case because of my high BAC readings and because

the case in front of mine was for vehicular-manslaughter which

would sway the judge.

The only thing my lawyer was able to do was to plea bargain my BAC

reading from .21 to .15 which meant that I would only be

incarcerated for 5 days instead of 10 days which is mandatory in VA

for people who were convicted with a BAC .15 and over. The only

thing I could do now was to plead guilty.

Due to the fact that I already spent 48 hours in the holding cell,

I was given 3 days in the county jail. I had to voluntarily report

to that jail or a warrant would be sent out against me. I chose

Friday, Saturday and Sunday this way I would not miss too many

hours of work. For the first time in my life I was incarcerated

in a government institution just like any other criminal. It was a

humbling experience to say the least.


The only thing you could really do in jail is read, eat and go to

sleep. Each hour felt like a life time. To make matters worse, the

guards there looked down on you to the point where you had no

dignity at all despite your past accomplishments. Not only that

all your belongings including human belongings were under constant

threat of evaporating while you sat in that jail cell. This was one

of the most sobering experiences I have ever imagined which lead to

feelings of guilt and irresponsibility.

When I got out that Tuesday morning I felt so relieved. I still

had my apartment and all that was contained within it. I still had

my family even though I did not tell them exactly what happened and

I still had my temporary job.

However later on my drivers license would be revoked, making it

hard for me to get to work. My temporary job would pass on me as a

viable candidate. The government job which was offered would be

rescinded. And I would be thrown into a hostile job market with

multiple strikes against me(age, race, criminal conviction).

The story is not yet over, but maybe it is over for me as far as my

career is concerned. I'll keep you posted

Hi Daedae,
I wish I could say things have turned around and are looking better for me but I can't. But I will reiterate a thought we have shared. That YES, there needs to be a group to lobby for the rights, recovery and rehabilitation of DUI offenders. But first there needs to be a term coined for us. Without a term we are just DUI offenders, and any likely response to our condition will be swept aside with the same old "yeah, so what. They got a DUI and now they have to pay for it."

Until we coin a term for people like us (we can call ourselves Xcivilians for now)

People whos -lives have been destroyed because they have a DUI on their record,
-Who have been made unable to work, or be employed because of workplace insurance stipulations and background checks
-Who face arrest if they don't continue to pay fines for which they have no income to pay for,
-Who have been left completely unable to support and provide for themselves and their families
-Who can no longer even commit their lives to the military in wartime as a last effort, because of DUI inflicted probation and criminal background,
-People unable to be employed as a taxi; delivery driver; fireman; paramedic; commercial truck driver; postal worker; mechanic; construction laborer or equipment operator; Bus driver; UPS driver; culligan water guy; HVAC technician; sprinkler fitter; mechanic; pizza delivery guy; mobile security officer; sheriff or highway patrol; anything to do with parks and recreation maintenance; any state or government agency period, etc etc etc, the list goes on and on.
-People who face depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts because their entire livelihood and ability to prosper has been destroyed, and there truly is no hope in their future.

(like I said, lets just call ourselves Xcivilians for this example)

We are clearly something more than just DUI offenders.

When govt officials, or whomever, hears the term DUI offenders, they say "yeah, so... they need to do their time and pay their fines"

Thats all they think of. Because DUI offenders are at a glance just DUI offenders.

Nothing in the title of "DUI Offenders" addresses how regulation has destroyed their lives and any chance of recovering and being able to be a contributing member of society again.
It only addresses that they are criminals

WE NEED to invent a new term for ourselves which addresses us as people whos DUI criminal history and insurance regulation has ruined everything in our lives, until then it will be very hard to organize any kind of lobbying movement on our behalf. Because like I said, we will just be DUI offenders at a glance and will only receive the same "pay your fines and get a new job" advice

Then others can unite nationwide in support of (Xcivilians) again just a temporary term for this example.

Because people just can't unite in support of DUI offenders, they won't.

The notion of REHABILITATING DUI offenders just receives the same non productive solutions, alcohol rehab, jail time, take their license away, stick em in a clean and sober house, make them go to AA, etc

These are not the main issues we face.

We are not all alcoholics needing rehab.

We are more than that, and we need to appoint a term for our condition that addresses us as real people, formerly productive members of society, people who have done their time and payed their dues, but yet will forever be crucified on paper.

Because even with rehab, AA and clean and sober house living, we are still unable to work ANYWHERE
That's all I have to say on that matter


I would also like to add that I have applied with local agencies and school districts to be a DUI/alcohol abuse educator.
When I was in school, we had DARE but it was very ineffective. They didn't tell us much except that drugs and alcohol are bad and nobody will like you if you do them....

If they would introduce a DUI offender (or an Xcivilian) to students, someone to tell them how a DUI has truly ruined their life in all these ways... well guess what, people would really not want to drink.

But guess what else, I am ineligible for employment with any CA school districts because of my DUI criminal history. So I cannot share my story in schools to help educate students on the real ramifications of drinking. Hmmmm. Real good system they have there....

I am done now. I hope things are looking up for you DaeDae. In creating this forum discussion, you really have helped so many of us in more ways than any of us can express. It really helps to know that we are not all truly alone in this. Take care my friend.
-Rob

Hi Rob,, after reading your comment, sadness sank in , because i know that what you wrote is not only the truth but it's what I'm experiencing now. I agree that we need a name that describe us other than DUI offenders, we need to become as one, daily the DUI laws add a new member of this unorganize membership, so yes we have enough members to have a voice, but we must band together before anything can be done. I will end this with thank you for the kind words and for sharing your thoughts

I would be very interest to form a group, and try to be our freedom back.

Well I am for anything that is against this joke of a crime

Also Rob, I can not take credit for starting this forum, I am just like you and the others here voicing my opinion and feeling. Take care my friend

"That YES, there needs to be a group to lobby for the rights, recovery and rehabilitation of DUI offenders. "

I agree the noose has certainly got tighter around DUI offenders. First of all most government jobs require some type of clearance. Before you can even step foot inside a government agency you need an interim clearance. Then a few weeks later the actual security investigation begins, but once you put down you had a DUI conviction it raises red flags and your interim clearance is denied. This means you are unemployed while you go through a security investigation which may last months and may not be favorable in the end. Do you think an agency is going to keep that slot open until you get your clearance ? I should know this happened to me back in 2010. I spent 8 months waiting for the investigator to call me and tell me I had passed my Back Ground investigation which never happened. In the end they denied my clearance for Alcohol Abuse. The investigators are not on your side and are looking for excuses to deny your clearance so something like a recent DUI makes it it real easy for them. Not only government jobs but most private companies ask if you ever were convicted of a misdemeanor. If you answered "yes" it's all over but the tears. Some companies are more lenient, but wont consider any DUI on your record less than 5 years old. They say they found a more qualified candidate or most commonly wont reply to you at all and let you to figure it out. I once was hired at this company and worked with them for 2 months until I had to fill out a BI, 3 days later they escorted me out the door like a criminal. I was turned down for countless jobs, or I pulled out once I found out about the companies policies regarding misdemeanors. This was not always the case. 10 years ago a misdemeanor such as a DUI meant nothing, but these days you are an outright criminal that cannot be rehabilitated. I know ex-cons with felonies that fared better than people with a DUI, maybe because they have recommendations on where to apply. A DUI convict does not have such luxuries so it's like playing Russian roulette. This can go on for years and years until you reach retirement age, you move out of the country or you croak I bed. Sorry that's the way I see it and what I've experienced. Forget about trying to hire a DUI lawyer. They are part of the network that preys and exploits drunk drivers to fatten their pockets. In my state if you blow over .08, the chances that you will be found guilty are 98%. So why hire a lawyer ? Well he might be able to plead down you .20BAC to .15BAC that way you only spend 5 days in jail instead of 10. or he might be able to plead down your fine from $1500 to $500, but that's about it, the chances that he can plead down your DUI to something less are almost nil, unless you are extremely lucky or just happened to blow just a little above .08. Anything over .09 and you are through almost guaranteed to be convicted. So if you blew less than .15 and this is your first offense, save the $2500 because a lawyer can't do anything for you believe me but they wont tell you that. Some judges know these lawyers personally(by name) and know their game. They don't want to be made look like a fool too often no matter how much cash you put out. Next time you see that lawyer with a brand new pair of shoes and a brand new suit you know where your money went. Another thing these lawyers claim is expungement. Well in most states as far as I know you cannot expunge a DUI unless you pleaded not guilty. You might be better off with a pardon, but then gain you must have pleaded not guilty.

I found out that if you play by the rules you only get burned. You put down DUI on any job application and your application in most cases than not winds up in the round file. You tell a background investigator about your past misdeeds trying to be honest, or you are scared he might find out and I guarantee you they will use every single misdeed against you. Even the little ones. These guys are not on your side once you have been convicted of a DUI. They are there to lower the boom on you and make you feel more guilty if not more suicidal. Believe me they could care less.

It's best you give a BI investigator the least amount of information. If they ask you have you ever smoked Marihuana say "hell no" and quickly move to next question. Say the least amount possible and after the interview write down all your answers in case they come back and asks you the same question again to dig out any discrepancies. Best to answer Yes , NO, maybe... to everything, but certainly don't get into details or give names addresses or phone numbers.

Another thing if you are going to drive drunk which happens to the best of us, for Christ sakes do not speed, do not weave in an out of traffic, make sure your plates are valid, make sure you have your seatbelt on and your lights on. The reason most people get stopped for DUI is not because they were driving like maniacs but that they did something to attract the eyes of the local cop hiding behind that tree. You can drive drunk all day long as long as you do not do something stupid like getting on the highway and driving in speeds excess of the speed limit. This is why people get stopped in the first place.

https://www.facebook.com/ex.civilians.1?hc_location=timeline

Here it is. The first organization of DUI offenders. X Civilians. Please add as friend

The problem I see here is that it is not only in the US. many countries have adopted the same laws and the same penalties for DUI offenders. In some countries like Canada they are even more strict. My hope is that the cops catch so many DUI offenders that after a while it becomes the norm and a DUI is not a big issue anymore...

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I live in Australia and have just been charged with driving under the influence for the 3rd time. I blew .196 and have a big chance of jail time. I was first done in 2000 and blew .10 which I was lucky to be able to get a work licence in the day time and got a $600.00 fine. The law has now changed though and you are not able to get a work licence for anything over .10 now. I then was completely stupid do get done in 2005 in which I blew .149. I received 1 year suspended licence and $1000.00 fine. I have now managed to get caught again. The stupid thing is that since being done in 2005 I have not once driven drunk apart from 2 weeks ago and low and behold I get caught. I did not crash or hurt anyone and although my reading is high I have a high tolerance for alcohol as I had been verging on alcoholism. I had been to rehab in February for 3 weeks and had given up drinking and smoking cigarettes. I had not had a drink at all till that night. Why I drove I still do not understand? I knew not to from the embarrassment and shame last time so why the hell did I do it. My life has been a living nightmare for the last 2 weeks. I feel the same as so many others that have written here. I can't sleep, I hate myself so much and have had suicidal thoughts, I have ceased contact with everybody and have basically become a total recluse. I have two young girls who keep asking me why I cant drive them to friends or dancing etc and I feel like a total low life. I'am looking at possible jail time, possible suspended sentence, huge fine, and loss of licence for 2+ years. I don't think I would ever have respect for myself again if I go to jail. I feel like I have killed someone and feel unfairly sentenced in the case of "you could of injured or killed someone". I in all 3 times of being charged had not had anyone else in the car, had not crashed the car and had not injured myself or anybody or thing. Do they charge other people for other offences with "what if you raped her" "what if you stole that car". What if is not doing but I'm apparently guilty as charged anyway. They have now bought in the vehicle interlock which is to be used in your vehicle for 1 year after you get your licence back. Im fine with this....I would be more than happy to drive with it for the rest of my life. I clearly can't drink drive so why don't they use this punishment instead of taking peoples chance to keep working and looking after their family away. Speeding kills more people on our roads than drunk driving but the penilties are not even close to the same and the what ifs don't seem to apply. Has anyone in America thought about moving to another country to seek work?

Let the President know about the outrageous alcohol interlock device situation.<br />
petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/alcohol-interlock-device/RpPlldxw

I hate to bust your bubble but if this device was in every auto, this would help people from not getting a DUI, there was a senator that suggested this in the year 2010, at first I thought that he was a joke, but now I know that if one was in my auto at that time I would have never have gotten a DUI, but again the government can not make any money off of it if it is mandatory to have them in every auto, so they ignored the senator idea of mandatory installation of interlock

You did not bust my bubble by any means. The devices dont work correctly in new cars which causes major violations which cause you to loose your driving privileges. If the device is mandatory it should work in all cars not just some. And the companies should probably test them on new cars before they install them. Feel free to sign the petition.

The sadness you feel is a sign of a person with depth and sensitivity. That's what defines you. The DUI does not define you. It's just something that happened in your life just like the trials and tribulations everyone has. But there's more to you than that and there's more you can offer yourself.

Thank you, kind words are also like medicine, they can help heal

I just got a DUI 2 mornings ago. I am a recovering alcoholic that has been doing so great, haven't drank for a year and 4 months. And I throw it all away moving up to this crap city. I moved up here for a guy, he waits for me to get up here to introduce me to his girl/f. Then I have a chance to become a Deputy for a sheriffs dept. I did an interview with them Thursday they said they would call friday if I got the job...and I think everything just overwhelmed me so friday night I started drinking. Not one of my best ideas ever. But I highly doubt I deserve a black eye and a bruised stomach from police abuse. But good luck to everyone!

I've gotta chime in here. I am a mother of a 17 year old son. My son got caught up in making stupid choices daily from age 14-16. At age 16 he was expelled from high school for pot. that was a turning point in this child's life. He almost instantly got on the right track, he got a job, started meditating, eating super healthy. He was home almost every night and home early, so I was finally able to sleep at night, it was also nice not crying myself to sleep with worry over him. 1 week ago, my husband and I headed to bed around 10pm, I stopped by my son's room to say goodnight and get a hug. There he was eating his weird healthy food ( I prefer french fries myself ;)) looking at photos of the ocean. He has big dreams of traveling. At 1:15am my phone rang, I ignored it thinking it was the wrong number. But then I heard my husband jump up and grab his phone. I heard him talking and knew something bad had happened, just didn't know who it was happening too. I rolled out of bed, walked down the hall passing my son's room knowing he was sleeping in his bed, when I saw my husband he had a very bad look on his face. I asked him what happened. He said: 'He's okay, but he got a DUI and totaled his car, it was upside down on ----- Way.' I said 'WHO?!' The next word that came out of his mouth was my son's name. I couldn't believe it! I ran to his room, flung his door open and stared at his empty bed. How could he have done this??!! He's been doing so good lately! Where was he? Was he in the hospital, jail... was anyone else involved... is anyone dead? Oh my god, is HE dead? Did they just say he's okay so I don't panic? So many things went through my head. He was fortunate, nobody else was involved and he walked away with a few scratches and a bruised face. This should not have happened! I've told him for years if he ever needed a ride, or his friends... he could call me anytime no questions asked. But he didn't, he thought he was okay to drive and if I hadn't smelled the alcohol on him, I never would have guessed he had been drinking, he surely didn't seem drunk. I know he has a tough road ahead of him and he is ready to face it head on. He is a good kid, he really is, just got a little off track. Drunk driving has always scared the crap out of me, I'm still trying to wrap my head around how my child could have done it after everything I've said, everything I thought I've taught him. I could have lost my son that night. He would have died alone in the cold dark night, not even another car passing by, as a mother that's what is breaking my heart. Nothing else in the universe is more important than what was almost lost that night. I hope everyone who faces these situations come out a better person, we're on this earth for a reason. Each of us has a purpose, maybe it's a very loud purpose that's meant for the whole world, but maybe it's a little more subtle, maybe it's just a whisper meant for our own selves. Just remember we all have something to give in this world.

I am glad that your son is alright and that no one else got hurt, and I wish him well as now he must face the court system, but do not beat yourself up over the fact that he tried to drive home after drinking, alcohol clouds the judgement. Let your son know that it could have been a lot worst and that he has another chance at living life without driving while under the influence . May God bless you and may your good fortune continual, it was a blessing that your son did not kill someone or himself that night, good luck

Hi there. I read your sorry and I agree with alot you mean. I don't even care about not having a car or a license or high insurance. I'm so glad I did not more seriously injur someone or worse. I was unlucky and my Gf in the car with me was drinking too so we both ended up with broken legs and I have a bodily harm charge. Which is much better then causing death charge. Very very thankful and it certainly won't happen again. I got very very lucky. Feel free to read my story. I see you around alot. And see it's been years since your DUI. Are you getting close to getting it expunged? Please let me know how your doing today. Did a new job come along. What have you done to adapt? I totally hear u on the government. There is no tool for reform. It has changed the way I see government and society and it's a terrible feeling. I'm only 22 now was 21 at the time. For me to be tht young and unexperienced it's been very tough. But I also feel very blessed to be able to live at home and hve a support system. Look forward to hearing from you.

Hi Sjam, I am sorry about the broken legs, but it could have been much worst, it's great that you have family that understands that anyone can make a mistake, I too have family and friends that understood, but for the one's that did not is where my pain came from, and the embarrassment of it all can be just as bad as a slap in the face, but as I said we all make mistakes it's what you learn from it that matters, as the old saying goes, "Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it" Anyway as far as a job, the answer is not yet, I have about another 11 months to go before I can go out and start searching for work in my field. And as far as expungement goes, not in the state of NY at least not for a CDL license. I have like many others on this site have come to cherish the freedom that I have , I also know that I do not want to cause anyone harm so the time that I could spend drinking to get drunk, I now use it doing something else while staying sober and feel better about it, you are young, you will bounce back from this, just remember it could have been worst, you have a second chance, don't blow it

Well flob it does suckk about the penalties enforced on drinking and driving, but just thank god you didn't hit anyone and ruin there life.At 46 years old my life change dramaticly because of a drunk driver. I was a successful commercial diver and after I was hit my neck was broke and was bed ridden for 7 months before they would operateN after that I coulndnt dive anymore nor could I finish my military obligation so 18 years in no pension and let me add the drunk driver had no insurance.So please be thankful that it wasn't worst and don't let your friends drive after drinking...p.s.my good friend s mom and father were goimg home from dinner jan 7th or so and was hit by a drunk driver dad died mom in acomma and the drunk driver is prettty much ok a few bumps and bruises ..so I guess are lives have pretty much turned upsidedown just because of someone not saying no to driving.good luck to you pay the fines and move on its a small price to pay.

you know fella..I really feel for you. I had a dui in 1973 and onther in 1993..40 ad 20 years ago. Last month I was driving to the store at 7:30 in the morning and being that I just recently had a neck surgery and 5 lower back disc fused as well . I rear ended a car, got knocked out and admitted to the officr I had taken my meds the night before.. now guess what.. I got a dui.. I amactually one that takes keys from people if they seemimpaired.. but here I am looking at a serious situation. I am s scared right now and pray that the court will understand I took the meds forpain and not to get high. In fct if you hav ain..you won'tget high.. It goes straight to the issue. anyways.. I feelforyour situation as I can relate.. and onyone whoreads this.. please remember me daedae in your prayers.

Hello fr8logix, I can understand your feeling scared, that's what a DUI will do someone that cares, as far as the DUI of 40 years ago, I wouldn't worry about that to much, no computers and more than likely the paperwork was tossed a long time ago, same as with the DUI of 20 years ago but with the latest DUI if the meds said do not operate heavy equipment or driving , ( check the bottle ) then you just have to wish that they understand. I hope that they let you off with a fine and a warning, yours is just another example of the reason why they should look into and change the DUI laws, I wish you the best my friend

Can buying your own truck be done with a dui? I really hate this club but. I know I am welcome for sure. I was wondering how far can my attorney go with the case.....cause beating it don't seem likely; By reading a lot of message boards and the dui laws of Pa., everything is pretty much at a lost so I am gearing up for the time ahead. I try now not to think about it as much at least clear my head. But with the bills that are coming it is going to be hard road to drive. Either starting up a low costing franchise so, I can at least have some income coming in. Because it get more complicated if I decide to move and rent out my home and sell the car. Wow so everything I worked for will be taking away. I really believe they want more after all that, there goes losing things in 3's.

<p>DUI on November 13th. I am 39 years old, going through the up hill battle of a dui case within this great state of Pa. (sarcastically speaking). I felt the reality of driving while intoxicated the moment the lights flashed on me through my rear view. No damage to myself, anyone else or property. Driving below the speed limit of 40. I still felt as if I killed someone which is myself looking back on it. I hold a cdl and wondering if that is going to be a useless fake credit card that you receive in the mail. I lost my job after truthfully telling them. Now next week 1/24 COURT the black robe the gavel my fate to follow. I hear that there is 4 appearances but, I know everything is already determined the first meeting through standards of the state law; other than on how to divide up fees Court fees and other associated fees. This is the most expense drink I had in my life hell growing up 2 kids and got a divorce was cheaper.</p>

I hate to say welcome to the club, but I also had a CDL and yes it is going to be like those fake credit cards that come in the mail, I used to pull doubles and now I can't even pull a straight truck and it's been two years, I know that it was my fault for driving that night,but it still seem unfair, do you know that a guy can have an accident in a CMV and be found at fault sue to speeding and he will get treated better than you and I even though we were in our private owned auto thanks to the insurance companies, I think about the checks that I missed since the DUI, and the one to come and just get depressed, I see truck and daydream for a minute and say everthing is going to be alright, but the truth is , it's going to be hard if not impossible, but it's a dream. You have one thing that working for you and that your age, I am 57, that put a damper on my getting back in the saddle ( plus the fact that I have diabetes and the stress has put it out of wack ) but I don't know, if no one hires me, I'm going to buy my own truck and try it that way, anyway, I wish you luck and would love it iff you kept me informed

I hate the legal system! I am in the same situation...i wasn't even caught driving, i had the keys in the ignition PARKED not going anywhere. They took my license, which forced me to quit my amazing job. So now up to $7000 paying for this "dwi" with no job and a baby i can hardly support. Its unreal how they treat everyone the same when we all do not deserve this.

Sorry that you too fell into this trap, our federal government blackmails the states by witholding funds from them if they do not prosecute DUI drivers, this is OUR FEDERAL DOLLARS at work, they do not care of the harm that it brings, the families that it destroys, it is the puppet of the dollar, the insurance industries spends billions with the government and they help call the shots. But the bitter pill to swallow is that we are to blame, but does the punishment fits the crime, in most cases not,we are treated as if we killed someone, yes I was wrong to drive drunk that night, but the government was wrong in taking away employment from me and then tell me to pay fines or else. Yes I too hate this legal system

I really feel for you. My son is going through the same thing. He went to school for Hvac and did very well. He went to a party where the kids faked taking a drink out of some container and he drank it. I am not sure what was in it but he crashed his vehicle and totalled it. He was in the hospital with injuries and they found alcohol in his blood. I feel so bad for people who go through this. The only way out of this is lots of money. Rich people get away with it. My son has no money no job and no license and threats of jail time if his does not come up with it. I wish there was a support group out there. Good luck. I feel your sadness.

Thank you and good luck to your son also, this is sad to say but it is a money game, the same people that allow it to be sold are the same people that are prosecuting people for it. A lot of people that if not for a DUI would have never seen the inside of a jail. I think that if the government really wanted to help and stop the use of alcohol it could, they could limit the content of alcohol and make it mandatory that no drinks have more than say 2%, but this would either take money out of their pockets or not put money into their pockets (DUI's would drop) so not until we have a group that stand together and fight the DUI laws will we see a change, I wish your son the best and with luck they will give him another chance

Hi DaeDae,
I wish I could say things have turned around and are looking better for me but I can't. But I will reiterate a thought we have shared. That YES, there needs to be a group to lobby for the rights, recovery and rehabilitation of DUI offenders. But first there needs to be a term coined for us. Without a term we are just DUI offenders, and any likely response to our condition will be swept aside with "yeah, so what. They got a DUI and now they're paying for it."

Until we coin a term for people like us (we can call ourselves Xcivilians for now)

People whos -lives have been destroyed,
-Made unable to work, or be employed because of workplace insurance stipulations and background checks
-Who face arrest if they don't continue to pay fines which they have no income to pay,
-Who have been left completely unable to support and provide for themselves and their families
-Who can no longer even commit their lives to the military in wartime because of DUI inflicted probation
-People unable to be employed as a taxi; delivery driver; fireman; paramedic; commercial truck driver; postal worker; mechanic; construction laborer or equipment operator; Bus driver; UPS driver; culligan water guy; HVAC technician; sprinkler fitter; mechanic; pizza delivery guy; mobile security officer; sheriff or highway patrol; anything to do with parks and recreation maintenance; any state or government agency period, etc etc etc, the list goes on and on.
-People who face depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts because their entire livelihood has been ripped away and their truly is no hope in their future.

(like I said, lets just cal ourselves Xcivilians for this example)

We are clearly something more than just DUI offenders.

When govt officials, whoever hears DUI offenders, they say "yeah, so... tghey need to do their time and pay their fines"

Thats all they think of. Because DUI offenders are at a glance just DUI offenders.

Nothing in the group title of "DUI Offenders" addresses how regulation has destroyed their lives, and any chance of recovering and being able to be a contributing member of society again.
It only addresses that they are criminals

WE NEED to invent a new term for ourselves which addresses what regulation has inflicted on our lives

Then others can unite nationwide in support of (Xcivilians) again just a temporary term for this example.

Because people just can't unite in support of DUI offenders, they won't.

The notion of REHABILITATING DUI offenders just receives the same solution, alcohol rehab, jail time, take their license away, stick em in a clean and sober house, make them go to AA, etc

These are not the main issues we face.

We are not all alcoholics needing rehab.

We are more than that, and we need to appoint a term for our condition that addresses us as real people, formerly productive members of society, people who have done their time and payed their dues, but yet will forever be crucified on paper.


I would also like to add that I have applied with local agencies and school districts to be a DUI/alcohol abuse educator.
When I was in school, we had DARE. It was very ineffective. They didn't tell us much except that drugs and alcohol are bad and nobody will like you....

If they would introduce a DUI offender to students, someone to tell them how a DUI has truly ruined their life, guess what, people would really not want to drink.

But guess what else, I am ineligible for employment with any CA school districts because of my DUI. So I cannot share my story in schools to help educate students on the real ramifications of drinking. Hmmmm. Real good system they have there....

I am done for now. I hope things are looking up for you DaeDae. In creating this forum discussion, you really have helped so many of us in more ways than any of us can express. It really helps to know that we are not all truly alone in this. Take care my friend.
-Rob

I'm 49 I was hit by a drunk driver with no insurance ,I had a great job as a commercial diver making great money .The wreck broke my neck i can't get hired with neck damage nobody will hire a diver with neck problems no matter what a doctor says.So now I have to go back to college a get a degree and at 49 its a little hard to keep paying bills and try to pay for school ,so please think twice before drinking a driving.

Trust me when I say that I feel sorry for for you, no one should suffer from the pain that others cause, and like left and right, we all make decision, and if just for one second we had chosen not to drink and drive, we probably wouldn't be on this site, but what a lot of people fail to bring into account is the fact that alcohol changes the way one thinks, under the influence you lose the ablity to do a lot of things that you normanly could do, such as walk a straight line, talk without a slur and memory lost where a person can't even count from 1 to 10 backwards, so why is this drug sold without repercussion to the manufacture, it's because the government see a profit, how many mind altering drugs are legal to sell for the intent to alter the mind, I am not saying we are not at fault here, because we are but the co-defendents are alcohol manufacture and our government for allowing it, every state has a speeding limit, why not make all alcohol content mandortory lower, if all alcohol content was 2%, DUI's and alcohol related accidents would be down, so again I am sorry for what the use of alcohol has done to you, but as I said, we are only part to blame and I myself have giving up drinking completely

It's all just a great opportunity for a desperate government. The courts, judges, lawyers, rehabilitation centers bla bla bla. All non-producers of anything tangible and all should be eliminated. Unfortunately we have to wait for our country to collapse to watch these pathetic nothings crumble.

I would never advocate drinking and driving. However any real man (meaning he would say what he really believes) would tell you that a few beers and a drive home is not a problem. Unfortunately this is a woman thing with many men sucking up to women making the majority fall in a category to get arrested. Police are those non real men sucking up to women as well.

I got my first DUI 8 days ago . I am in FLorida , i'm on a 42 day temp license that allows me to drive to and from work , educational purposes and medical . I hired an attorney and awaiting to see if DA will allow me to go into derivation program . Right now a waiting game . My husband has explained to me how upset he is ...i can't argue with him . But, he makes it all about how he is affected by this , how he is SO stressed out , how he wants a divorce to protect himself and the kids from my legal problems. He never once asked me how I and dealing with this . I told him today i need him to be by my side ...as per my lawyer i have a year of this to go through . He says he wants a divorce and we can still be together . I told him i will sign what he wants , but there is NO US anymore ...i can't be with a man that can't even be there for me as my husband ...what makes me think he will as a boyfriend. I spoke to my lawyer ...there is ZERO legal crap he will get involved in . It' a DUI ... i'm not selling drugs or making it . I'm scared . lost most of all HURT .... i cry all the time . And to hear this from the one person i thought would be there for me doesn't want too ...it's like a double whammy. DUI and divorce REALLY ! I guess it's for the best ..if i had cancer or a brain tumor he would have bailed on me , because he wouldn't want to deal with financial problems. He accused me of being selfish and only think of my self not how this is affecting him and the kids . Kids doesn't know ...Christmas shopping is done ...now just have to see what court cost and fees will be and a payment plan might be due-able . He also makes me feel like **** ... brings it up ...lets me know how messed up this is . I can't catch a break . I know what i did ,,, aND i take full responsibly for it . The law is putting me down ...but to hear it over and over from ur spouse everyday ...it's worse than the law .

Wow, maybe it best, this guy is a selfish little man, he is letting his pride destroy his marriage, he's embarrassed by this but what he should think is that you may be also, a DUI is not the worst thing that a person can do also, does he drink, have he ever had too much to drink, and have he ever had a drink and drove and auto, it only takes one drink to get a DUI. Look it up on your computer and see some of the powerful people that are in American that has been charged with a DUI,example, both Presidents Bush and **** Cheney were charged with a DUI, there has been Judges , doctors ,lawyers, policemen , priest even that have been charge with a DUI, do not get me wrong, this do not make our actions right, nor any less harmful than the next person. Life is about learning, and we make mistakes alone the way, this is what makes us human, let your husband know that if he loves you like you think that he does, he needs to be there by your side and put the anger aside. Now as for you, never again should you say your first DUI ( what do you expect to get more ) we can live and enjoy our life without the use of alcohol, as a parent, set the example that you want your kids to follow and they will. You are going to make it out of this alive trust me, so tell youir husband that the DUI diid not make you lose any love for him at all and maybe he will also grow with you through this, good luck and if you ever want to talk , vent or just need a shoulder, we are here for you

Oh no ...i do not expect any more DUI's . Just saying " it was my first " . Yes , my husband drinks and yes he has drove many times . Yes , he did say it could have been him . But, he is selfish . He only sees this as affecting HIM ONLY . He not once has asked me how i am feeling ,,, how i am dealing with this . All the crying i have done and now a divorce . This is plain crazy . He doesn't see this as a way for us to grow he just i believe wants out of marriage . Which makes zero sense to me . You don't want to be married , because ur afraid of legal issues he might get into , but he still wants us to be together . I told him once i sign ..we are done . I am 30 ...i still have my looks i can find love and someone to support any ordeals that may happen in life . MY boss told me " he just wants the better in our marriage " Not the worse " . I am truely alone in this and will be for the next year until this is over with . Just sad the one person i thought i can count on is bailing on me over a DUI . : ((

Hi, sadness come with the job of having a DUI, if it did not effect you, then you would have a problem, sure he wants to sleep with you after a divorce, why look for a new partner when he can go for a sure thing. Do not let your husband make you any more upset than you are already, if other family members know about your DUI, lean on them for support, don't give up on your husband, every man woman and child has been a jerk at one time or another but that doesn't mean that they would be a jerk for life, give it time. Let your husband know that you will never get another DUI and that you would love to raise your kids with their dad in there home as a family, but to fight and be cold over problems that arise,divorce maybe the best thing. I wish your husband could maybe see some of the stories on here, he would find out that we are all human. Anyway, keep your head up and do not let this take control of your life, you are not the first to get a DUI nor will you be the last, but you can make it your last DUI by not drinking, after the cost of a DUI with fines insurance and a lawyer, you could have a nice down payment on something that you could use as a family ( home, car, me a christmas gift ). So when your husband walks in, instead of run from him, walk up to him and give him a hug, if he still cry divorce, then maybe you are better off without him in your life, well write back when ever you want to talk, we know your pain

i so feel ur pain,,,even though i did do it several times, i beleieve ive learned my lesson, ive never hurt anyone and i cant drive, ive lost my job too, payed thousands and thousands,, i finally got a job lined up made the plan sold my car, rented out my place, found a roomate that would drive me to work everyday and i bought my bus ticket, planned housing down there too and now i get a text saying dont bother , u just failed the backround check,,, no felonies, just misdemeanors,, as a former Marine i think its ******* insane not to let me on a base to work,, i wouldnt ******* goto work drunk or drive even cheat and drive anyways, i also am sitting on my couch all day doing ******* nothing,,, i cant stand not working, ive done the marines with ease, iraq, afghan was nothing to me, went to school, got bored and went to commercial dive school, did awesome! was a real estate agent too in the middle, my life is a roller coaster because of ******* dwi's. i really dont want to live without a license. i hate asking for rides because i never want to bother on anyone, i dont ,,, unfucking beleivable. im a very moral person, i dont even like to stomp on spiders, and never make fun of anyone, and genuinly care about others, the only reason im still here is because if i did hurt myself, i dont want to make my family miserable for ever. My lawyer says ya, just move to a big city, oh and get a dive job there? wtf, there is no answer for me, and i cant ******* deal ,, i hate the label, and i hate myself, i know ive worked harder than anyone i know and it keeps squashing me, im in tears as i type this. but hey man , we jsut got to hold on, i cant even walk to the gas station for food cuz theres going to be 3 friggin feet of snow. Im running out of my budget and running up on optioins,,,if i hang in there u got to too. I still dont know what to do though,, but when u cant hold on , hold on i guess vdgv................=o(

You show a lot of fortitude, which is very inspiring. Don't hate yourself because you did a good thing for people by sharing your feelings and showing how it's possible to keep moving on. Don't let the DUI define who you are. You clearly have strength and determination, and it appears you can take on new challenges if you put your mind to it. The DUI is just one of life's challenges you can overcome..it is not who you are as a person.

DUI's have become a business more than anything. From the lawyers to the states to the interlock device manufacturers. Everyone has a hand out and they typically get their payment because people convicted are often times honest people with no criminal intent, thus they will pay. I acknowledge a DUI is serious and people do die as a result of DUI's. That being said no one on this board has killed anyone or you wouldn't be posting... So learn from it and move on. I will be the guy to say it, DESPITE WHAT EVERYONE TELLS YOU NO ONE DIED, you are not horrible people and DUI's are EXTREMELY common (difference being some of us get caught). I had a DUI and did not lose my job, when moving to a different employer when asked on the applications I disclosed it and most HR professionals didn't care or ask further. DUI's don't keep people from getting jobs, now a neck tattoo... that may prevent it;) Keep moving forward.

I go through that feeling all the time, there is no answer that would turn back the hands of time, but at 28 you have a good chance of getting through this . I wish you luck

I was arrested for DUI on June 25. although I like to drink I am not an alcoholic, sometimes I go six months without a single drop! and I hate the label that has been given to me because of the DUI. I have lost my job, I'm completely in financial ruins and possibly going to be homeless in the next month, I am 28 and have never been arrested and I have never been in any kind of trouble with the law. My story begins after working a 10 hour shift, I was tired but a friend invited me to her birthday party at her favorite spot, I figured I would go and show support and had a drink with her. After the party I was ready to go home but instead decided to crash at a motel 2 blocks away, unfortunately if I left my car at the bar I would have been towed so I decided to drive to the motel. I was pulled over right in front of the motel. as daedae513 put it best the rest is crap. oh and on the police report he put that I did not use my signal lights at all even when he pulled me over which was bullshit because I looked at my car when they were putting me in the police car and my blinkers were still on.
This all took place in California, I feel sorry for anyone who has a DUI but a DUI does not destroy your life DUI laws do. I have been massively depressed and Ive been fighting suicidal thoughts every time a collections call me. I have also considered becoming and alcoholic to justify the DUI. I used to think that I had a bright and successful future with my career, now I feel like there is no end to this gut wrenching feeling. I'm to the point where i hate everyone and everything and would rather slit my wrists than pay to the state of California.

Yah, DUI laws are pretty tough. I wish there was one, sure-fire way to avoid getting confronted with all those consequences. But there isn't. Sometimes people hold you at gunpoint and force you to drink outside your home, then they duct-tape your keys to your hand and hold a knife you your back and lead you to your car, and make you start it and go out driving on public highways. So really there's no way around it.

So, orgasmi, if you were talking to someone at a dinner party, which I doubt you would ever go to since you're a hermit likely to be featured soon on Hoarders, would you treat that person with the disrespect you've just shown here?

Honestly, if anyone were as high and mighty as you I'd worship that person as I would the Lord Jesus Christ. Fortunately that person doesn't exist. Give it a f*cking rest already.

For New Years 2012 I went to a party with a bunch of crooked people I thought were my friends... an hour after the ball dropped I was betrayed and kicked out of the party. I was a 30-minute drive from my house and knew I was well above the legal limit. So I went back to my car planning to wait until I *felt* sober enough to drive home. What I didn't realize in my stupor was that it would take probably 3, if not 4 hours for that to happen, and I could have called my parents to come out and get me, which they certainly would have done considering the alternative. After just THIRTY MINUTES I wrongly considered myself sober enough to drive, and headed out of the parking garage and down a side street to get to the highway, instead of passing through the downtown area that was probably infested with police patrols. Although I didn't swerve or fail to maintain my lane, I drove the first ten minutes or so with DRUNK WITH NO HEADLIGHTS... which is literally as risky as driving over 200 km/h on the freeway while sober. A few minutes after getting on the highway I finally realized my headlights were off, turned them on, and drove the rest of the way home calmly and only a trickle above the speed limit.

Although I was not caught, I still to this day get scared over just how risky of a move I made. I fully acknowledged to myself that if I had been caught, nobody should have any sympathy for me. I know I could have killed someone that night, and know that the DUI penalties are severe enough for a reason: society would much rather ruin a drunk driver's life without directly harming them than for an innocent person probably much better off than the drunk driver be DIRECTLY INJURED OR KILLED.

If people are made homeless because of the effects of a DUI, then it's a natural consequence they must suffer. They should think about all the innocent people killed by drunk drivers before even thinking about getting others to feel sympathetic about their situation.

Well loud mouth, some people do not agree with you, every person that drink and drive does not kill or have accidents and another thing, do you know that more people are killed by speeders that drunk drivers more by distracted drivers than drunk drivers, and I will bet a buck that you have done BOTH ! Your loud mouth said nothing and for someone that is so high and mighty, why didn't you turn yourself in the next day or the next week for that matter, you jerks kill me being on your high horse and all, yeah sainthood is just around the corner for you and your kind, right. It a foolish law that punhish you because you COULD have or What if, and for anyone that agrees with it is a foolish person, so wiith that being said,keep your foolish remarks to yourself and live your self righteous life without making mistakes.

Reading this has been a blessing... I'm single Mom in ****** Arizona who had to plead guilty to 1st time ATTEMPTED DUI. I wasn't even driving!!!! I now have to spend 10 days in jail. My DUI was 3 years ago. I've lost everything. I've since become a first time Mom and my judge is still forcing me to go to jail and she refuses to let me serve weekends. I breastfeed my child and I can't find one single piece of info to see if I will even be allowed to use a B Pump!!! How can this state be so backward?? What about my child, what the hell is going to happen to him? I have no job bc I am now unemployable so I can't get work release and ofcourse being a single parent is apparently not a job. That's crap, it's incredibly hard!! So now this state will ruin mine and my son's life because I have no way to pay for him to have daycare for 24 hours a day for ten days. He refuses formula so howcwill he eat??? Thank you America for ruining a baby's life for something you THINK his mom might have done. I lay awake all night clutching him and crying. I feel like I'm going to die...

How can a government treat it people like this yet help other countries out with money that they received from taxes that we still contribute to, I be the first to say that I'm pissed off at the way I've been treated. I see people that have commited crimes with intent being treated better than I have, yes I am bitter and I know that someday people will come together and fight back on these laws that the federal government has made without thinking of the harm it's doing to people that only crime was to drive while under the influence. I no longer vote as I refuse to help someone get a job that either helped endorsed these laws or stand by them. I think that the judge that you had was a real loser in this, to turn your back on people has to be a bigger crime than some DUI laws, as a judge she has the power to override any decision that she has made, but like the federal government they have lost feeling for people.I wish you the best in this, and if there was something that I could do for you I would, but like you this DUI has me in a bind, I can only lend a shoulder for now, so you do have people that understand your feelings and we concider you a friend

got convicted of my first dui sept. 9, I am 48 years old and this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I feel all of yall. I have thought about just dissapearing in the mountains somewhere and living off the land, hoping to never see another person as long as i live, but every day i ask god to get me thru this,so far I havent lost it.Dont know what the future holds just hoping for the best and takin it day by day. Everyone keep your heads up. I wish u all the best and remember that bad things happen to good people and we will get thru this.

fishingfool, it should be "convicted of my first and last DUI". And so many of us have felt the same way as you at one time or another, it's as if my life has stopped, I'm stuck on that day that I got arrested and charged with a DUI. The federal government is destroying lives instead of detering driving while under the influence

Thanks DaeDae but my license will be dirty for a total of 10 years per California law. I have considered moving to another state but my record will remain dirty wherever I go for as long as it is tainted here in Ca.<br />
The only suggestion I have is there needs to an advocacy group to correct what has been taken from people like us. But first there needs to be a new terminology for our condition. A classification. So far, all we are is DUI offenders and as such are just classified as criminal at a glance and nothing more. We are not viewed as humans. <br />
We need a classification which indicates we are regular people. People whos complete ability to survive and provide has been destroyed by the inequities of the american justice system and insurance industry. That we are not criminals, but because of a non violent crime, the loopholes in government mandated insurance regulations in the workplace have rendered us unemployable.<br />
If we cannot work, then what can we do? We can be what many consider a burden on society, as long as we are eligible for unemployment. Then we can just be a burden on whoever is willing to help us survive. Inevitably, we become homeless. Or transient as the new term is coined. And then we are a complete burden to all of society. An eyesoar. <br />
As I said, until we coin a new term for ourselves which classifies us a people unemployable because of regulation, then there will be no lobbying to rectify the policies which have destroyed our livelyhood. All we are at a glance is DUI offenders. And we will continue to hear the same response, which is just "get a job you lowlife"

LostHope94558 I have been out of work since 12/14/2010, I also have tried everything, why would someone want to check your license and demand a clean license for a job that has nothing to do with driving I'll never know, the federal government and insurance companies are to blame for this job black balling that some of us recieved, the justice system needs an overhaul, I will never forget the day that I paid for my temporary license, and with that and the fines I had paid it was over 1500 and I read in the paper that day of a man being convicted of the rapeing of two girls age 8 and 10 and he recieved probation and a 1450 dollar fine, I had paid over 1500 and still had fines to pay all while out of work, talking about a bitter pill to swallow. Someone in the federal government should take a look at the outcome of what a DUI does to people, from the fear of prison to the heavy fines to the lost of income is to much to pay for a crime that most of us done without doing any damage to anything,a lot of us have commited a victimless crime, yet we are paying for it as if we're public enemy number one. Well all I can tell you is to hang on in there, and also since you had your DUI in 09, it's been three years and your license should be clear enough to start over, anyway, don't give up, it's a screwed up world we live in, but it's all we have

The effect s of having a DUI can truly ruin a persons life now but there is noone to tell you that beforehand. Not all DUI offenders intended to drink and drive nor had much choice. In may of 2009, I was staying at my girlfriends house and we were entertaining a few friends for the night. One of her friends bumped into her with a wine glass severing a vain in her wrist. She had to go to the hospital that nightmand the police officer who arrived to take a report insisted that we all had to leave and that I could not leave my car there or it would face a 30 day impound. He would be back in 25 minutes to make sure we were gone and would arrest us for drunk in public if he saw us walking. That night we could not get a cab for at least an hour and a half and the only available towing company were was chartered out to the police department for the night. At the time, I lived in a different city and staying with my girlfriend was regular thing half of the time. I wasn't about to drive home out of town and had to chose the lesser of two evils. One of our friends there lived about a quarter mile away and so that is where we went, having no choice, we had to go somewhere. We made it to his house without a problem and as soon as I pulled into his driveway, the same police officer pulled up behind and arrested me without any questions. <br />
Since then my life has been ruined. I would have rather crashed and died that night even if it meant killing someone else. Since then, I lost my job and am unemployable. It has been 3 years now that I have been out of work. I have lost everything. I have been living on my mothers couch for 2 and a half years now, there really is no hope left. I cannot go into school for a new career because everything is insurance regulated now and I am considered a liability. I talked to every military recruiter I could about joining a branch. At this point I would easily risk my life for my country for minimum wage of it meant a small paycheck and some hope for a future. But I can never join the military now because of this. Funny how undocumented illegals can join the service, so can serious felons, but I can't. Why can't I give my life for my country at the frontlines of battle? Apparently, my life is worth absolutely nothing now. Yet if I were to be commit suicide, I would be committed as insane or mentally unstable. Really, tell me what is insane about ending a life with no hope, no future, nothing ahead but homelessness, hunger, inability to acquire healthcare?<br />
So often I hear the same general solutions, start up a business, go work at McDonalds or TacoBell. Believe me I have filled applications and submitted resumes to every restaurant, fast food diner, clothing or grocery store, state agency, post office, temp agency, construction company, etc. Every employer conducts background checks, and believe me, restaurants do not just hire anyone who walks in just because you need a job, contrary to some peoples stupid generalizations. With all of the government and state agencies created to rehabilitating this and preserving that, there is not a single one to help a DUI offender reacquire employment. I guess I'm just as evil as a terrorist. If there was true education of the after effects of having a DUI, I can guarantee you there will be fewer of them, because if there's any chance that you are DUI, then a police officer may as well be Jason Vorhees, run. Run every stop sign, red light, cut off pedestrians, do whatever, just don't get caught. Seriously, you may as well be in prison for the rest if your life because otherwise you will be just as unemployable and unable to provide for yourself or a family. At least in prison you will have clean clothes, a dry bed, 3 square meals a day. The DUI alone will just get you homelessness. Did the legislature ever consider these long term casualties of their policies? Of course not, they never take careful consideration of long term effects. This not fall under the category of cruel and unusual punishment. I have had all of my livelyhood taken away and there is nothing left of me. Do you perceive my frustration to be ...unreasonable? Am I "mentally unstable" in your eyes? Go to hell you vindictive pile of crap. You have your vengeance. If I could give my life and give you back your daughter or son, I would. But guess what, it wont. Nothing will. THEY ARE GONE. Now your mission is taking the families, the hopes, the dream, the futures from others.

I was received my second DUI April 20, 2012, the first was July, 2007 two months shy of 5 years. It was a stupid, careless mistake on my part, and I really did not have much to drink that night, but also didn't eat anything beforehand, and it affected me. I tried to sleep it off for an hour in my car before I had to drive home, and because I was lost and looking at the GPS instead of the road, I neglected to yield to another driver, who collided into me. The speed limit was 35 but neither of us were doing that when the crash occurred, my air bags did not deploy, it was not that hard a hit; however, the other driver and passenger allege whiplash and called 1800 ASK GARY to try to bleed me of any funds that they assume I have, which I do not. I am in no way trying to lessen my irresponsibility that night, but it was a stupid mistake that I am trying to rectify. I have not been convicted yet, I go to court the 19th, and have been checking in weekly for pretrial services, going to counseling weekly, signed up for level 2 DUI school, been to AA meetings as required although I am in no way an alcoholic or I may have had more tolerance for the few drinks that I had that night. I am facing 30 days jail, 1 year probation, thousands in fines, court costs, community service and an interlock device, but not eligible for hardship license for second DUI conviction. I cannot see the prosecution lessening my charges, and am unable to afford a good attorney, the public defender seems totally ineffective thus far, and I am really scared that I am going to lose my job as a result of this. My husband has to take off work to bring me to court, public defender appointments, and counseling, and each time he loses money that supports myself and my 3 chilldren. I make minimum wage since I have been a stay at home mom for 13 years and just entered the workplace again 6 months ago, despite getting my Associates degree and acquiring $23k in student loans, I am sick about what I have done and have not been able to sleep much since this happened. I am afraid to face this jail time and have no clue who will watch my children when I do, they are 12, 11, and 7. Their father has to work and I have no friends or family willing to help. I have panic attacks, and my counselor that I am required to see documented my anxiety issues and how sick with worry that I am about this whole situation, but have no health insurance for a physician to prescribe anything to help me. I was properly insured up to $100k for the repairs and possible medical bills for the other vehicle involved, and am doing everything in my power to do the right thing here, even moving my family to Gainesville so that I can utilize the public transportation available there since there is none where I live. I am waiting to hear from the apartment as I type this, but am fearful that I may be declined because of my driving record. How do people put these types of indiscretions/events behind them when jobs and apartment applications all run your background? I am afraid the reason that the better jobs I have applied for in the past have not called me because of this blemish on my driving record. Reading these posts have helped me some, at least I am not alone in this situation, but I really wish that I was a celebrity or able to afford a good attorney so that I could maybe negotiate a lesser charge. I doubt that the prosecution will even entertain such a thought since the other vehicle involved alleges injuries and have retained an attorney. I honestly do not believe that they were injured much, if at all, since I was not and my air bags did not deploy, but because I blew a .153 and .146, I am at fault. I am praying to God that I survive this ordeal because right now, I do not see how I can. I can't leave my children unattended, my husband can't take off work everytime I need to satisfy an obligation to the court or he could lose his job, I will definitely lose my job if I go to jail for 30 days and then who will hire me after? How will I pay these fines? <br />
Thank you for listening.<br />
<br />
AF

We all know how you feel,and I wish you the best in your outcome, the amount of the damages to the autos can help you out as far as the judge goes, if the other party hasn't hikes up the cost, I think that the judge will have a heart and just give you a fine and lost of license, it's sad that the price that they make us pay can be so steep that we can't climb out for a couple of years because of bad judgement. After your court date, I would advise you to give drinking up, you have kids, and what would you do if you just had a couple of beers and then all of a sudden one of your kids had to go to the hospital, the first thing that you would do is put all the kids in the car and head off to the hospital, not thinking that by doing so you have just broken the law, no feeling is worth going through this nightmare of a DUI again for me and I'm sure that you too will feel this way, anyway, good luck and keep your head up

Thank you, I appreciate the support. The funny thing is, I never drink, and the handful of times that I have in the past 5 years, I end up in jail or some kind of trouble, so you're right, I should not drink. I hope the judge is somewhat lenient, maybe go for the state minumums and not the maximums, but only time will tell. In the meantime, I am doing everything that is required of me as far as weekly check-ins with pretrial, AA, level II DUI school ($400 :O), and weekly counseling sessions, thank God they're discounted (only $25), I hope the judge sees I am taking this seriously and doing my best to rectify the situation. I will never put myself in this situation again, it's too shamfeul, costly and honestly not worth it.

I'm a spouse of a DUI .. Let me tell this has made my life a living hell.. <br />
I am the sole supporter in my family , my wife is a stay at home mom and had three DUI .. She can't drive and I have to take time out of my day to take her to her <br />
Meetings and other appointments.. I also have a business to run and town houses that I rent, her family is worst than her and won't lift a finger to help her or even just simply drive her, instead they would rather help her older sister along as they feel I should do it all, I don't drink at all , they taught her to drink as her father is an alcoholic and drank in front of her and her siblings every day.. I mean to this day her father will drink with her or offer her a beer despite the fact she's already had 3 DUI and is on her last leg.. <br />
They don't ******* get it, I'm doing so much to pick up for the slack and after three years it's finally catching up.. When I make a<br />
Statement if how this is all affecting <br />
Me she minimizes what all I have to set aside for her, this is a double wammy, I lose time and money at work , it costs me money for her classes also costs me money for gas.. I wish their was some way I can state to the court that their rulings make the spouse a victim to the court.. It kills me when I'm in the super market and see women by them selves toting around two kids and be self sufficient .. All I think is god where did I go wrong

Also cause of this I lost my Mercedes Benz , all the money for ankle monitor .. Whenever my children want to go somewhere , I have to take them.. I'm dealing with everyday hustle and bustle and can't wait to go home to relax only I'm afraid of what I have to do when I go home , go to the store take so and so here and there..
When do I ever have time for myself, this is driving me crazy...
I mine as well as be a single parent , I love my wife she does try to do her part as in clean and keep the house up, other than she Hardly cooks me meals , which annoys me but oh well..
I'm just wondering if I'm the wrong one here, I feel like I'm being mean and that's making me stressed as well , but all of this makes me not act like myself..

well thank you, i know im not alone.....i dont want to sound conceded, or like im the only one that has ever gone through this.....but i had no idea until i had to go through it..... and i doubt others truly know unless they go through it as well.....i just cant seem to come to an understanding as to how this is a fare situation for anyone........ ya know, if someone was hurt or killed, i can understand how it could affect someones life this much (and i probably still wouldnt gree with it simply due to the fact that i think DUI ramifications are a load of crap); however, i cannot understand how if no one was hurt/killed, and no accident was involved, it can basically ruin a life. and i use to think the same thing....i can handle anything.....damn, was i wrong. i use to be able to hold my head up high......god himself couldnt make me hold my head up now..... its one thing to punish me.....go ahead, punish ME.....but to tie my hands and make it to where i cant support my family, to allow it to affect THEM....... F*** everyone that had anything at all to do with allowing a DUI to affect someones life this much. F*** them. and if you are reading this, you piece of S*** i would gladly say it to your face, but i seriously doubt any of you would have the balls to come face to face with any of us, so this is as good as it gets i suppose.......F**** YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br />
i shouldnt have to fight the thought of suicide and the inability to support my family because your an ignorant F***head. and i honestly think Lawmakers should be stood in a line and executed. Better yet, i think that would be too good for them and an easy out. Maybe they should all be restrained, tied to tables, and tortured to death, slowly.....or MAYBE, they should have to watch while their families are slowly tortured to death. How would you dips***s feel if you were helpless to protect those that you love and care about????? <br />
<br />
im not a violent person, unless you screw with my family...... and i really do believe in an eye for an eye. and i do truly believe to the deepest parts of my soul that our system needs to disappear, that civil war needs to flourish, and we need to start from scratch. complete system overhaul, and the people need to bear arms and take this country back, by any means necessary.the people in charge of OUR country have had every chance under the sun to do right by us. How long do they think we will just let them beat us and shackle us, slowly taking our rights and enslaving us? I guess the real question should be, how long will we allow them to do this to us?<br />
<br />
once again pissed, and in tears thinking about my family...<br />
CJ--out.

it looks like im a little late to be posting here....i guess im ok with that, i suppose it just helps to get it out, even if no one is there to listen.....im 26, the only trouble i have ever been in is a single DUI. i recently got married. and now am a father-to-be. i cant count the number of ways this little red x on my record has screwed me. i cant get a job to save my life. im drowning in bills i cant pay. my wife, bless her soul, is understanding and patient.....but she gets (rightfully) scared and worried about a baby and money..... Christ, you want to talk about feeling worthless; make me watch my wife cry and look at me with disappointment. it breaks my heart. im treated worse than a damn killer when i apply for work for god sake. Damn, we made a mistake; WE ARE ALL SORRY. none of us deserve to go through all of this because of a stupid mistake......we learned our lesson. they dont need to ***** us of our dignity, tear us down further than they already have. i dont dare speak for anyone else about this part, but i am left with zero respect for myself, zero self worth, i dont even feel like i deserve another breath. I love my wife (and my unborn child) more than anything--and now i feel like they would be better off without me. it brings me to my knees and tears fly everytime i think it, but i havent changed my mind yet. i mean i dont even know if i will EVER be able to get a job that pays more than minimum wage now. im told that enrolling in the medical program is just a waste of time now.... I would give my soul to watch the people that make these laws and punishments suffer for the rest of their miserable lives. i made a poor decision one night.....do i really deserve to possibly lose my wife, have her look at me with such disappointment and hurt, not be able to provide for her? do i really deserve to wonder if i should just pull the trigger one night? im not that type of person, but im not sure that i want to be a part of a society with a system of "justice" that has no justice to it. it is not justice when good people make bad decisions and have to walk around with their head to the ground and deal with endless repercussions for the rest of their life....Wheres the justice in that? we deal with their "punishments" unable to provide for our families and limited in our opportunities, while they roll in money.....Wheres the justice in that? i read an article that said a Lawmaker can invoke a special privilege and when they do, they CANNOT be charged with a DUI .......wheres the justice? they can take our lives away and make us contemplate horrid things. Render us unable to do simple tasks such as provide. Keep us from certain careers. Make us pay ungodly amounts in fines, and reek havoc on our self esteem and mental stability and SO MUCH MORE..... but they can go out and do the same things, if not worse, than we do-- and NOT have to worry about consequences?<br />
<br />
WHERE IS THE F***ING JUSTICE?????? <br />
<br />
(i know i kinda went all over the place the further i went.....sorry, i was trying to keep from crying. it didnt work.)<br />
<br />
i guess for now, its CJ--out....<br />
(might be my new favorite quiet place to yell......who knows).....

Hi CJ, the feeling that you are feeling are the same as mine, I can't even enjoy being around my friends any longer, since this DUI, I have the thought of suicide more than I have had the thought of beating this nightmare, I feel worthless in every way one could think, I looked for work and not even a reply back by most, I was once a proud man that thought that I could handle anything, but this DUI has brought me to my knees , I also read the story that the law maker's of this country can get away with prosecution of the law for a DUI,that really hurts, the same people that made these laws are immune to them and they could care less if they destroy a life or not. I do not have faith in the system any longer, I will no longer vote to put these people in office . I can not get over the fact that this crime did not cause an accident, but yet my life is ruin, I have been out of work for 14 months now, funds running low and no hope in sight, but I do not want to hurt others by committing suicide though I want to everyday, I'm tired, I don't want to fight anymore with the effects the DUI bring on, so I'm stuck in the middle, anyway, I just wanted to vent and to let you know that you are not alone

Same boat, i lost my license 3 years ago, i was engagged but she left me 2 months ago, just bought a house together, so i know were your coming from, but today i got my license back, finished studying, gotta find a career now. ******* sucks but just learn from it and man up

as far as man up, I have never deny that I was wrong, for I know too well what a drunk driver can do, what I'm saying is that unlike others, a CDL is treated differently than any other license , if I break the law, I must pay for my crimes true, but when you bend the law or make unjust laws, I have a problem with that and as far as not taking losing everything that I have for one mistake hard, well sue me for having a sense of worth, everyone situation is different in life just like feeling something that you handle well others fail at and vise a versa, I was not asking you to feel sorry for me, trust me I can do that by myself, I just put my feeling online

I am a 54 year old woman who got a DUI on Dec. 5, 2010. After being verbally abused by my husband of 28 years, I went out. Ran into some friends and made the mistake of driving 5 minutes home. My husband called in a missing persons on me. The cop stopped me because my car fit the desc<x>ription. I have only 3 speeding tickets on my record till now. I have an autoimmune disorder that I took presc<x>ription medication for. The drug was pulled by the FDA and I was suffering horrible withdrawal symptoms. I also have severe depression and anxiety. My doctor kept telling me I could not possibly still be suffering side effects but I was. Guess I self-medicated that night. After the humiliation of booking I left only to find my husband waiting for me outside the station very pissed. This is an *** who has smoked weed for 35 years and he has the nerve to judge me!!! I took a cab to a friends and spent the night, I came home the next day to being pushed and shoved, screamed at, name calling (****, *****, *****) After a few days I suffered a breakdown and ended up in the psych hospital, Was released after 5 days and sent to outpatient. Thank God I did not loose my job. I was stuck at home for 4 weeks going to OP and dealing with my husband. I finally could not take it anymore and moved out after 28 years. My mother recently passed away and left me some money, I got an apartment near town. That's not the end. He called everyone we knew family friends and told them about my DUI. He said he would ruin me and has pretty much done that, He is a chronic liar and has turned my children against me. I am a good person who made a mistake and I am truly sorry for the DUI. I work part-time and insure the family, Kids are 32, 28,23,15. My husband told my 15 year old awful lies about me and he doesn't speak to me anymore. My 32 year old daughter is a narcissist and is making my life miserable. She left her 6 month old and 6 year old sons to live with her boyfriend in Baltimore. Of course that didn't last and my husband let her come live with us after she came home. Did he ask me if it was ok? Of course not. I started divorce proceedings in mid Feb. First "great" lawyer did nothing 7,000 later. She is charging me interest on the 1,600 balance. Screw her. I had to hire the best and expensive law firm in the county. In one month spent 15,000 but am finally getting somewhere. I had to get an order of protection on my husband he was arrested 2 x already for harassing me. Once in grocery store on security cameras. He has done and said horrible things to me but got off last week on plea <br />
bargain 1 year court supervision, What's wrong with this picture? I have a Baiid that has already given a false positive. Now I have to have it 3 more months like I would be so stupid to drink and drive after what's happened? Yes, I take responsibility for what I did but should a DUI destroy your life? And of course I know drunk driving is wrong. I learned the hard way

Finally....justice served.

Just another piece to show what the people in charge will do, just glad that they got caught<br />
<br />
<br />
Ex-judge Makowski suspended six months<br />
False affidavit filed in lawyer's DWI case<br />
By Matt Gryta<br />
NEWS STAFF REPORTER<br />
Published:<br />
June 10, 2011, 11:39 PM<br />
3 Comments<br />
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<br />
Updated: June 11, 2011, 7:46 AM<br />
<br />
Former State Supreme Court Justice Joseph G. Makowski on Friday was suspended from practicing law for six months for trying to help now-disbarred lawyer Anne E. Adams beat a drunken-driving case by submitting a false affidavit in her defense three years ago.<br />
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In a two-page decision, the five-judge Appellate Division of State Supreme Court spared Makowski further professional punishment, citing his "previously unblemished record during his 31-year career." He could have been disbarred.<br />
<br />
In suspending Makowski the appellate court ruled that he must "successfully complete the Multistate Professional Responsibility Examination" before applying for reinstatement.<br />
<br />
Makowski submitted the false affidavit to Hamburg Town Court in an unsuccessful attempt to help lawyer Anne E. Adams, who was charged with driving while intoxicated on Sept. 2, 2008, after she was stopped on Route 5.<br />
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Makowski, who had been a judge for 10 years, could not be reached to comment Friday.<br />
<br />
Erie County District Attorney Frank A. Sedita III prosecuted Adams and forced Makowski to resign as a State Supreme Court justice, effective March 5, 2009, to avoid prosecution in the Adams case. He declined to comment Friday.<br />
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The court criticized Makowski for "engaging in illegal conduct that adversely reflects on the lawyer's honesty, trustworthiness or fitness as a lawyer."<br />
<br />
The appellate court also faulted him for conduct "involving dishonesty, fraud, deceit or misrepresentation."<br />
<br />
However, the appellate court also rejected complaints that before he was forced to resign, Makowski "sought private employment as an arbitrator or mediator in two matters that had been pending before him" as a judge.<br />
<br />
Richard T. Sullivan, the lawyer who represented Makowski, said he was "happy the court gave great weight" to character references about Makowski's "distinguished career" as both a lawyer and judge.<br />
<br />
Adams, 48, who ultimately was disbarred, began a month of weekends in jail on Oct. 1, 2010, on her misdemeanor plea in the Hamburg drunken-driving case. A former Erie County prosecutor, she had held a high-paying job at the University at Buffalo Law School.

Hi Dan,<br />
<br />
Well..I have to call shenanigans again...Ugh....they had to move my date to July because today the prosecutor was not prepared and did not bring my file to court.<br />
<br />
So, another month of anxiety but also a reprieve from sentencing. I am scheduling my DUI classes and may have them done by court time...start getting everything out of the way and done.<br />
<br />
I dont think the sentence will be TOO bad. My attorneys are filing motions to suppress alot of the evidence. We shall see.<br />
<br />
Let me know how you are doing.

keep your head up. i know people that have had 3 duis - they had to serve jail time. they seem to have accepted their situation and are moving on - nothing else to do, ya know. i'm going through my second one. first occurred in 2001 (amazing how they change the grace period in 2004 to 10 years from 7 and make it retroactive. i don't understand how that is constitutional). i'm just glad that there wasn't an accident and nobody else was injured / involved for either incident, but i'm seriously freaking out and pray for the best. i was very depressed the first week. the waiting is what's driving me nuts. i want to get the court and dmv situation handled and move on, quickly getting this behind me.<br />
<br />
i'm sure that doors will be opening for, good luck.

that is good that you have made up your mind that this thing isn't going to get the best of you, congrads. And I like so many others know that the wait is a punishment in itself, but kep your head up and in time we will all get through this, best of luck to you on your court date and anytime that you feel the need to vent or to talk with someone, email some of us, we're all we have as far as this DUI goes that understands the pain that this can cause, so again, good luck

Take Care

Dan

That so sucks!

tell me about, just goes to show you, its not what you do, its who you know

just an example of how the law can be bent<br />
<br />
<br />
July 23, 2010<br />
Donovan’s kid let off on DWI<br />
By Neale Gulley and Eric DuVall<br />
The Tonawanda News<br />
<br />
— — The daughter of a North Tonawanda city councilwoman was arrested for DWI following an accident two weeks ago, but the charges were subsequently reduced by prosecutors to two traffic tickets.<br />
<br />
Sara E. Donovan, 23, daughter of Councilwoman Nancy Donovan, was arrested by North Tonawanda police at 3:09 a.m. July 11, charging her with misdemeanor DWI and failure to maintain her lane. The incident occurred on Payne Avenue, where Donovan struck two parked cars. She was taken to DeGraff Memorial Hospital where she was evaluated and released back into police custody.<br />
<br />
Her blood alcohol content, which according to police records was verified by blood, urine and breath tests, was measured at 0.13 percent. The legal limit in New York state is 0.08 percent. Police records state she drove her gray Saturn into two parked cars, deploying her airbags while headed north on Payne Avenue on her way home from a bar on Webster Street. Donovan allegedly told police she had consumed two mixed drinks.<br />
<br />
The arrest was published in the July 13 edition of the Tonawanda News along with other police reports from that weekend, but no mention was made of her mother’s position as a councilwoman.<br />
<br />
That likely would have remained the case were it not for the way the situation was resolved in North Tonawanda City Court on Thursday, which two different New York DWI authorities have called highly unusual.<br />
<br />
Despite specific provisions in New York criminal law that make it almost unheard of for DWI arrests to result in non-alcohol related plea deals, Donovan took a plea deal Thursday to one speeding ticket for going 44 mph in a 30 mph zone and one parking ticket, both violations. According to court records, she paid a total of $280 in fines and was ordered to attend a DWI victim impact panel.<br />
<br />
“I don’t think that’s right,” said state DMV Communications Director Kevin Brown, who was audibly taken aback when told by a News reporter of the crime and its punishment.<br />
<br />
Donovan’s lawyer, former Niagara County Republican Committee Chairman Henry Wojtaszek, confirmed Friday that he contacted Niagara County District Attorney Michael Violante following her arraignment, asking for a reduction ba<x>sed on circumstances of the case he said justify the ruling. He would not say what those circumstances were.<br />
<br />
He denied that his past political connections played a role in his ability to negotiate so successfully with Violante and that it was Sara Donovan who called him, not Alderwoman-at-Large Nancy Donovan, a member of the same Republican Party Wojtaszek once ran.<br />
<br />
“I don’t believe I have spoken to her mother, in fact, I have not,” Wojtaszek said.<br />
<br />
Brown, speaking for the DMV, offered that such reduced outcomes do sometimes occur — a fact echoed by City Attorney Shawn Nickerson and former Erie County Chief DWI prosecutor Leonard Krawczyk, both of whom maintain private legal practices. But on the rare occasion that they do, Krawczyk said prosecutors must decide that, for any number of reasons, the charge “isn’t warranted.” Those reasons might include police failing to follow protocol or inaccurate blood alcohol tests, Krawczyk suggested.<br />
<br />
Otherwise, the state’s own DMV website clearly states “the law prohibits a plea to a non-alcohol or drug-related violation (when arrested for DWI).”<br />
<br />
That is the result for most, if not all, of the roughly 200 people arrested for DWI by NT police each year. North Tonawanda Police Chief Randy Szukala confirmed a blood alcohol sensor was administered properly and was in good working order at the time of Donovan’s arrest.<br />
<br />
However, Niagara County DWI prosecutor Ted Brenner signed a plea slip on Thursday authorizing the charges be reduced, which was granted on the same day by NT City Court Judge William Lewis.<br />
<br />
The News reviewed the court documents for the case and found a hand-written note from Brenner authorizing the plea deal. The justifications, according to Brenner’s note, were the fact that Donovan has no past criminal record, that the significant damage she did to two parked cars was covered by insurance and, strangely, that her “blood alcohol content was 0.13.”<br />
<br />
Neither Brenner nor Violante returned messages left for them Friday afternoon.<br />
<br />
Their decision left Krawczyk scratching his head.<br />
<br />
“I’ve been doing this for 22 years. I can’t recall even one (case) that I was involved in that that finding was made,” Krawczyk said. “It doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen but I can’t remember it happening, that’s how rare it is.”<br />
<br />
During his time prosecuting DWIs, Krawczyk said his OK would have been needed for any plea deal.<br />
<br />
“I had to authorize anything like that and we never did,” he said of the nine years he spent at the DWI bureau.<br />
<br />
Szukala spoke openly about the police department’s role in the arrest, saying that officers handled the case in a routine manner. Szukala also said Sara Donovan, who is a friend of his own daughter, called him the morning after the arrest to express her remorse.<br />
<br />
“Here’s a girl who was not asking for any favors whatsoever,” Szukala said. “I told her you know we’re not going to look down on you in any way. You made a mistake. You’re going to teach my daughter more by learning from your mistake. She was really sincere that she really screwed up and she was more concerned with my family’s perception of her, so she does have a perspective of how what she did affects other people.”<br />
<br />
He acknowledged the potential threat that the incident posed to public safety and added that DWI is an offense he and his officers do not let slide. He said those who claim their relatives are police officers in an attempt to evade such charges are promptly told instead to call the relative to bail them out.<br />
<br />
While clearly sympathetic to a young woman who Szukala said is normally well behaved and sincerely regretful, the police chief made clear the department’s role ends with an arrest.<br />
<br />
“Once the case is out of my hands — my job was to take a drunk driver off the roads that night. If you have a good attorney ... then that’s not my problem. Once we take a drunk driver off the road, that’s our main concern.”<br />
<br />
Messages left at the Donovan home and on Nancy Donovan’s cell phone were not returned Friday.

Hi Dan,<br />
<br />
Your support and friendship means alot to me and has kept me going through this tough time. <br />
<br />
Sorry this is so long but just need to vent.<br />
<br />
Since my court date is Tuesday....I think I have done all I can for the time being. I will just have to wait until I hear from the attorney after the meeting to see what, if anything, was decided and where I go from here. <br />
<br />
I even told my attorney I would take extra classes or pay a larger fine in the plea if that will help persuade them to eliminate jail time. Like you said...it is all about money and they have lots of cases during the day with bigger fish to fry. <br />
<br />
My case is 9:00AM Tuesday (the 7th) morning so I doubt they will want to bicker all day because they have other cases waiting. I just hope they can come to a decent agreement and not drag this thing out for months, that would benefit no one and cost the court system more money.<br />
<br />
I am hoping the letter from the counselor will show I am serious about what is going on, remorseful and I am serious about making amends. I hope it helps, he is certified with the justice system, has worked for the county my hearing is in and worked doing counseling for the Florida Safety Council who conducts all the classes and assigns the counseling for DUI cases. I am hoping they will let me stay with him for the counseling and not send me to some state counselor who just wants to collect a pay check.<br />
<br />
Plus today is my last day of driving for at least 30 days, so I am kind of sad. My roomie works nearby so I will have transportation for work and I will be out of town on a trip June 16 - 23 so it will help the time go by. I am sure I can find away to get out of the house some so I dotn get cabin fever.<br />
<br />
Depending on the court verdict (if one is rendered on Tuesday) I will be able to apply for a hardship license on July 5th (Business purpose only even though my suspension is a year, I think). It will all work out however it is gonna work out...I have no control over it. Just do what I have to do.<br />
<br />
I expect the worst and hope and pray for the best....you never know what is gonna happen with the "justice" system.<br />
<br />
Please keep your head up, your spirits up and know you are not alone! I will always be on your side!<br />
<br />
Please keep in touch.<br />
<br />
If you want to talk outside of this message board, you can contct me at tsxguy42@yahoo.com<br />
<br />
Take Care,<br />
Mark

Hi Mark<br />
Well you should already know that my fingers are crossed for you, and with the help of the letter that the counselor wrote and that the fact that you didn't register that high , is a good sign, hopefully they will give in to what your lawyer wants so they can move on, I'm sure they have more important cases to work on beside a DUI. I think that they will see the good in you and give you a break, it won't be a slap on the wrist and maybe a little costly, but no jail time, lets face it this is more about money than anything else, as far as getting to driving school, once you're there, ask around and see if someone live close to your area, they can pick you up and drop you off, I pray that your job doesn't find out , with it, life is so much easier, plus it give you a sense of being, I don't know if its to late for this, but to go to schools and talk about not getting a DUI could help (such as a 3 hour school or pre-license) it could show the Judge and DA that you are doing all you can to not make this mistake again and that you are trying to help other from not making the same mistake as we did. But all in all, my prayers are with you, so with that I'm going to end this<br />
<br />
<br />
friend for life<br />
Dan

Hi Dan,<br />
<br />
Just wanted to check up on you.<br />
<br />
My private counselor wrote a letter on my behalf to the court and I am gonna take it to my attorney tomorrow. He states that I sought him out, have been doing well and he sees a positive outsome...I hope it has some sway with the judge/court.<br />
<br />
My pre-trial conference date is this coming Tuesday the 7th so things will be clarified. I need to talk to my attorney and see what he is going to do to counter act the prosecutors first template offer. I know he has filed numerous supression motions for some of the "evidence" so I have a feeling the 7th wont be the last court date.<br />
<br />
My DMV hearing was re-scheduled to June 27th. That will be almost the end of my 30 days "no driving" before I can apply for a hardship license. None of my classes, etc are close enough to bike to plus the fact it is in the 90's here in Florida already. Guess I will be bugging friends and taking cabs.<br />
Because of the nature of my company and the work we do..I cant let them find out about this and I am crossing my fingers there will be no jail time since there were no injuries, no damage and I didnt blow too high.<br />
<br />
I can only hope what I heardo ne time was true....the waiting and unknown is worse than the reality.<br />
<br />
Please cross your fingers and pray for me and I will do the same for you!!!<br />
<br />
Keep in touch!<br />
<br />
Mark

Hi Dan,<br />
<br />
Just wanted to check up on you.<br />
<br />
My private counselor wrote a letter on my behalf to the court and I am gonna take it to my attorney tomorrow. He states that I sought him out, have been doing well and he sees a positive outcome...I hope it has some sway with the judge/court.<br />
<br />
My pre-trial conferencce date is this coming Tuesday the 7th so things will be clarified. I need to talk to my attorney and see what he is going to do to counter act the prosecutors first template offer. I know he has filed numerous supression motions for some of the "evidence" so I have a feeling the 7th wont be the last court date.<br />
<br />
My DMV hearing was re-scheduled to June 27th. That will be almost the end of my 30 days "no driving" before I can apply for a hardship license. None of my classes, etc are close enough to bike to plus the fact it is in the 90's here in Florida already. Guess I will be bugging friends and taking cabs.<br />
Because of the nature of my company and the work we do..I cant let them find out about this and I am crossing my fingers there will be no jail time since there were no injuries, no damage and I didnt blow too high.<br />
<br />
I can only hope that one phrase I heard is true....the waiting and unknown is worse than the reality.<br />
<br />
Please cross your fingers and pray for me and I will do the same for you!!!<br />
<br />
Keep in touch!<br />
<br />
Mark

Dan,<br />
I feel the same....the people I have met and talked to here has helped save me....I came so close to taking an entire bottle of pills because I didnt think I would be able to recover from this....I should not be going thru this at 46 years old. Just the waiting and anticipation is what is killing me the most...I am a technical person so I work in absolutes and facts. I feel out of control and not knowing what is coming next...good or bad is the worst.<br />
<br />
I am hoping common sense reigns in court adn I can only hope, pray and trust everything will be ok.<br />
<br />
Please keep in touch and thanks for listening.<br />
<br />
Mark

Thanks Waltray<br />
The people that I have meet on here help my day go by, I have come to face with the fact that my life has changed and my career is shot, but at 56, I still have a lot of life ahead of me, can't retire yet so it's back to hitting the bricks in search of some kind of work, I know in time this will all be over, but for now it's hell, but again it's people like yourself that makes me say that I have a life, thanks for your help and being here.<br />
<br />
Dan

Friend, you can believe it will all be okay and I wish you all the luck you will need for that.<br />
But, what you HAVE to believe is that if things work out for the worse, YOU have the inner strength and fortitude to step up and deal with the situation.<br />
I did 160 days in one of the worse county jails in the country, lost my license for 5 years, 2 years probation and $9800 fine. I took it like a man and continue to rebuild my life. I even find time to stop and enjoy nature.<br />
Just know, your situation could be much worse.

did you go to jail for the 160 days for a dui?

Yes Melody. 160 days as the only DUI guy with about 80 "real criminals". I had to pay attention to everything. I learned to take care of myself.

Melody, I should have clarified that it was not my 1st. That is a much lighter sentence and fine.

Well I found out today that the prosecutor found out about my first arrest and they are gonna go after me....they want a DUI conviction, year probation, fines, community service, alcohol eval, dui school, driving school, no alcohol at all during probation and a possibility of 30 days jail time.<br />
<br />
I feel like my life is over and I CANT deal with jail. My attorney said the plea was a little vague..he isnt sure if they meant all of the list of classes, evals and probation or take 30 days in jail instead. Dont know what I will do...if I have to go to jail for 30 days...I will lose my job. I dont see how they can justify it...I am hoping that wont happen.<br />
<br />
Just went to a very dark place today. I cant imagine they wanna cram someone in an over crowded jail for a DUI.<br />
<br />
That is the states first offer but I am sure things will be discussed at my June 7th court date. I just dont know what to do right now. You are right about the waiting...not knowing what is gonna happen. The fear on these boards is the just the waiting. But..there is nothing I can do...it is done, I cant take it back and I have no control over the consequences.<br />
<br />
My DMV hearing got re-scheduled but if I get convicted, it is a moot point, they will give me extra suspension.<br />
<br />
My hope has turned into despair today. But...all I can do is continue to see my private counselor, take my meds and keep praying and hoping it all turns out ok.<br />
<br />
I HAVE to believe it will all be ok.

Hi Dan,<br />
<br />
I can relate to everything you are saying...I have good days but it can take only a small word or situation to send me spiralling back into depression and cause me to re-live the whole ordeal. <br />
I am seeing a private counselor and taking meds to help keep me from doing something stupid.<br />
It seems like murderers, rapists and robbers get better treatment...and I think they do because they can't make any money off them like they can us.<br />
I can't face my friends, I can't face my family and I also feel that even though I am in a group of people...I am alone. I went to a concert where there were 20,000 people and I felt alone and like I had a scarlet A on my forehead.<br />
I will be a basket case until I find out the courts decision on Tuesday, June 7th at 9am. They I will have to go face my family for fathers day after that..not sure how I am gonna cope.<br />
I just pray I get a favorable court decision....that is my big worry.....I can deal with the DMV stuff. I can deal with the classes and counselling...I am not sure how I will be able to cope if I get a DUI conviction.<br />
We both just have to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and realize this will not be a permanent situation and we will survive and put this in our rearview mirrors.<br />
<br />
Thank you for listening to me vent and you are always welcome to do the same!<br />
<br />
Take Care!<br />
Mark<br />
I am depressed, anxious, lonely, humiliated, lost tons of weight and some daysI wonder why keep going through the pain.<br />
My DMV hearing got pushed back because they didnt give my attorney all the paperwork on time, plus I am staring at a June 7th court date and not sure how it is gonna go.

Hi Dan...just wanted to touch ba<x>se and check up on you. Was fine all week until the weekend..having a rough time...the anticipatioon of my court date is killing me.<br />
<br />
Been extremely depressed...took a long look at a full bottle of xanax wondering what I should with it. Then came to my senses.

This will NEVER happen again...EVER as long as I live.

Thanks for your support Dan. We dont have DWAI here in Florida...it is either DUI or reckless driving. I am hoping to plea to reckless driving with a fine.<br />
<br />
A friend of mine was pulled for DUI, reckless driving, open container and blew .204!!!!!!!<br />
<br />
He got a plea for reckless driving and a $500 fine. <br />
<br />
My attorney just got my arrest affidavit today and I need it to enroll in DUI school. Once I get it in the mail. I will definitely be enrolled before my court date....ba<x>sed on how full the clases are here...I wont be able to have it done by my court date.<br />
<br />
Hoping for the best for both of us.!<br />
Mark

I can understand your frustration. My first one, I was in a class to where a 19 year old was arrested for DUI and all she got was the class and a $250 fine. WTF?? Plus someone I talked to got pulled for DUI, Reckless and an open container. He plea bargained to reckless and paid a $500 fine and had to do 12 weeks of counseling and AA. I am hoping I have the same luck. The courts are so overwhelmed I am hoping they offer me the same plea. They have bigger fish to fry and state attorneys dont want to be traffic court jockeys.<br />
<br />
It sounds like you got a bum lawyer, I am sorry to hear that. :-( It seems like judgement for this type of offense is all over the place.<br />
<br />
I know how you feel....cant eat, cant sleep, losing weight, had to go to the doctor to get something to ease the depression and to help me sleep. It is the waiting that is eating me alive...just wanna know the decision and start fixing it.<br />
<br />
Please keep your chin up...it will take time but it WILL get better.

check your messages...

thank you for understanding, yes I had an attorney , but I made the mistake of paying him up front, so much for fighting it for me, and the state that I live in is NY, and I got it down to a DWAI, but really it's the same as a dui, and I agree that there is so much more crime out there, but the states can't make any money off them and with us they see a ATM machine, at one time I felt that I could die, if it had not been for my brother calling me everyday, I think that I would have took my life, and trust me, I'm not just saying that, I'm forced to go to meeting that I think is a joke , sitting around listening to people talking about their sick cousin and there roof needs repair is no help at all, and I don't know if I'm gonna be able to complete this , because I can not say that I'm an alcohlic knowing that I am not, I just can't do it, for I drink once a month if that, but this is as I said, just a way of them getting money, when I worked, they took anywhere from 300 to 400 dollars out of my check a week for taxes, which means that I helped pay the paychecks on the people that made these laws, do not get me wrong, I know that drinking and driving is against the law and dangerous, but the punishment doesn't fit the crime, example, the day that I went to pay for my temp. license, i read in the paper of a guy that was found guilty of rapeing two girls age 8 and 10 and received a fine of 1480 dollars and probation, at the time I had already paid out 1500 and there was still fines ahead of me, with this I have losty all faith in the justice system and our government, I no longer will vote for any reason to put another misfit in office, for these guys are just jumping on the bandwagon for a vote.

hey there dan i just got my first dui. was wondering how your job search is going? and was your bac high? howlong has it been since your sentence and how do you feel now?

I can understand 100%. <br />
<br />
My first one scared me but I guess I didnt take it seriously. This one has completely devastated me. I cant sleep, cant eat, cant socialize because I dont know what is going to happen to me. In my mind I have conviceted myself and am expecting the worse...I know that probably wont be the case but I have beat myself up to the point of a mental breakdown.<br />
<br />
I know I am a good person who made a poor decision and I know I am not an alcoholic or any kind of addict. The first time around they tried so hard to label me a drunk and had me take AA meetings and have group counseling. I also ask myself everynight why do my friends that go out and drink virtually every night never get caught? I have the why me syndrome right now.<br />
<br />
Just realize this is not about you...it is about the state making money. It is all about the fees and fines that keep the state running. It is a cash cow. We cannot let this define us, destroy or defeat us. They care nothing about us...we are just a case number and a dollar sign...they have bigger fishes to fry like murderers, robbers and rapists...the REAL criminals. We are the bait fish in the food chain of government.<br />
<br />
Did you have an attorney? What state are you in? Were you convicted of DUI or plea to lesser charge?<br />
<br />
Please keep me up to date how you are doing and best wishes...it will get better.