My Dad Cheated On My Family

i have been feeling like this since i was a kid. my dad really don't love me and my mom that much . at the age of 4 i have another step sister. my dad is having two wives since i was 5 years old until now. in my teenage years i really hated him yet loved him so much.He really give me a lot of depression by having alot of girl friends even though he had 2 wives and he is still keeping them. He asked me to accept my step sister and treat her like a real sister. oh its really a heart pain for me . when i was 13 i really really want to have a happy family life.
however i could never have this kind of happy family in my entire life. i really wonder why people still need to get married even though they are going to be cheated on their spouse.
now i am 25 years old and reacently my dad's new gf is not much older than me. he is reaching 60 soon and still make this mess and let me down. i am really sad though but i have never ever told him once how i feel about him.how can i tell him to stop? he is way older than me and he can think what's wrong and what's right but he still doing these kinds of things to make other family members sad.Moreover , we are buddhist and we do believe in karma. so what if me or my step sister will have a husband like him. marriage is such a fearsome thing for me. i wonder do people really have a happy family? Because of all this reasons,i feel so insecure of my life . Frankly saying i hate loneliness. when i was having my o level exams , nobodies at home even though i am sick or having a high fever .
my dad will never ever know my feelings how he hurt me.
spicecandy spicecandy
22-25, F
1 Response Dec 2, 2012

I share a similar experience too..