We Made Eachother Dysfuctional

It seems like all ive heard these past few days has been yelling. These arguments are at night when everybody is home and when my depression just happens to be the worst.I often think about dying around this time to.The hard part is my family i realize would be a lot worse off without me than with me.
My family has always been dysfuctional sometimes its just worse than others like now.Theres six of us and it always feels like in my family you have to be on somebodies side you just cant be for everyone.
My mom and dad are marrried. But in reality not really.They just live in the same household. Its actually better for them to be together cause if they were separated someone would be homeless as its very hard finacially.
I used to think and fight to keep my family together now i think money and separation would bring peace.Now i just want the arguments to stop.
I am mentally ill because of my family. All the fights physical and verbal messed everyone in my family up.My youngest sister is 15 and she is the worst dealing with.I would almost call her sociopathic or whatever it means when you just dont care about anyone or anything.I dont agree with child abuse but she really make you that angry sometimes and i wont lie i did hit her once.I regretted it it.But enough had been enough.Even if we made her who she is.Just like my parents and older sister made me who i am.

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26-30
Jan 12, 2013